Tuesday, 24 April 2012
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What Happens When Mom Gets Sick?
When I started writing this post it was about Pregnant Hollywood, but because of how I feel tonight I have completely changed my tune. It is the night before Easter and I am sick. I have three articles to write today, 50 gift bags to make for the children at church, and a child to take care of and I can barely hold my head up. Moms, how do you do it? I am a single mom. I do not live near family, and I have a child with special needs. I do not have the luxury to become sick, but what mom does? I really want to know what other mom’s do?
How do you organize your day? Do you order pizza for dinner? Do you let your kids run wild while you try to rest on the couch? Do you have preventative techniques that keep you healthy all year round? Seriously, what do you do?
I have a problem. I am a people pleaser. I don’t know how it happened, but I can’t say no. I also have a problem with asking for help. When most women become mother’s they grow a backbone. I always had a backbone, but somehow I lost it when my son was born. On days like today, I wish I could just call someone and ask for help. I wish I could say I can’t do anymore. You are just going to have to wait, but I can’t. Instead, I tend to my first priority, my son. I make sure all of his needs are taken care of for the day, and let me tell you he is high maintenance. I clean my house. I go to the grocery store. I make dinner. I have been working on the gift bags all day. Did I mention that gift bags have are completely homemade. The sad thing is the people at church don’t even know I am making them, but I bought the bags and the Easter eggs, so I feel like it has to be done.
I really want to hear your sick stories. Now, keep it clean…you know what I mean. Do you have any suggestions on how I can take care of myself without neglecting my son? Hopefully, I will be able to get him to bed and finally settle in for some well deserved sleep.
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Comments (11)
Lots and lots of drugs. I used to just be sick and let things take their course, but now I double up on pain killers, drink theraflu, use herbal remedies - whatever combination hypes me up enough to make it to nap time.
Also, we were sick a lot this winter, so if I thought it might be treated with antibiotics, I went to the doctor immediately. I am bad at guessing and I let strep throat go for quite a few days (TWICE) before I finally went to the doctor, only to find out that I would have felt better within 24 hours of a penicillin shot!
One thing I have learned is that its OK to ask for help.
Its ok to admit you can't do it, and that you need someone to help.
I am thankful for my husband, and my parents... My back went out about a month ago and I was in crazy pain for 2 weeks.. Finally one morning I caved. I couldn't lift our toddler one more time or I was sure I was going to die. My husband stayed home from work and did everything. The next day my parents came and took over, and my dad took me to the massage therapist in the afternoon.
(Side note, I love my massage therapist. She is an angel =)
Last spring I got really sick, and my husband couldn't take any time off work.. so he called a babysitter to come for the day.
I don't know how single parents do it sometimes.. one of my best friends is a single dad and I remember when he got in a car accident and cracked his rib cage.. he was able to go home pretty quick, but he also had to accept that he needed help.. he said it was easy to acknowledge he needed help, but it was a much harder thing to ask for the help and accept it.
Hope you feel better!
There's no shame in asking friends for help when family is unavailable. Everyone needs help at some point in their lives.
Exactly how special needs is your boy? Does he require strict supervision and super amounts of care, or is he able to take care of certain things by himself? I've been blessed to have a relatively independent four-year-old. He's able to get his own drinks from the fridge, and his daddy will leave a basket of snacks within his reach so he doesn't get hungry while I'm busy dying on the couch. He's not entirely potty-trained yet, but he knows how to change his own pull-up when he has the occasional accident. We give him free reign with the Wii so that he stays in one room and doesn't make a mess.
It's alright to ask for help. This post is not intended for you, as I'm sure you are the most wonderful mommy your child could ask for. But parents of teens who are pregnant could use a wake up call. There's a plethora of reasons teens should not be parenting, one being their brain cells are still developing, and two, it's just too damn unfair to the child.
Moms can't be sick....
I don't have a child, but whenever I'm sick and still have to go to work or study, I just dose myself up on all the medication possible - cold/flu tablets, cough syrup, throat lozenges - and make sure you drink plenty of water. Dehydration when you're sick is the worst. It is hard when you're sick and you still have responsibilities (be it a job, school or a child) but you just have to make do. If your child is relatively independent, set them up with some kind of activity - colouring, playing with building blocks or even put them in front of the television. It's not a crime to sit back once in a while, especially when you're sick, and you won't damage him by letting him watch some television for half an hour or an hour while you get some of your energy back.
Hope you feel better soon!
i put a movie on and nap as much as I can. yup, pizza for dinner, or mac n cheese or whatever is easy. Don't burn yourself out.
daddy makes you soup or orders you pizza :D haha.
It's alright to ask for help where it's needed; I'm sure the people who love you will be glad to be of assistance!
When I was a little kid, my mum had a pretty bad fever. She told me she wasn't feeling too well, so I decided to take it upon myself to prepare cold compresses, herbal teas, and helped my dad with housework. We got takeaway for dinner, so mum could just stay in bed and get well.
godbless you. you are an amazing mom and person. You are so strong, sometimes you feel weak and want someone to help and take care of you - this person would come. I am sure people want to help - let them help, even if it is doing something small for you like bringing you some milk or take your child to school and invite you over to dinner so you don't have to cook. Just give them a chance. They would appreciate being able to do something for you. Since you are so nice - you have supporters, there are more good people out there than something we think there are. Good luck and feel better soon.
The best thing I feel any parent who is sick can do is call in reinforcements. Something I learned the hard way was that you don't get better if you're doing everything by yourself. When you're sick, your body needs rest in order to fight off illness, but how can your body do what it needs to do if you're over working it? I have found that if I let all housework slide, whip up simple food (PB & J for dinner), and only do what is absolutely necessary, I recover sooner. A few years ago, I had a horrible stomach flu. I had a fever, chills, body aches, and was throwing up every half hour or so. I would get dizzy when I stood up as well which was the worst part. I was also home alone with my 3 children who were 4, 22mo, and 9mo. After suffering for the majority of the day (my hubby worked until 7:15pm), I finally called my mother and begged her to come help me. She showed up within a half hour, took care of the kids and even did some housework for me.