Saturday, 15 January 2011
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Potty Training: Getting Started?
Well, after many months of putting it off, due to the fiasco it was the first time around, we're getting ready to start the potty training again.
Now that she's practically 2 and a half, and we haven't made ANY headway. It's a little overwhelming.
There were... certain things I dreaded about parenting, before I became a parent. Potty training, being one of them. Ugh. At first, I thought she was going to be one of those lucky kids (or, wait, we would have been the lucky ones! lol), who would get easily potty trained. She seemed to enjoy copying everything we did. Obviously, that didn't happen.
Now, I just WISH, she would EXPRESS the need to go potty, but I realize she... just can't yet? I don't know. She won't TELL me when she needs to go. I have to guess. Me guessing, is always too late. By the time the diaper is off, I realize it's just been recently soaked and... well, where do you go from there?
I did buy her an Sesame Street little potty seat thing. She likes sitting on the big potty, vs. the little potty chair. Hey, I'm fine with that! I thought that seeing Elmo and his friends would get her a little more motivated! It's worked... so far! She grabbed it, came to me and said "bobbie" (her word for potty, even though we also have an Aunt Bobbie and that's why I get easily confused as well), so I quickly got it on, sat her on it and then she said "book" and I read her books to get her relaxed. It did not result in pee in the toilet, but at least she sat on the thing for about 10 minutes. That's progress!
(Although, wouldn't you know. I let her hold on to this potty seat in Target today, to keep her occupied, and she literally pulled off the toilet lock for it and it's now who knows where! I'll admit, that frustrated me!)
Anyway, I hope I can find my potty training book soon. I need some...help. I'm no good at this. At all.
I wish I could have another mom friend come and train me how to do all this stuff. Oh, and we did buy those pull up things, too. They have a toy story design that has a design, in the middle, that fades when it gets wet. I told her about it and said "So, let mommy know when you have to go potty, so we can keep the picture on there. Okay?" and she said "Yeah" and shook her head. Didn't work.
Any tips/suggestions/encouragement?
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- From: Brilliant_Innocence@xanga
- Name: Megan
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Comments (26)
Put her on the potty first thing in the morning, then after breakfast, then midmorning, after lunch, midafternoon/after nap, after dinner, and before bed. Also, every time she goes in her diaper, put her on the potty & tell her "Pee (or poo) goes in the potty." It's worked well for my daughter. Worked well for our son, too... until he decided he just didn't care.
Im in the same situations. Well almost. My son is only 15months and I know its a bit young to start but I figured I try it for a week to see if he can grasp the idea of it. He seems to notice that he has gone potty in his diaper or dislike the changing part. Well it hasnt been fun to get him to sit on it yet, Like I said I know its a little young to get him to potty train especially being a boy, its said they are harder to train =). But I figured why not try. Someone told me to put him in underwear because pull ups/diapers confuse them. I dont know if thats true but Im not going to try either since he is so young. Maybe if he does well than we will but not at this point. I also was given the advice to sit them on the potty every hour for about 10-15 min at a time. Hope that helps and Ill let you know if it works for me. Keep it up and Im sure she will grasp it.
I'm in the same situation. My daughter is two and a half and we are only FINALLY making some headway. I admit, I haven't been trying very hard. BUT, last night she did go poop on the potty! It was exciting. Thing is, she didn't tell me. We were over at my sister-in-laws and she told her Auntie she had to go on the potty. So... sometimes I think she just won't go with me because it's me. You know? Because my daughter KNOWS she shouldn't be going in her pants. She hides when she makes a bowel movement. Idk.. it's coming along, but I'm really starting to feel the pressure, because I don't want two kids in diapers come May >.<
Dont Worry my little girl was nearer 3 when she was potty trained, they need to be fully ready. If they are talking and communicating well it helps. Just put them in pants and cheap tracksuit bottoms, they will soon learn that its not nice having wet trousers and pants. It will probably take 2 weeks of constant changing and lots of praise, keep at it.
Hope this helps. : )My mother used different methods for both myself and my brother. I happened to be one of those kids that just took to the potty. My brother, however, fought it tooth and nail. Even "watching Daddy" didn't work for him. Finally she had to take to bribing. I know it sounds bad, but when you think of psychology (cause and affect, action and reward) it worked to at least get him started. She would take him through the motions, timing his potty time relatively with his feedings, etc. She would then put a bag of M&Ms on the shelf above the toilet and if he went potty correctly, even if it was just a little trickle of pee, he would get rewarded with an M&M. Soon, after warming up and getting the hang of it, he would start to mimic her "Have to Potty" and eventually he did it out of habit and necessity, not for a reward. So I suppose another thing you can try is find the one thing that she loves (a favorite desert or snack that she doesn't get every day works well) and reward her with it...in your voice and action, make it a game that she can grab a hold of and mimic.
