I've seen young girls in the salon before, usually off to the side watching their mom get their hair styled and playing with toys. I've never seen one in the salon chair though. I've never seen one waiting to get her eyebrows plucked (or waxed), or talking about what highlights and lowlights she wants. I've never seen a young a girl waiting anxiously for her first bikini wax, yet this is happening all over the place.
On the news they had a whole story about young girls going to the salon... are they too young?
One could argue that a bikini wax is for hygienic purposes, that's a legitimate reason, but for an 11 year old? Aren't 11 year olds supposed to be playing with dolls? It's stuff like this that worries me, as I sit here 21 weeks pregnant with a girl. I was a girl, and back in my day, at 11, I was playing Barbies. I had no interest in boys or makeup, I just wanted to play and annoy my siblings.
Is there an age that you'd start to introduce your daughter to salon services? What sort of services do you think are appropriate and at what age?
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I'm just as frustrated with my twin nine-year-old nieces. When I was nine, I was either busy building a barn for my breyer horses out of tooth picks, or on a girl scout camping trip. All of my clothes were hand me downs, I wore coke-bottle glasses, and I was convinced only married people kissed.
For Christmas, my nieces are asking for cosmetics. And not play make-up, but real, expensive Sephora make-up.
I have no problems buying nail polish, but an eye-lash curler?!
Idk... At 11 I would have loved a bikini wax. I was crazy hairy by then. I didn't go swimming in a bathing suit until I was 16.
I think the most concerning part about little girls engaging in "grown up" behavior is the actual adults allowing and/or encouraging it. I mean, I am okay with little girls getting manicures and haircuts when they are young, but I believe bikini wax, highlights/color should be for girls a little older. I've even seen a 2-year-old with highlights. (Gasp!) Around 11 or 12, I was a bit concerned about body hair, like on my legs and underarms, but my parents wouldn't allow me to shave it--I did it anyway. But you better believe I wasn't concerned about getting a bikini wax or highlights at that age. I did want to groom my eyebrows though, they were bushy. Thankfully my mom didn't let me go pluck-crazy and showed me how to pluck only the strays. I didn't wear makeup until I was 17, though, and not the full face's worth of makeup only until recently (I'm 29 now). As long as the parent is paying for the treatments, I'd say basics like manicures and haircuts are okay for little girls, basic makeup like mascara, lipgloss and blush (and skincare regime) at 13 and up but the "premium" services such as waxing and hair color--when she can afford to pay for her own.
My daughter has only gotten her hair cut at a salon, since I get my haircut there too and we personally know the stylist. Anyway, those other things mentioned, I would say after 16. At least, for my daughter. I definitely think 11 is too young for a bakini wax. I never started getting my hair highlighted or my eyebrows waxed till I was 18.
I do not really see a problem with it. Maybe it was because I had an older sister, but I always interested in those kinds of things when I became seven or eight.
I also do not think bikini waxing is horrible for girls either. If it weren't for the boy shorts that came in style for swimsuits, I would not have been able to go swimming for years. I can only imagine how horrible it would have been if I was in gymnastics, swimming, dance, or something else that has outfits that shows pubic hair if it is not removed.
When I was 11, I wore eyeshadow, lip gloss and blush. I will start sugaring my daughter's eyebrows and stuff when she's old enough to understand the upkeep and is willing to deal with the temporary pain. I'm a very vain person and just got my license as a skin therapist, so her skin is always going to look good. I don't think it's a bad thing but if they are under 10, just facials and under the age of 17 they are too young for a chemical peel.
My hair dresser said these 5 and 8 year old sisters came in wanting blonde highlights for their already blonde hair. My hair dresser refused it. I personally think they should ban such treatments for those under a certain age (such as under 15 or 16). There's no reason that a little girl needs this stuff. I don't even get facials and waxes.
I'm of the opinion that we should let kids be kids. My daughter is 5 and she is not allowed to get her ears pierced until she's 10 and has serious desire for it. She will not be allowed to wear makeup (other than lipgloss) until she's 15. On her 15th birthday, if she wants, she and I will have a beauty day and we'll visit a make-up professional who will teach her how to use it.
Waxing? I'm appalled that at 11 years old, there would be a "need." Who the heck is seeing so much of their private area to know that there is hair there to begin with? And bikinis? Not allowed until 15 or 16 - I haven't decided. My daughter wears a surf suit.
As for hair dying, I would think that at some point there will be legislation banning it, just like they have done with tanning beds.
