Monday, 20 June 2011
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Fathers' Day is a Little Stupid
To the population of children and adults who have grown up with loving fathers who have been ever so involved in their lives, Fathers' Day is not stupid.
Fathers' Day is a little stupid because - there is quite a large population of children and adults who have lived their entire lives with deadbeats. Having a celebratory day is only rubbing this in. Living with a deadbeat does not mean these children do not love their deadbeats; it only puts cause for celebration on indefinite hold.
Fathers' Day is a little stupid because - the fathers who are not deadbeats never get what they ask for. While mothers get nice loving cards and thoughtful gifts for Mothers' Day: Fathers' get a manly lunch or a tie with LED lights.
Fathers' Day is a little stupid because - History and Travel takes it upon themselves to get inside a father's head and try to decide what kind of television program they enjoy. I assure you Travel: not all fathers are obsessed with Man V Food.
Fathers' Day is a little stupid because - while a good population of children and adults do not experience deadbeats, they do experience detached fathers who they do not know much about and do not feel an ounce of love radiating from their body.
Thus: Fathers' Day is a Little Stupid.
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About the Author
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- From: GingerAvenger@xanga
- Name: Valerie
- Location: Roanoke, Texas, United States
- About Me: I teach English.
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Comments (120)
YES! Thank you for posting this :) I couldn't agree more!
I lol at this post since I have a "dead beat" mother. My father has been there for me emotionally and showed he loved me, while my mother has always treated me like i am a one dementional thing that is around to entertain her. Even though both of them were addicted to drugs for the majority of my life, my father was never a dead beat dad. He was in and out of prison alot but wrote me letters all the time and talked to me about things that were going on. While my mom was so addicted to crack she left us at my grandmas house and didnt contact/come back for a year. Even though my dad was going through shit and in and out of prison, he ALWAYS was in contact with us. My mom just dumped us on her mom and treated us like we had no feelings and weren't real people.
I understand that you are bitter, but there are shit for mothers out there too.
They make ties with LED lights?
Okay, after much reading and deliberation here's what it comes down to:
1) It's the writers opinion that Father's Day is stupid, you don't have to accept it.
2) Yes, there are deadbeat moms, if I wanted to make that point, I'd probably write on Mother's Day.
3) Yes, you can have a father figure without having a real father around.
Could we maybe tone down the hate and troll comments and for once respect someone's opinion and do something other than criticize it? My bio dad is still in my life, even though my parents are divorced. Do I like him? Not horribly. Did I get him anything on Sunday? Not even.
Whether or not you have a dad is your own trouble or happiness, depending on how it may be. Get over tearing the writer down and just accept the material as-is.
@NuclearSyndrome@xanga - I've witnessed child abuse at my school. Nothing angers me more. You and your brother are in my thoughts.
@caffeinated_mama@xanga - I LOVE my kids! They are all that keep me from becoming a barista; because my second love is coffee.
@QuantumStorm@xanga - Think of me as a Prep School promo.
@GingerAvenger@xanga - Like this? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7uTz-ruEbxE
@QuantumStorm@xanga - I'm a little scared to click that...
@GingerAvenger@xanga - Don't be scared. It's not linked.
By this logic, every holiday that isn't all-inclusive is a little stupid. Christmas is a little stupid. Hanukkah is a little stupid. 9/11 remembrance is a little stupid. So is every person's birthday. Etc.
@GingerAvenger@xanga - I'm glad you love your kids! I've seen so many teachers get tired of teaching and end up being hateful to their students. I have two little girls that I spend time with 24/7 and I need caffeine just to keep up with them! haha
I think Father's Day is worse when you go to church. It's really obvious which families have dads, and the pastor always talks about how God is like your dad unless your dad sucks/ is abusive/ ditched you... in which case God is not like your dad. Then the people with dads go around to the people without them and say, "Aw, Father's Day must be a hard one for you...what are you going to do today?!"
It IS stupid. And that is not to say anything about mothers. My mom sucks too. That's irrelevent. There ARE, granted, a lot more AWOL dads, and the extent of it makes Father's Day a celebration for 25% of families and really painful for the rest. Gee thanks society.
