Thursday, 10 May 2012
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Time Magazine Sheds Light on Extended Breastfeeding
“You’re STILL doing that? Isn’t she old enough to stop that? If she can ask for it, then she’s too old!” Yep, I’ve heard them all. My daughter is 13 months old so that means I have crossed the line into, no-mans land, a.k.a. Extended Breastfeeding.
I didn’t plan to breast feed past one year, shoot, I didn’t even know if I’d make it to six months! I’m not a co-sleeping, granola-crunching, attachment parent that people would expect to do something so “audacious” like breastfeed my toddler. I’m just a mom that wants to give my child the best of me.
Breastfeeding didn’t come easy for us. My milk took nine days to come in and my daughter didn’t latch on for nearly two weeks. It took lots of tears, persistence, and hours with Dr. Google to make it through those rough first months of nursing, but we made it. I fought so hard to give my baby the best food in the world, so why the hell would I stop giving to her because of what some ignorant people might say?
The recent Time magazine cover featuring Jamie Lynne Grumet nursing her nearly four year old son made me think about why I am continuing to nurse my toddler and has sparked a lot of debate nationwide.
But, why?
Nursing is the most natural things a mother can do for her child. Some may say that he’s too old, or that he doesn’t need to breastfeed. But who is to determine that? Women have been nursing toddlers since the beginning of time, yet now it is not socially acceptable? I admit that before I gave birth I judged a friend of mine that nursed her son for 14 months. I thought she was a quack! Why would anyone want to nurse for that long, it was weird, unnatural, and made me very uncomfortable when she nursed in front of me! I was ignorant. Ignorant about the tremendous physical and emotional health benefits of breastfeeding. And I recently admitted to her what I had thought about her extended breastfeeding and apologized for my thoughts. Who was I to judge her? And yet here I am in the same position being judged.
I think a lot of Americans are as uneducated as I was and that is a huge problem. So many other countries accept extended breastfeeding as the norm. And yet here, a beautiful magazine cover with a mother nourishing her child is looked at like a freak show. America needs to wake up and support mothers that dedicate themselves to EB for the sake of their children. If more doctors and parents talk about the benefits of EB maybe it would encourage more mothers to EB. Breastfeeding takes a lot of work, dedication, and support from friends and family in order to succeed. I’m so thankful for the Time’s cover picture because it will spark a lot of debate and hopefully get more people to think about what EB means for the child.
As for me and my baby, there’s no end date for our breastfeeding sessions. I’ll continue to nurse her as long as she wants. Whether that be another week or three more years, it’s our prerogative.
What do you think about the Time magazine cover? Do you think it will bring some good light on extending breastfeeding?
How long did you nurse your child?
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Comments (69)
lol...happy mothers day
Honestly the only reason people are freaking out is bc he's still nursing. If women were pumping and giving their kids breastmilk in a cup no one would care. Society can hardly handle moms bfing their new born in public, much less their 2 year olds. It's sad, and really silly.
I didn't breast feed, but even if I had I'm pretty sure I would've stopped the first time one of my kids bit me, lol. My youngest brother nearly drew blood from biting my mom when he was 9months old. I was only 9yo at the time, it was pretty scary to me lol!
@kristinabean@xanga - I totally agree with you. Live and let live.
Parents need to stop judging each other and other parenting styles. What works for one family may not work for another family. Each child is unique and each family has a unique dynamic. We shouldn't keep judging one another, it's not doing us any good.
I don't think there's anything wrong with it in a biological sense, but that child will get bullied for that photograph no matter how you look at it. I think two is a good age to stop, but if you're going to keep going for longer, don't publish photos in international magazines for the world to see, because you're just asking for your child to be bullied, and you'll possibly cause him to resent you as well. There's a mother in England who breast fed her daughter until she was nine and in MIDDLE SCHOOL. Now I'm sorry if I'm missing some huge health benefit here, but nine is too old. Kids start puberty around that age and there's no way you should be breastfeeding a nine year old who could easily get her period or whatever.
I am all for extended breastfeeding!!
Before I had a child, I knew I would breastfeed but I didn't know for how long and/or if I'd stick to it. Seemed weird to me because I'd never seen it before.
I've been breastfeeding my son for 6 months now and I don't see myself stopping any time soon. APA recommends breastfeeding for 1-2 years!! 24 months is my goal.
I think the cover of this magazine is making it look way different then it actually is. Also, the title of the article "Are you Mom enough?" I think will put a lot of people off.
People who think extended breastfeeding is GROSS, needs to educate themselves.
It's your breast and you can do whatever you want with them. However, I'm more concerned with the child's psychological development and whether or not EB affects that positively or negatively.
@TiredSoVeryTired@xanga - LOL, make them gay? People really thought that nursing from a WOMAN'S BREAST would make a boy gay? I will EBF, if there aren't any freak problems that prevent it, and I really don't care if any of my children are gay... but if anyone says that to me, I will probably tell them that I'm trying to make them breast men!