Children these days are encouraged (and sometimes even seeking) to look older at earlier and earlier ages. Why is this occurring? Personally, I believe this is due to largely to advertising and companies. For example, not only can some salons market towards women and men, but now they have a new client: little Sarah, bravely following in her mother's footsteps. Her mother will be paying for her services and (so the salon hopes) little Sarah will be continuing the services as she enters adulthood.
It's all about making profit. It's just like how cigarette companies once tried to market towards young children. The goal of these companies is to bring in the next generation of cliental - at any costs. So whether it's putting cartoon images on cigarette ads, or convincing mommy that Sarah should get her own eyebrows waxed too (at 50% off - oh wow!) businesses and advertising firms will do what it takes to make a profit.
I'm 20 years young and do not have children, but when I do, I will most certainly not bring them into these types of practises. Certain grooming does need to be done - washing their hair, bathing, cutting toenails, etc...but this is just taking things too far.
I will also not be subjecting my children into beauty pageants and the like - think Toddlers and Tiaras. If any of your moms out there (just a little shout-out, since this is Momaroo) want your children to partake in these salon services, then by all means, that is your choice. You should raise your child the best way that you see fit. But personally, I wouldn't condone it.
There's an overwhelming pressure for both men and women to be beautiful, slim, and perfect. I loved my childhood because, although it still existed as I grew up, I wasn't subjected to the insane and often unattainable beauty standards as much as I am today: I was free to be a kid.
I wore comfy hand-me-downs or no-name brand clothes that allowed to me to run around and play freely. I wasn't playing hop-skotch worrying about if my eyeliner was smudged or if my eyebrows looked okay after last night's wax at the salon with mom. I was out being a kid, in the truest, most care-free sense.
I could only hope that all children get the same experience.
Well, personally I can empathize with the feeling of being embarrassed by the presence of hair on my body and the discomfort that caused me. But this was only when I was old enough to actually be aware of the fact that this is what society deems acceptable for women today. I think 11 years old is slightly too young for that. Sure haircuts mostly require a visit to the salon, but I think waxing can be put off till kids hit their teens. Also, I think changes to your hair and your appearance should only be done when you have a sense of who you are and who you want to be, and not simply on a whim. And again, that kind of maturity is hardly present in a 11 year old.
Being against waxes is all well and good, but I was bullied at age twelve for not shaving my legs, and I know many girls who were too embarrassed to go swimming because they had pubic hair and didn't know how to deal with it. I mean, I don't think kids should be getting loads of piercings and facials and all that at a young age, but there is NOTHING wrong with getting rid of excess body hair, especially if it's going to stop them getting ostracised and bullied - kids are cruel, remember.
No need to worry about it. Just don't take her there if you're against it! :D She won't be able to drive herself there until she's at least 16.
Also, I just want to point out that, like you said, you've never seen kids that young getting salon services. That means that it's not that widespread, at least not in your area. Yes, it is happening, but I really don't think it's that common.
I'm a teenager now, but I've been going to the salon since I was 3, for hair-care. I'm biracial and my parents didn't know what to do with my hair. Often times I wish they hadn't, because it kind of ruined my hair and my perspective on how it should be taken care of.
I disagree with a lot of people here. I got bullied for have pubic hair but I wasn't allowed to shave it or my underarms or legs yet. I wouldn't take my kid to get a bikini wax at 11 only because it is so painful. I would teach her how to use a razor first. For example I am blonde but I have a lot of body hair if i get with a guy who has darker hair than me I would let my daughter wax her face at a young age so that she doesn't hear "you have a mustache" which I even hear even though it's barely visible. I don't believe "hair removal" is sexualizing your child, but I wouldn't let them wear make up quite yet.
Ick...
I don't know why but it's not the fact that little girls are becoming interested in makeup at such an early age that bothers me. It's how BRATTY and spoiled they are starting to act about it. It's harsh but I've seen girls in late elementary school years and middle school years pretty much act like little skanks. I live in a rich area, and at somerset mall I will often see those girls acting like valley girl divas in sephora using words like "haut" and "fabulous". This one girl was looking at urban decay eyeliner, "I'm going to buy you that for christmas, (she tells her friend) it will make you look so super sexy."
I want to pull my hair out! They are just too young to realize how obnoxious they are acting!
In short child appropriate makeup is okay. But they probably just can't handle grown up makeup because it makes their heads too big.