Lose the diapers! Seriously, just let her run around naked or with just some easy up and down pants for few days and she'll be able to tell exactly when she's gone and what it felt like. That's what we did with my daughter when she was 16 months and now she's 17 months and completely trained for pee. We still use diapers for going out and sleep, but she knows when to go potty and will even go sit on the potty by herself if she doesn't have pants on.
I got my daughter, who was 2.5 at the time, potty trained in a few days. I stopped the pullups and went to underwear. That was the big thing, I would lose the diapers/pullups. We also did a potty chair because it was easier for her to use independently as I had a 2 month old I was dealing with too. I was also off of work so I had lots of time to deal with her. In the first days, I would have her just wear a tshirt and underwear so she would be able to go easier.
here is what we have tried:
stickers NEGATIVE
candy (can't believe I did it) NEGATIVE
being bare bum NEGATIVE
And I just won't do the bribes. Children should not be bribed for doing something natural. Do you get treats every time you use the toilet?
Our monkey turned 3 in September and he does not care about potty learning. (very typical for a 1st born boy).
You know the only thing that ACTUALLY works for him?
A timer. I have a small timer set for 45 min and when it goes off, he goes potty. Boom. Works.
Yes the pull ups work, DO NOT use "easy ups" they are awful and are worse then diapers.
If you can, get some absorbent training pants (you can buy them where you buy cloth diapers, they are just underpants with padding).
And then go to Babys R Us and buy "The Potty Watch". You can set it to go off every half hour, 45 min or hour and it sings to remind them to go potty. (thus they no longer have to listen to mommy nagging "potty time" which drives even me crazy) They are only about $10. (the only reason we don't have one is because we can't get to the US to buy one yet).
Just remember, children are not cookie cutter and maybe she is just not ready yet.
The more pressure you put on her, the longer it will take.
My daughter was very easy to potty train. She was eager and excited to be a big girl and was potty trained by 2 years old. My son however is 2 1/2 and wants NOTHING to do with the potty. He actually gets very upset and mad when you ask him if he wants to go on the potty. I have been told that boys work a little different but its getting a little frustrating. My doctor told me that he will let us know when he is ready so we just talk about it for now and try to encourage him. He also said that using candy and food as a tool to potty train isn't a good idea because they will develop a un healthy relationship with food by doing that. I think I will try what LadyGwenivere said with the timer set every 45 min. That sounds like it is a pretty good idea. GOOD LUCK!
I trained my son at 25 months--and it took a few days of complete dedication--but we haven't looked back! I used the "3 Day Method" which is a great method (in my opinion!) if you are interested--I have an e-book that I can email you that outlines the method and has some great helpful hints on potty training/positive reinforcement! Just message me your email address and I can send it!! :) Good Luck!
@LadyGwenivere@xanga - How'd you get this timer method to work? Did you make it like a game or do you put him on the potty yourself? I'm not to potty training quite yet, but I'm trying to be mentally prepared. :P
potty training... yuck! my son is only 11 months old but i dred the day we start. i would do the timer method. thats what i did when i worked as a babysitter... every 2 hrs like clock work we went potty no matter what you had to sit on the potty and try. it took about 6 months but we werent trying to force him to go. i also dont believe in bribs but if its the only thing that works go for it!
@milfncookies@xanga - it was really easy. I just got an ordinary kitchen timer that remembers the last time you put in, set it for 45 min (though we have now changed it to an hour) and told our monkey "when the time goes off, its time to potty". And we have a little potty at the bottom of the stairs (because our only bathroom is at the top and he can use the little one by himself). The first two or three times I remind him "ok babe, lets go potty" and he goes. Sometimes nothing, but I do NOT make him sit for 15 min that is way too long. We use the 1 min per year of age, so 3 min. And if nothing, then its back to playing. If he pees, he gets 1 sticker, if he poops he gets 2. And when he is done I restart the timer and we go again. By the 3rd time the timer goes off he is off to the potty himself. It works, even with pull ups. He just needs the little non-mommy reminder, which it typical boy.
The Potty Watch that i mentioned in my 1st comment is actually a timer for the child. It sings to remind the child to go potty, and I know day care workers and parents who swear by them. It also increases Independence because the child will be reminded by the watch, not nagged by mom (I really want to get one but we have to go to the US to buy them).
