Monday, 06 June 2011
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Abandoned in the Heat
So last night I was watching the news and there was a story on there about a three year old dying in an enclosed car. The child had been left outside in a locked car for over eight hours. It was a family friend who forgot about the child. Then the news showed statistics from the last few years of how many incidents have occurred when children had been left locked inside a car and how many of those incidents resulted in death.
From last year there were over 600 cases. How could someone forget a child in a car for over eight hours? I can't even imagine what the child must have gone through...the report on the news said in that situation, being locked in rising heat, was torture. I believe it. My heart mourns for that small child. It's just not fair, and I couldn't even imagine being the mother of the child. How can you cope with something like that?
I feel weird leaving my kids in the car just to pay for gas at the gas station. I wonder what goes through people's heads. What are they doing that they forget a child is in the car...and for hours? I could see going inside and being like "oh wait...the kid" but all day?
What do you think about this? Have you ever forgotten a child somewhere? What do you think was going on for them to forget the child?
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- From: lemons_to_lemonade@xanga
- Name: lemons_to_lemonade
- Location: New Orleans, Louisiana, United States
- About Me: I say what I mean, and I mean what I say. I'm usually for the most part pretty honest. If you want to know something then ask, but don't get mad if you don't like the answer. Life is too short to go through it unhappy, and if you figure out how to do that please let me know. I'm sarcastic and sometimes upfront and rude, but every question deserves an answer. I'm tired of giving people what they want. I'm constantly searching for an answer when I'm not even quite sure what the question is. I firmly believe that if you don't stand for something, you'll fall for anything. And I don't think I should be the one to have to change to make someone else happy. This is me, take it or leave it.
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Comments (38)
Yeah...honestly I never like leaving my kids in the car for gas either. I have no idea how you could forget about a kid, especially for so long.
I've seen news stories where cars were jacked with the kids in the back seat while the mom or dad was paying for gas.
Just recently on the news someone left their kid in the car for FOURTEEN hours.... Of course he died.. Its so sad... I dont have kids, but I worry so much about my kitties I dont think I'd forget about my kids! I worry way too much for something like that...
I find it hard to believe anyone could forget a child in the car but sometimes parents do get overwhelmed or are dealing with an extremely stressful situation. I saw once on a news show that if you see a child alone in a parked car on a warm sunny day, you should try and get them out (by breaking a window) even before you call the police, because it only takes like 30 minutes for the car to get hot enough to kill the child.
It's almost 90 degrees here in Kansas. When I get in the car, it's SO hot. I can barely tolerate the heat long enough for it to cool off. In the summer, I always open my car doors and turn on the A/C before I even put my kids in the car.
I don't know how anyone could leave a kid like that... I mean to just "forget" them? I don't know how they can just forget their child! You would think after a few minutes of not seeing them/hearing them, they would realize, "OH SHIT! I forgot him in the car!" Bad parenting..... I can't even imagine being left in a car like that..... ;(
it happened soooo much when I was living in az. i would hear at least weekly the horrible report on the tv. I don't get it either how someone could forget their kid in the car.
It's heartbreaking and awful... and very hard to understand. My husband is much like most people, saying "how could someone forget their kids in the car. It's unexcusable". I agree... to an extent. I remember seeing a mother interviewed, after leaving her child in the car, which resulted in death, and she said she just truly forgot. Hearing her story was hearbreaking... and I believed her. I still do. She didn't seem like the type to do it intentionally and she didn't seem like a "bad mom".
Like I said, it's hard to understand and I don't know how people can forget, but I believe in SOME cases, people truly do forget and it really is an accident and it's just so tragic... for everyone involved. I couldn't imagine being stuck in a hot car like that and I couldn't imagine being the parent that accidently does that too them. Just awful!
I dont believe that ANYONE in their right mind could possibly forget their kid in the car. I think these parents are doing it on purpose and saying it was an accident to get less prison time. If it actually was an accident the parents must have been doped up or trashed. I dont see how anyone could leave the person they carried around for 9 months, gave birth to, been caring for, and love so much. Heck, I dont even think a babysitter could forget a child in a car. SMH.
I think some one has to be completely gone and out of place to forget a child in a car for more then 5 min. It's sad and truly heartbreaking!
There are a lot of psychological issues that can just pop up and screw with people with out them knowing it was their... This story is just really sad.
I'd never be able trust that family friend again, even if they intentionally forgot.
I could never imagine forgetting a child in the car. I won't even leave my dog in my car let alone a child.
I know some parents can forget about their children, but if you don't notice that your kid is gone for more than an hour, what the hell?
One kid got left behind at the restaurant I work at and the parent came back sobbing. She felt so bad for leaving her child, and the child was just terrified! He didn't know his phone number and we couldn't understand what he said when he said his last name, either, so all we could do was wait. It was only ten minutes, but I bet it was the longest ten minutes of his life.
I can understand how someone could forget their child in the car. I've heard stories where routine was broken and a parent was supposed to take their child to daycare when they normally drive straight to work. Baby's in the backseat sleeping peacefully and you forget you were even supposed to go to the daycare in the first place and it just seems like a normal day when you arrive at work. Plus, we've all had that experience where we've done something so automatically that we can't even remember doing it. You're so deep in thought during that drive to work that you barely remember how you even got there. Many people have such busy lives that they can't slow down enough to think about the details.