Oh also I started wearing makeup at ten years old, but it was play makeup. Things like sparkly lipgloss, and light pink eyeshadow. And NO it did not turn me into a slut. I really have to roll my eyes to the helicopter moms who think play makeup will turn their daughter into a harlot.
@WaitingToShrug@xanga - Smart thinking. Maybe it's that simple
I HEAR about it an awful lot. I've never seen it.
I suspect it's blown way out of proportion.Let me address one issue first...
"One could argue that a bikini wax is for hygienic purposes, that's a legitimate reason"It's not a legitmate reason. Pubic hair actually has a purpose. It keeps the vaginal area clean and traps things from getting there. (like eyelashes). When your older it secretes sex hormones. Waxing that hair opens you up to a higher risk of infection and stis.
That being said. I personally prefer to shave / wax. There's nothing unhygienic about pubic hair.
Back in the stone age, when I was 11/12, I knew girls with perms, dyed hair etc. I had a perm myself. We wore make-up and bikinis on the beach, mini-skirts, crazy "mall hair", skin tight painted on jeans etc. However, I am pretty sure we would have called CPS if our mom's would have tried to take us to get a bikini wax. I think our parents picked their battles wisely and make-up and clothes just wasn't as important as teaching as appropriate behavior around boys or men that only meant to do us harm.
Most of my friends at the time didn't grow up to be strippers, porn stars, or hookers. Most of them did not get pregnant when they were teens. The only people I knew that ended up that way are people whose parents tried so hard to be their friend or spent so much time trying to protect them from the world they didn't teach them how to function as an adult.
My stance on body hair is going to be the same as my mom's. It'll be my daughters body hair to do whatever the hell she wants to do with it. If she is lucky like me, she'll only need a bikini wax. However, she shouldn't expect a mother daughter bonding experience over it.
When I was eleven years old and that was over fifty years ago,...I remember wanting to get my hair cut and wanting to sit in the beautician's chair,..like the full grown women. I wanted anything that could be done for me that would make me prettier..as I was well aware that a girl's worth was not judged by her brains,..but by her looks.
HOW SAD THAT THIS MESSAGE CONTINUES TODAY TO YOUNG GIRLS!
...I wasn't even allowed to shave my legs until I was 13, much less go in for a waxing.
I don't really see any problem with it, though. A lot of girls hit puberty early and are self-conscious about how much body hair they suddenly have. I figure, if it keeps them from being picked on for being hairy, BECAUSE WE ALL KNOW KIDS ARE GODDAMN CRUEL, then why not allow it? She'll definitely feel better about her body, the bullies will have to find some other reason to pick on her, and all will mostly be well. If she wants to wear makeup, fine. Just help her pick out something appropriate for her age and skin type. I do think the hair treatments are a bit unnecessary, but it's not like a cut and color ever killed anybody. Tanning is where I would draw the line, I think. There's no reason a little girl should ever visit a tanning bed/booth/whatever.
Ugh...that's not the worst. When I was 12 I saw g-strings for 6 year olds and 2 weeks later they stopped selling them.
I started trimming/shaving my pubic hair as soon as I thought about it. I didnt know girls even did that at all. i just thought it was extremely uncomfortable and i never felt REALLY clean. I wold have appreciated it if someone had offered to wax/pluck my eyebrows at that age! I was never used to having all that hair, and im still not.
I really dont think its sexualizing young girls. (as someone mentioned) It just made me feel more comfortable. Besides, isn't waxing/shaving making womans vaginas look like little girl vaginas? Wouldn't that be grown women/men sexualizing young girls and not young girls sexualizing themselves by trying to be like grown women? I never got that... Its a bit twisted. Oh well.
I would take my 11 year old daughter to get her eyebrows plucked (one of my daughters got my eyebrows... which are horribly thick), nails done, and a hair cut. None of that other stuff though, its not necessary. I say if its a bikini wax for pure comfort/hygene its okay. I think some moms just do it because they want their daughters to be just like them. Hence the highlights and other facial waxing.
Why would an 11 year old need a bikini wax? Totally weird. My daughter is 4 months old. I just got her ears pierced, with cute girly pink flowers. I'll take her to a salon to get her hair cut when it's time, and when she is older maybe even have a girls' spa day, but that includes like a short massage and pedicure or something. There's no need to start teaching 11 year olds to be so vain and worried about their looks. Let them be little kids, it is bad enough once they get in high school.