Friday, 17 June 2011
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So You Think I'm Too Fat To Work With Children?
I'm appalled, absolutely appalled right now. As I was just sitting here, chilling on Xanga, I found this post. I am ALMOST speechless, but of course, who has ever known me to be this pissed off and totally speechless?Nobody.
I think perhaps I should start off by saying that I've been working in children's ministry for the past 5 years...and I'm GOOD at it. I love those children, and they know it, all of them, the ones I worked with then, and the ones I work with now. I do my best to be a good role model for them, to the point of getting over my own insecurities so that they don't learn to hate their body like I did.
I still have touch days, but I work every day to recover from my eating disorder FOR THEM so that THEY don't think that's acceptable. I guess I had it wrong, didn't I? In fact, I am the WORST example any kids could ever have, not because I struggle with my desire to self harm, or force myself to throw up, or starve. In fact, these behaviors should be ENCOURAGED.
No, no. I am a bad example because I am OVERWEIGHT. That's right, at 6' 186 lbs and wearing a size 9/10 I am OVERWEIGHT and thus worthless and setting a terrible example for the children. I feel I must give everyone an apology, I mean how dare I interact with kids NOW, much less several years ago when I was a size 18?
It was a horrible thing for me to do, and for that I am sorry. Nobody should ever try to teach children that they are OK, or that they are loved regardless of what they look like. How STUPID of me. I've been spreading lies. Everyone knows that you're only worth something if you fit into the current (thin) ideal of beauty. Eating less than 300 calories per day (and purging even that), and running 5 miles per day (on nothing), THAT is setting a good example for kids.
This is the only version of me children should be exposed to: the starving version with the sunken eyes, freezing cold in the first week of August and the 80 degree weather that goes with it. And me now? Down right offensive! Sorry kids!!!
Honestly, the above is bullshit. Children need those who love them, and they need to learn how to have a healthy spiritual and emotional life as well physical. If you're going to deny these children love because you don't like how the person willing to give it looks, then you are one sick bastard, and once again, you know what to do.
Sincerely,
Christina
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- From: Semper_medusa@xanga
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Comments (44)
Kudos. And hey, that's my name too :)
I worked at a daycare that required the staff to be able to do certain physical activities. During your training week you were "observed" to make sure you could carry out these certain tasks.... which included moving heavy objects, lifting the toddlers to the changing table, running around, and other really random things. I thought it was bull... but hey, I needed a job.
I passed, but one girl in the same training session with me didn't do as well and she was let go by the end of the week. She turned around and sued the daycare for discrimination claiming they fired her because she was overweight.
I don't know how the lawsuit ended, but I thought BOTH sides were wrong. The company should have just asked if we were capable of doing these activities, and if the applicants couldn't do so then they shouldn't have hired them. I don't think the girl had a point to sue the company because it wasn't exactly because she was overweight... it was because she failed their "training" that everyone went through. Yes, it was dumb training... but I don't believe it was enough to sue them.
I feel that adults who work with kids need to have a high amount of energy and should be able to by physically active. That doesn't NOT mean they need to be skinny. As long as they can keep up with the kids they are watching their size shouldn't matter.
Amen! I totally agree with you!
agreed!!
I love the last pic. Most people who read that other post were disgusted by the ignorance of it.
Kids need someone fun and entertaining. Yes, you should be able to take care of them and chase after them, but it shouldn't matter if you're a size 2 or a size 20 as long as you can do your job.
I think that the post you were referring to was a little misstated. I think she was referring more to "fat and lazy" childcare providers, rather than just more physical appearance. Specifically, a camp counselor making the kids hike while they drive.
An overweight worker who doesn't participate in physical activities and healthy eating with the kids IS setting a bad example and shouldn't be working in that job. An overweight worker who does participate in physical activity and eats the same (or healthier) than the kids is setting a good example about both body image and a healthy lifestyle.
"Everyone knows that you're only worth something if you fit into the current (thin) ideal of beauty. Eating less than 300 calories per day (and purging even that), and running 5 miles per day (on nothing), THAT is setting a good example for kids."
This is not cool ^
It sounds like you're referring to people with eating disorders like anorexia and bulimia, and these are SERIOUS ILLNESSES.
It's nothing to be messing around, about.
Those type of people are NOT HEALTHY, they are ILL, and they do not deserve to be treated with derision..
I can tell you are being sarcastic, but I find it offensive none the less that you are making light of other people's suffering.. that's pretty fudged up.
Anyways, it probably sounds like I'm flying off the handle, but I've known people with these type of eating disorders, and it's heartbreaking to watch what they're going through.
And to be honest.. being obese or thin to the point of where it's a health-hazard are equal.. neither is worse than the other. If you're going to be freaking disgusted at people who only eat enough to barely survive, than you might as well be disgusted at people who stuff their face until they are obese, too.. ain't really no difference..
Can I say that you're beautiful ;)
you're amazing <3
I dont have a problem with your weight, however I do have a problem with your outward appearance in the last photo. I would surely hope my children's ministry leader wouldn't walk around with her middle finger up.....TOTAL FAIL ON YOUR PART.