If you don't mind Father's Day, be thankful as hell; don't attack the people who do.
@xhalesx@revelife - oh, i'm super forgetful. honestly, all i planned on getting my dad for father's day was a funny card. the night before i was thinking about it though, and thought he'd really appreciate a nice breakfast. i'm sure your dad loved the time he got to spend with you anyway :)
@vetpet91@xanga - That's usually what I get my dad (a silly card). And I'm sure he appreciated it.
And I'm sure your dad appreciated his breakfast. The way to a man's heart is through his stomach. haha.
@a12906@xanga - and baseball caps.
If that's the case, then, Mother's Day is a little stupid, too. It's a good thing I am not burdened to find both days stupid. :)
I have a deadbeat father who not only left when I was 11, but was never around in the first place. Every time he tried to spend time with me or my brother, he did things he liked because he didn't even know anything about us. Do I knock Father's Day? Not at all.
Father's and Mother's day are about appreciating the things parents do. If they don't do anything, or at least anything that garners appreciation, then don't give them any credit. That seems logical to me. But for the ones who are actually good parents, and who deserve it, one holiday a year is not much to ask.
@yourkbear@xanga - Exactly.
Not just deadbeat moms though... You get those terrible mothers who never get out of their PJ's and stay home all day spanking their kids and watching Oprah.
Yeah... There's plenty of those angels around too.
@Melgaia@xanga - I think it's a problem that people hate dads in this country.
That's my problem with this.
Go ahead and hate your dad if you have a valid reason.. But dads in this country need to stop being disrespected so much.
In comparison to mothers day.. It's pretty damn obvious who we appreciate more and it's really pretty sad.
@looking_inside_me@xanga - Agreed
@xhalesx@revelife - What do you mean by reach out? I'm confused on that.
@Blind_Paraplegic@xanga - I think there is a reason why mothers are appreciated more than fathers. It could be the fact that they carry the baby for nine months and go through the agony of labor. Not to mention, most single parents I know are female as opposed to males. I know a lot more amazing single mothers than single fathers. I think it might have to do with that maternity instinct thing also. It's sad , and I'm sure that there are amazing fathers out there as well.
OP:
I have no problem with this post. I have both really. Dead beats parents to be exact. I find both holidays to be shams as most people don't celebrate it with genuine feelings. Some may but most don't. I know a lot of dead beat parents, dead beat moms and dads. So it goes both way but usually it is the dad that does split. I know a lot of strong and amazing single mothers. Though I don't intend to celebrate this holiday even with my own kids. I tend to think, mothers and fathers should be appreciated all year long as opposed to just one day.
@ohforrealson@xanga -
amen!
I think the concept of these kind of "holidays" is really for those who have practically abandoned their parents in nursing homes and thus, have a "real" reason to actually go visit and spend time with them. It's kind of like how people see a lot more Christians in church on Christmas Eve and Christmas.
the same goes for mother's day too. it's a sad fact that there are mother's out there who could care less about their children.
and who says dads only get ties? my dad got a a really nice, expensive watch from my brother and really nice leather bag from me.
Even as someone who grew up without a father, I don't think Father's Day is stupid. I would have loved to have the type of relationship with my father that would allow me to see Father's Day as a valid holiday. But many people who have amazing relationships with their fathers and therefore the holiday is for them and their fathers. I found it very heart warming to see all my friends with their statuses and changing their profile photos to pictures of the fathers. I don't blame the holiday, I blame the fathers who were too lazy, stupid or chicken to be in their children's lives.
@Hinase@xanga - "I think there is a reason why mothers are appreciated more than fathers."
And I think it's the same reason why women are favored in custody battles (which leads to more single moms)...
And that reason is simply that we prefer women. We're sexist against men.
Are you a moron? You can bash on one day because of SOME people? This isn't a day to celebrate shithead dads, it's a day to appreciate your wonderful father. If you don't have one, sucks to be you, build a bridge and get the fuck over it. The rest of us aren't going to sit here and mope because your life didn't turn out perfectly.