It's tragic but I don't think its malicious.
@lifeonacitybusem4@xanga - I heard a story on the news where that happened to one woman. She never forgave herself for doing it either. They suggest keeping your purse in the back seat when you drive that way when you stop you have to reach into the back seat and if you do forget the kid is there you will be reminded.
Personally I struggle with guilt just when I pump the gas. I roll the windows down and turn on the a/c before putting my daughter in the van, and I keep a blanket covering her car seat buckle when we're not in the van so that it doesn't get too hot and burn her when she gets in her seat.
I won't even leave my (18 month old) son in the car when I walk 10 feet away to pay for gas. You just never know if someone's going to pick THOSE 30 seconds to break into your car. Call me paranoid if you want; it's worth it for peace of mind.
They are irresponsible people who should be locked up in a car for a day in the hot sun. I don't think they would ever do it again.
I've seen some cases on Court t.v., or, In Session, and it seems our world has changed since I was a mother of small children. The frantic scheduling that takes place on a daily basis is crucial. I saw on court case where the mother had her routine changed for one day. She didn't usually have the baby, but that day she did. She made numerous stops for errands on her way to a very busy job, where she got out of the car and went to work. The day care did not call as soon as one would expect, thinking she must have been home that day, so by the time they called, it was afternoon. It was a heartbreaking case. At first I was furious with the mother, then I watched the testimony. It was gut wrenching, and her husband wholly forgave her. For a month after the death of the baby, the family was giving her sips of fluid and toileting her, as she was so grief stricken. When our daily routines become so frenetic we need to reassess. Is it really more important to do all those extra things, and have a bigger home? Or, is it possible for some to scale down, even to a smaller mobile home, and stay home a bit longer, or, part time? Too many things on our brains these days. We need to slow down.
I honestly dont know how people can be so careless. I have always been a watchful person and kept my eye on children no matter where I am wether it be the movies the store or out fishing. It upsets me when people lock their pets in a hot car I would freak out if I saw a child left in a car. I have called the police a few times on hot days it amazes me people will go out to eat at a resturaunt and leave their dogs in the car for an hour when its 90 degrees outside! A car gets a lot hotter than the outside air use your freakin brain people.
There was a news report about a year or two ago about a woman who left her child in her hot car while she went to work that day and ended up remembering and coming out to find the child dead. She was being pressed with charges but honestly I think the horror of remembering/realizing you left your child in the car and them dying is the worst punishment :( so sad
I used to stay with my grandpa and sometimes I'd fall asleep while running errands with him and he'd leave me in the car (I don't think he could physically pick me up due to some health issues) to nap with the doors wide open. Best naps ever. I'd wake up kinda sweaty with a warm summer breeze flowing through.
It's horrible, but when I lived in Arizona, that would happen all the time. The babies fall asleep during the ride and the mom forgets that she even brought the kid with her because she's stressed and sleep deprived and the kid isn't making any noise. Out of sight, out of mind.
I feel really bad for these mothers.
We've never forgot, but after getting our new van our twins were locked in the van in Arizona in the beginning of summer. We called AAA and 911. AAA actually got there before the fire department did and got them out extremely quickly. The fire department showed up about 2 minutes later. One of the scariest things my husband and I had to deal with. Our kids were freaking out and we just wanted to get them out.
my father's friend worked on a case where i man left his newborn baby in the car for just one hour on a sweltering summer day. "the baby was cooked from the inside out," he said.
I don't have kids yet, but have been temporarily nannying for friends with a 4-year-old and 1-year-old. Accidentally locking my keys in the car with them inside is one of my biggest fears even though the 4-year-old could probably figure out how to let me in. I usually try to roll a window down enough that I could unlock it from the outside. My car is extremely hard to get into (AAA had to tow it 40 minutes and get a professional locksmith when my keys got locked in a couple years ago). If it were hot with kids inside, I'd have them put a hole in a window.
I have forgotten important things before, so I guess it could happen, but it's hard to imagine how. I do imagine that in most of these cases, the people responsible felt horrible.
I used to wonder how people could forget their kids too, til I forgot mine. My husband and I went to drop off my car at the shop to get worked on. We had dropped our older two kids off at home and kept the baby with us since she was sleeping. She was riding with me. We parked side by side at the shop and I ran in to drop the keys off. I talked to the technician for a couple of minutes then headed to my husbands car to go home. I had completely forgotten the baby was in my car and only (thank God) realized it when I went to lock the slider of my van. Since it was broken it had to be locked manually. I opened the door and there she was sleeping soundly still. It was a very warm day and I am SOO glad I had a few angels looking out for her. I'm not so sure I would have remembered she was in the car until after we had arrived home.
It just makes me sick to my stomach to be honest. And i don't know how i could cope with knowing a "family friend" left my baby in the car. Unless she has serious health issues or something i don't see how you could just "forget" a child. It's bullshit.