@TiredSoVeryTired@xanga - I grew up with my neighbor being an animal hoarder & she never weaned any of them herself, the animals just wouldn't let the babies nurse. As far as getting teeth goes, I don't mean a full set, I mean enough to chew & a digestive system that can handle solids. 6 seems a little old, honestly. Older than 2 or 3 I think starts to border on inappropriate because after 3 children are so intelligent & conscious of everything around them. It stops becoming instinct & becomes more of a habit. My mother told me at the daycare I was at when I was young, a woman still nursed her 5 year old & when she walked in he would immediately try & rip her shirt off to get some milk. Once they can stomach a balanced diet (around 2 or 3), they're not getting any extra nutrients from you that they can't get from their own food, so what's the point then? I can understand trying to give the child the best in life, but I simply believe it's unnecessary.
I breastfed my son for 3 months, but i had to stop because my milk dried up due to stress and not eating enough. I wanted to breastfeed until he was at least 6 months, or longer if it happened that way. But sadly i couldn't. I'm expecting my second child in December and i plan on trying again, this time with a lot more knowledge and experience. Again, i'm aiming for 6 months but it could be longer.
While i'll admit the idea of breastfeeding beyond 2 makes me a little weirded-out, i can understand why a lot of people do it. I'd say the reason it makes me uncomfortable is just the age and maturity of the child. However, i've never done it so it may be absolutely no different than nursing a 1 month old. I'd say if it's what you choose to do and it feels right, go for it! There should be no shame in it.
I find it odd, but to each there own. As long as it is being done for the health reasons of the child and not the need and attachment of the parent, so be it.
Just out of curiosity, why NOT a breast pump? "money" aside, is there an extra benefit from it being directly from the breast?
@HopeWithinReach@xanga - I could not use a breastpump even though directly from the breast worked fine. And not all breastpumps are created equal, nor do they mimic a proper feeding session accurately which causes the proper balance of milk throughout a feed.
I could understand breastfeeding for that long in a situation (referring to the picture) where there was really no other food nutritiousness food for the child--like poverty, war or famine--but if you can afford to buy food, then I don't really see the point of EB.
I don't care what people do as long as it doesn't fuck their children up for life or make them feel eternally dependent on their mothers lol.
I found the magazine cover amusing because I knew it would be controversial.
My favorite coverage of this topic was on Desperate Housewives when a woman kept doing it because it was a great way to keep weight off.
The only one I tried nursing was my first child and it wasn't a success because my milk didn't come in for days so I became impatient. Even if I did nurse, I wasn't planning to for more than six months anyway. I'm a very busy individual with business and meetings to run all the time so if I was to give breast milk, it would have been with the help of those suction machines.
If your child can feed themselves then they are to old to still be sucking a tit. Let the child grow up. -_- That's just nasty but whatever floats peoples boats.
I don't know how really efficient it is to BF a child for longer than usual, so I can't really have a say in this. I mean, I have my own opinions about the matter, but that's it.
Other than that, like I said before in @TheTheologiansCafe post, I'd feel kind of awkward reading a magazine with a woman breastfeeding a child that looks like he's ten years old (of course, later I just found out that he's actually 4). Call me ignorant if you want, but I'm just being honest about this is allOn the real - good for her for having the courage to pose for this, I hope her son will say "my mom had courage". On a personal level, my husband and I kind of laughed and quoted a line from the Adam Sandler movie, Grown Ups "I'm 48 months!" lol
On a broader spectrum I just sighed and know its another way to sell issues and another reason for parents to judge parents. Its too bad we can't be accepting of our parenting skills. Whatever works for you, as a parent, is what works for you and that should be enough. Unless you're beating your kids then whatever parenting issue you choose should come to one end result which is love. Unfortunately positive reinforcement doesn't really sell, just the controversial stuff.
@TiredSoVeryTired@xanga - I WANT ORANGES
I think an acceptable age for children to stop breast feeding is when children start eating solid food. It's just awkward when mothers breastfeed a 3 year old in public. My sister-in-law did it with my nephew and is starting to do the same thing with my niece. It just doesn't seem right. I suppose that people have been doing it for a long time, but I think people should do it in private if they are going to, and not put it on a national magazine cover. Just a thought.
@TiredSoVeryTired@xanga - I don't understand why you're directing this question to me? It's okay to say you agree with the article and support the photo without picking fights with anyone who doesn't. I don't even understand where you're coming from with your comments, to myself and everyone else.
@wretched_epiphany@xanga - lol Well, my boys both bit me while nursing but they learned quick not to! The pain was a hell of lot less than birthing was though!
@QuantumStorm@xanga - What about tangerines?
@PreMommy@xanga - I said it to you because you complained about a woman who was breastfeeding her 3-year-old. You said it was unnatural, and it is not. It may not be cultural in America, and that's why you're offended by the picture. Less people would be outraged if it was a "native" woman nursing her child.
@WaitingToShrug@xanga - I know! Some people's logic makes no damn sense! Good luck to you! Extended breastfeeding is good for the child (best nutrition on the planet for humans) and you (aids in preventing breast cancer).