For some reason the fatigue that plagued me all of my first semester has reared it's ugly head yet again. But my appetite has been ferocious. In fact at my appointment last week, the doc had to tell me to slow down the weight gain if it was possible.
I gained 7-8 lbs in a span of 4 weeks and since then, I've gained another 2 lbs. I think I've just been food deprived in the first few months that I'm indulging myself a little too much too frequently. I know I do have to watch my diet and eat as healthy as I can. I've never been a very healthy eater, I don't do the organic, all natural, wheat bread over white, light this and light that, blah blah blah. But I think I really should consider it again.
I've gotten used to the fact that I don't get more than 2-3 hours of sleep at a time. I try to cut fluids down after a certain time of night, but it really doesn't help. The slightest feeling of the urge to pee, I have to go or else I feel a feeling of impending doom. People say that it's nature's way of getting mom-to-be's prepared for those late night feedings/changing/crying.
I've been thinking a lot of my maternity leave.
At my job I'm able to take up to 9 months unpaid maternity leave. But most people just take 3 months since the 9 months come with conditions that are pretty unfavorable if you love your position. The thing that sucks is that all maternity leave is unpaid at my work.
I still can't believe that the US is one of only a handful of countries that don't have some form of mandatory paid maternity leave. I think the other countries were Lesotho, Papua New Guinea and Swaziland. That is so unacceptable. Those three months that I'm off to care for the new baby is going to be a huge strain on the pockets. Does anyone know if there is some kind of short term disability that might help cover something?
I have my 20 week scan coming up on 11/2. We'll get to find out the sex of the baby soon. It's not that it's super important, especially since it can't be altered anyone but I would love to know what to get for the baby. And for some reason, once people find out you're pregnant all they can ask is if it's a boy or girl. The answer "I don't know" is like sooo disappointing to them.
I've started to do research on baby products. Is there any websites that moms go to for reviews and/or recommendations. It's like a mission trying to navigate all these sites. The varieties, choices, colors, features of car seats, strollers, bottles, nipples, cribs are dizzying. It's no wonder the business of baby is a multi-billion dollar industry.
I might not know yet which model of what car seat I want yet, but I know I've been trying really hard to stay within a budget. Lately, I've taken a long, hard look at the parenting philosophy I want to adopt.
At this day and age it's so easy for parents to throw their disposable income pampering their children. But I want to be able to separate the necessities vs the luxuries that will become like necessities if you let it. It's hard to say I'm not going to get the big and the best for your children, because as my parents say every reasonable parent will want to provide their children with an experience that was better than their own. I had better than my parents, my parents had better than my grandparents which had better than my great grandparents. It's a cardinal rule.
But I don't want to raise my children to know a sense of blinded entitlement that I see so many children these days have. I see it in my young cousins...cell phones at 9, all the game systems collecting dust, dogs that they can't take care of.
I was lucky that my parents were there to give us their time, affection, love and material things. But I'm not blind to the fact that there is a part of my upbringing that lends to my inexplicable hoarding of all things materialistic. Somehow I want my children to be better that me in that respect. So it's not that I don't want to give them the best and the most, but I think it's important to also teach them at a young age that you don't have to always keep up with the Joneses.
As husband says, our job in this world now is not to give them everything they want, but to give them the tools so that they can get whatever they want in the long term.
It's not to say that this is going to be easy, especially as first time parents. All these bells and whistles are marketed to seem like they are the bells and whistles that are absolute necessities and that if you didn't get them you're a horrific parent. I must learn to focus on what is best for our budget. The only thing you don't sacrifice is safety and education for your children. I don't know. I'll see how I fair. Let's hope I don't get sucked in.
Did you deal with any of these issues during your pregnancy? What things are/were on your mind?