Eh, i understand.. am right now there. My son is going to be 2 in March this year and it is due time that he is learning the purpose of a toilet. he has been watching his big brother and daddy going which always seems to fazed him.
it is also one of the parentings I do not enjoy. though, if i recalled with my first two children, it was quick process even though it took a long time. and honestly? i enjoyed those days of no diapers!!!! forgot what it was like having diaper days until my third child was born and began to remember those white things. *sigh* never really cared for those diapers. good luck!! hope you find some good and great tips. I remember suggesting a friend of mine long before i had kids to encourage her child to potty in little seat, by rewarding her a candy. it works for that little critter.I'm sharing your pain although my little man is 3 and a half. I have tried EVERYTHING. Different potties, potty seats, underware, pull ups, and training pants. Nothing is helping and I'm getting very depressed. We have countless potty videos that he LOVES to watch and still nothing. I have tried prizes and treats, M&M's and a potty chart. I don't understand it. This too was one of the parents woes I wasn't looking forward to.
My mom put food coloring in the toilet water for me (I'm a girl) and food coloring and cheerios (to aim at) for my brother.
@toodles103@xanga - my sister swears by that method. It worked wonderfully for her boys. I used parts of it for mine.
My son was 3-1/2 and we were on our 3rd round before it worked. He was considered a "reluctant potty trainer" and these are what finally got him to do it:
~No more diapers. Yes, there were a lot of messes to clean up, but....
~Make the child clean it up (with your guidance, being sure to wash their hands really well when done....we even had him scrubbing carpet cleaner for "pet stains" into the carpeted areas he went on).
~Don't make a big deal about it. It's just another part of life. No happy dances or special songs or candy for success, and don't let the child see how frustrated you are when a mess is made...try to not let yourself feel it in the first place. "Uh-oh! Peepee is for the toilet. You need to clean that up, here are the paper towels and a soapy washcloth."
~For my son, a sticker chart was helpful, and yes, I put a fancy fire truck toy on a top shelf that he had to earn by going a whole week without a mess. It was an honestly great motivator...Bribing is one thing, teaching your children to earn things is another. A lot of that is how you approach it with the child.
I'm now trying to work up the motivation to start with my second child. Good luck to you!
Potty training is not something I've even thought about. It's daunting to think about. I haven't a clue where I'd start, plus all the conflicting sides about it on the "psychology" sides (I mean, "biased egotistical compensating for their own childhood" sides, most of the time when it comes to parenting-psychology people).
@LadyGwenivere@xanga - Haha, you think using a toilet is natural? I would love to see a herd/grove of wild toilets just waiting to be used!
@Mangonese@xanga - yes elimination of waste in the body is very natural. We as humans use a toilet, at least in this part of the world we do. Its a whole other story in parts of the world where they live differently then we do here.
Bribe her. My sister and brother in law were having a hard time with my nephews. I dont have any kids but I still know how I think about these type of things. I said "Bribe him" My sis said "With what". I said "candy, chocolate" "If he goes properly he gets chocolate". So she tried it that day... and guess what. It worked like a charm. They did that for the other two boys as well. Each time it worked.
I have 4 nieces and nephews. My brother and sister never waited for their kids to express the need to go. They put them on the potty at regular intervals during the day, whether they needed to go or not, so that they'd get used to sitting on it and keeping their diaper dry. If you wait for a kid to tell you, it wont work out so well and the process will take longer.
What my dad did, and this really worked, was he sat me down on the toilet and told me that's where I was supposed to go potty. Then he took off my diaper and let me run around with nothing but a T-shirt on and as soon as I felt that pee trickling down my leg, I did NOT like at all! And then I started listening to him and using the big-girl potty
My oldest turned 3 in October, and she is still not potty trained! She will go potty just about every time she sits on the toilet, but she won't tell us when she has to go. She also refuses to poop on the potty! I say the daycare is partially to blame; they wouldn't start potty training her until she moved into a certain class, so she was already 3 before they would even work on potty training while she was there. It didn't matter how much we worked on it at home because she would just go in her Pull-Up at daycare, and they didn't care. Now, she'll stay dry all day long at daycare (they use the bathroom every 2 hours), but when she gets home and we ask her to use the potty, she sometimes throws a temper tantrum. When she does stay dry, she will sit on the potty and pee, but as soon as she has her Pull-Up back on, that's when she poops.
My parents use to put me in the toilet and they'd feed me until I pooped. Of course not constant feeding but just sitting for a long time conditions a baby to use the toilet since its the only choice. I was potty trained before I learned how to talk. It saved so much on diapers.
@yourkbear@xanga - my cousin in the same way and he didn't start pooping in the potty until he was almost 5. He would actually ask my aunt for a pull up so he could poop. Its a comfort thing, they will grow out of it. But our monkey turned 3 in Sept and he just doesn't care about using the potty. I am not worried yet, the timer method is working really well. I am also pretty surprised at the daycare not taking her more then every 2 hours. The place our monkey goes takes them every 45min to an hour, and right after snacks/meals/naps. Maybe you could make a request that she be taken more often?
@SAHM_and_student@xanga - have things gotten any better with your little man? Its gotten slightly better here... but not much.