Monday, 29 August 2011
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In The Blink Of An Eye
Tonight while Kadyn was playing in her room, I decided to tackle the mountain of clothing that had piled up in the corner. I pulled the things I thought were too small aside, separated summer/winter, and then shirts/pants. As I was folding them up, I took a few seconds with each of Kadyns pieces of clothing that she has outgrown. I stopped to think of one memory from when she had worn it, then put it in a box. I wanted to cry the entire time.
Honestly, my reaction to the clothes with labels that read "too small" was "THAT is too small for her already? I just bought that! She only got to wear it twice! I cant believe we're in 12 month clothes already. I remember when I first moved her from newborn to 0-3. O my God.. Before I know it.. I'll be buying her a bra!"
My insides turned to mush.. I wanted to drop everything and hold her.. When she put her hands on my shoulder to pull up on me, I reached over and gave her the biggest hug possible.
On top of it, all day today I had been avoiding boxing up her bottles. My dad washed them all, and kept saying "you need to pick out the ones that need to go up"
Me - "Yea yea ... I will... Gotta do __ first". After dinner, I made myself stand in front of the sink and pick out which ones I was going to box up. I didn't have a hard time with the cheapo "Oh crap, need more bottles" bottles. I had a hard time with the Medela bottles. The ones we used when she came home from the hospital. I really might pick ONE and use it as a flower vase or something. That way it can still have a purpose, AND I get to be reminded of her itty bitty days.I know that she HAS to grow up, the alternative is much worse. I am trying my hardest to take in every little thing she does. I record as much as possible, and take as many pictures as possible. I used to make fun of the "sappy moms".
I AM one now, and would probably make fun of the moms who weren't sappy.
I love my daughter with all of my heart.
Her growing up hurts my heart, but also fills with me with pride.. and joy... (HEY! I understand why they say that now!)
Its crazy how time flies.... In the blink of an eye..
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About the Author
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- From: RebeccaPMiller@xanga
- Name: Becky
- About Me: Im 24, from South Carolina... Living in VA Married to a former marine *March 17, 2009* Mom to an angel baby that we lost at 11 weeks and to a baby girl that was born on Sept 2, 2010. (Our miracle) Im a SAHM that is completely dedicated to making the best life possible for her baby girl.. We recently found out we're expecting baby number 2. (#3 in my heart) My life is messy and sometimes hectic.. but I wouldn't trade it for anything.
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True
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Comments (4)
sweet =)
I feel the same about both my kids and randomly cry about it all the time. I'm like noo, I gotta spend as much time with them now when they still love me before they become mean teenagers haha. I don't want to think of how sad I'll feel then with all the I hate yous & just ya know teenager stuff.
I agree. Getting rid of some of my kids stuff can be heart wrenching. I keep small boxes that have a few of my kid's baby clothes in them. When I'm feeling nostalgic, I'll look through the boxes of tiny clothes. They grow up so fast. I don't understand how every year of their life can feel like a few short moments.
Man you got my crying hard with this one. I did the same thing today. She's 8 months old and I feel like the past 8 months went by way too quickly. With every piece I put in a box I just looked at her... there's no way she's this big already. It really is sad to think how quickly they grow. And to think I'm not sure if we'll have another... if she's my only one did I make enough memories, did I love her enough in those first few months. There's so many things I'd want to add to her little life... I love her more than I thought possible. I think we all take so many moments for granted... time to go hug her extra tight!