I wanted to share an event that my sister posted to her blog today. My hope is that it can motivate people to realize how their health choices affect children.
My 3yr old niece picks up my cigarette pack and says, "I was going to put fire on these, or is that only for you to do?"
Me: "No that's very bad"
Zoe: "Oh. Is it bad for all the people? Mommy, Asher and Zoe?"
Me: "Yea, and me. I need to stop putting fire to those but..."
Zoe: "But what?"
Me: "Nothing, it's just bad." Commence the guilt attack.
I was so struck by the way my niece phrased her thoughts: I was going to put fire to these. It has such beautiful imagery, and makes me feel like my niece sees my sister as some sort of magician who has the unique ability to light something close to her face on fire.
A three year old cannot understand nicotine addiction, or social pressure, or trying to cope with anxiety and depression. All she can understand about her aunt is that she loves her and wants to emulate her.
I am not writing this to make people to feel guilty. I am an occasional smoker myself, as terrible as that is. What I found important about this event is that it reminded me how children look up to us. They see our actions as pure and justified because we tell them adults are smart. For those reasons we should be vigilant about understanding the health messages we are sending to them.
Kids have a way of phrasing the truth in a very impactful way. Have you ever been dosed some harsh truth about yourself by a child who loves you?
Recommend
Comments (10)
Out of the Mouths of Babes! Both my parents deaths were related to cigarette smoking...I'm sure you are already thinking on it, but quitting is the best thing you could do for your health at this stage..
My mom has smoked a good portion of her life. She quit smoking on my brother's birthday (August 10th) and hasn't touched one cigarette since.
I love this post because it is so true. Children look up to the adults in their lives, and it makes me sad when I see parents making poor choices while their little ones look on. I am not perfect, and have learned a lot about myself and my choices after realizing just how much my children were affected by what I was doing. I used to swear, a lot. When my daughter was 3 years old, she called me a b***** when I told her it was time for bed. My initial reaction was to put her in time out for saying a bad word, and then it hit me.... She had learned that word from me! How could I possibly punish my daughter for repeating my poor behavior? I sat her down and briefly explained cursing to her, and how she shouldn't do it. I also told her Mommy and Daddy would be careful not to say bad words too. The whole experience was quite an eye opener for me.
YES. Children watch and learn from everything you do... everything.
As for harsh truths from children, yes, but in a different way... I still remember one of my little cousins asking why I had "spots" on my face when I was younger. Yep, acne.At least you are her niece. The most influential person in our lives is our same sex parent. But she may use you as a roll model. My daughter in law says for my grandson's first birthday, in two weeks, she'll quit smoking. I'll believe it when I see it. The percentage of those going cold turkey ain't very high, and so I asked her to seek out a doctor who could prescribe something to take the edge off, and help her with a long term plan. I think she's going to try it alone, but oh I'd love to see her quit. She's a beautiful girl, and a long and healthy life is the greatest gift she can give her children. I lost my mom at 52.
I work in a casino and literally today these 2 girls walked by some machines (you need to in order to get to certain rooms for parties, ect) and they couldn't have been older than 5 but the girls said when they are old enough they are going to gamble too.. I suppose it isn't so bad, but when I was that age, I had no clue what gambling even was.. Until I got old enough to play Mario Kart and bet my brothers our chores :P Then again, I do live in Vegas... :/
This makes me think of my parents eating habits. My dad drinks back to back pepsi all day, and lives off of of potato chips. As an adult, if I have chips and pop around, I have the same habits because thats how I grew up. Now, I make a conscious effort to keep pop out of my house.
@rachmorgan01 - Very powerful, thanks for sharing your story!
@wildchildofthebluemoon@xanga - YES, parent's food choices influence their children's eating habits! My dad was an avid Pepsi drinker. Luckily there were always totally off limits to us, and I prefer rootbeer ;)
Nice info