Tuesday, 13 December 2011
I've been married for 9 years. I've known my husband for 11 years. When we started dating and got married, we heard all sorts of advice from all sorts of people. Most of it was good advice, some of it was bad. We were told "you guys will never make it. You should just break up." (Husband was military and gone most of the beginning of our relationship.) We were told "Don't go to bed angry, you'll regret it." Over the years I've just thrown that bit of advice out the window. Everyone knows that going to bed angry can lead to angry sex and that's just awesome!
But the best advice I've ever gotten I gave to myself. I've watched friends fall in love, get married (or not), be miserable, and break up. I've seen people stay in relationships that will always be miserable just for the sake of the children or just because they are afraid of what may be on the other side of the break up. And I've drawn a conclusion that has led to the best relationship advice ever: Most people are so excited about living together that they forget to live for each other.
In order to have a happy successful relationship, you have to live your life to make your partner happy. And if they are doing the same for you, how can you be miserable? It's when one person gets selfish and takes the other for granted that the problems start. One person can't always be the taker and one can't always be the giver.
So here's my advice for you: Don't just live with each other, live FOR each other.
What's the best advice you were ever given? And how has it helped you?