Saturday, 03 September 2011
I am currently recovering from a surgery. When I gave birth to My Flower Child, I somehow managed to screw up all my inner workings, and gave myself some big ol' gallstones. I have just had the blasted thing out, after a 4 week battle with my insurance company and the surgeon. It finally got all scheduled and set up, and at last, on Monday it was taken out.There were some pre-op concerns mostly to do with my kidneys and my liver, both of which were damaged by my pregnancy, and apparently there were some problems during my surgery as well. They didn't really tell me what happened but what I know is that I went to sleep expecting one incision for the scope and one for the removal and woke up with five.About a week before the surgery, my doctor recommended that I had off the baby to a sitter, or her father, because I really shouldn't be lifting anything over ten lbs. My Flower Child is growing up so fast, she almost weighs 13 lbs now!! I reluctantly handed her off to her father the day before my birthday, (the 17th) but by this past weekend I was losing my mind from not seeing her. I called her father, and braved the disapproval from my medicine man. I had her all weekend, and I enjoyed every minute of it. When Monday rolled around though, I had to yet again relinquish my child to her father. I am on bed rest currently, and have been told that due to possible infection, and the possibility of reopening my incisions that I am not to handle my child for a minimum of 2 weeks, and possibly as long as 4 weeks.ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME?!!??!?!I can't imagine not seeing her, or handling her, or holding her, feeding her, cuddling her for more than a week. When she was gone for 4 days I missed her so bad, I was starting to become visibly depressed. Miss Lady kept trying to keep me cheerful, but it's so hard to do when the light of my life is somewhere else. It's been four days now since I have seen her and I feel like a junkie. I feel like I am going through withdraw. I miss my beautiful girl so much. How can I heal effectively if I am in such a state of mental turmoil from being separated from My Flower Child?And so you don't get the wrong idea, I am NOT an attachment parent. I know how to put my child down, and I do. When things need to get done, she goes in the bouncy chair, with some blues clues or something. But not needing to hold her 24/7 and not getting to see her at all are two very different things.Should I wait the recommended amount of time before I take her back? Or should I say screw it and take her back as soon as I am mobile again?