I agree with all of what you said but I do agree that there should be a srt code such as you must be able to lift I couldn't do the work you do because I have a bad back and I can not lift but that does not mean some one that can't lift couldn't take care of older children. I enjoyed your post until the last picture then well to me that is not a good role model.
@mydearparker@xanga - I completely agree with you. People should be able to work with kids, which means running around, standing for long periods of time, bending down to their level, and be quick on their feet. Working with kids can be a hard workout (sometimes), but nobody should discriminate against another based on appearances.
As long as the person can work well with kids, why should looks even matter? Kids don't seem to care at all.
They only care if you love them.
♥
I think there are ways of looking at this subject in a healthy manner. I am a grandmother who frequents playing parks with my grand daughter, and I'm appalled at the number of fat children I see. These parents are abusive, and should be ashamed because of what will come down the road to these precious children. It's not about not loving your fat. It's about diabetes, heart disease, neuropathy, and a host of other problems associated with unhealthy choices parents are making for their children. Literally appalling.
The last photo your posted, in my opinion, totally ruined the good meaning of your post.
Why stoop to such a low level as flipping the bird?
@kbthor01@xanga -
Agree 100%
@Cosmar@xanga - The post is written sarcastically, and if you read it you'll know the author is saying she herself suffered from an eating disorder...
@Cosmar@xanga - Umm i think your confused. The author herself has experienced an eating disorder.... she is expressing her anger at being discriminated against currently for her weight, not condoning eating disorders.
@Cosmar@xanga - Sounds like somebody didn't read this thoroughly. You would've caught on that this is sarcasm, and that the author also had her struggles with eating disorders. Try again.
I think the post on healthkicker was poorly titled (and some parts poorly worded). In the end she was asking for a physical to ensure people can keep up with activities. That can include people who are overweight; the one instructor at my kenpo class is slightly overweight and he's a 4th degree black belt. My friend who works with children as a Zoo educator is slightly overweight and she was deemed healthy by her physician at a recent check up. It's not like she was suggesting that everyone gets the circumference of their stomach measured and go from there. I'm sure you would get a bill of good health, given you are prone to activity and are not unhealthy!
Her suggestions should have been to a.) ensure that camp counselors do not bring outside food, b.) encourage physical activity at camp and c.) hire counselors that can keep up with said activity. I think that would be a reasonable charge. I worked at a daycare/camp while I was in college and some of the women who worked with me were overweight. They still were able to keep up with the activities required of them so I'm sure under such demands they would still keep their jobs!
I have to agree with @HopeWithinReach@xanga. The entire post is very nice, but the ending photos of you flipping the bird and standing in front of a mirror with little clothing on just makes the entire thing appear to be an angsty, immature temper tantrum instead of a mature rebuttal.
And in response to the other post, I thing you read a little too into what the girl was saying. From what I read, she was merely making a comment of how a childcare provider's habits of laziness can be very detrimental to a child. The entire post is simply stating that childcare providers need to be more aware of their actions when dealing with impressionable children.
Should she have retitled the post to something less inflammatory? Yes, the title of "Help! My Camp Counselor is Overweight!" can be taken as very offensive. However, the article is much less hurtful than the title would make it seem. A title is meant to capture one's attention and create a conversation, and obviously it has done it's job.awesome, amazing, fabulous post ♥
I was completely disgusted with the post about the camp counselor being overweight, and felt just as angry as you seem. Everything was perfect about what you said. That chick was seriously screwed up in her thinking and I'm so glad someone decided to write a post about it.
Good for you :D
You are gorgeous and you're completely right. "Being too fat" for anything is a sad excuse. Keep up the fight!
Like I said in the first post, it's the responsibility of the GUARDIANS to set a good example for their children. Camp counselors and childcare providers should also act as a good example, but at the end of the day it all boils down to who the children go home to at night. If they aren't setting limits and watching what they feed their children, it's on them.
Who cares if a counselor or childcare provider is on the heavier (or lighter) side as long as they do their job right? I've seen my fair share of both in the three years that I've been working at summer camps, and they have been some of the nicest people I've known and were fantastic with the kids.
Whoever said "fat" counselors are terrible people can go shit in a hat.
While I understand where you're coming from, you are grossly overreacting. The other post was only saying that camp counselors should be able to participate in the physical activities that their campers are required to do - at least, that's what I got out of it. And I agree with that. I think that it is important to practice what you preach. At most camps, that is physical activity. For you, working in ministry, it is essential to teach love and acceptance. As you said, everyone should be teaching love and acceptance. The writer of the other post never said that all teachers and every single person who works with children should be thin.
Also, I'm offended at your accusation that anyone who is thin is unhealthy or has an ED. Honestly, I found your post much more offensive. I am neither thin nor fat. I am average in every sense of the word. But according to you, my sister, who IS thin, MUST be "eating less than 300 calories a day and purging even that." In reality, my sister is an extremely healthy human being who eats like any normal person. She plays varsity soccer and goes for daily runs. She is comfortable in her body and has never in her life starved herself.
I understand your point, but you could have made it without implying that everyone who is smaller than you has an ED. Like I said, IMO, your post is more hurtful than the other one. I get what you are trying to say, and I agree with you... I just don't like how you said it.