I'm going to be honest about it. I want to be able to be completely open with my kids about who I am, who I've been, and steps that brought me to where I currently stand. I don't want my kids to wonder about me, or to think that if they'd had all the information, they would have chosen a different path. Some of the best discussions I've had with my mom have been the ones where we really open up and talk about personal things together, even if it feels slightly uncomfortable at first.

My man and I make a great team, and I'm so happy to be with him partly because of that. I was a wild child who wanted to do and see it all, and he was a more reserved type who has still never touched a single drug or cigarette and never will. So our kids will get the benefit of both our experiences--the choice to get a little crazy and try a few things (I've made the choice not to smoke or do drugs, but it doesn't mean I haven't tried them), or the choice to live a life completely free of those things. My SO's life is more that of a good role model, while mine is somewhat of a cautionary tale--but I think both are effective examples for our kids.

Well, thankfully I didn't do drugs or drink until I was of legal age.  And while I did do stupid things like lie to my parents, I never did anything bad enough that I would have a problem telling my kids.  I do think that if I had, though, honesty would be the best policy.

:SIGH:

I'm not sure how I'll react to that question... I have a pretty bad past that kind of lingers in the shadows every day, I'd hate for my kids to see their mother in that way. Maybe I won't have kids though..

Me at 14: "Dad did you do any drugs?" My dad: "I've done many drugs.. just don't do LSD"

well.. kid, dont do drug! or you'll be dying like me.

I know that my mother being honest about her past drug experience helped me stay moderate in my own experimentation.  Sure, I still tried them and some could point to that as a failure on her part or mine. However while other kids were going crazy in their rebellion against what they viewed as tyrannical lying parents I was always the voice of reason.  I was the one who had one drink and then waited three hours before driving.  I was always the kid who said "Do you have a safe ride, do you have a safe place to stay? Oh, then you better not take that."  I had heard the honest stories of times when friends of my mother either were hurt or barely dodged a metaphorical bullet.

Someday when I have kids I'll tell them about how I don't regret my high-school experimentation, but how I wish I had waited until I was a little older.  I'll tell them that it is dangerous, and about the times I could have been seriously hurt. I'll tell them about my dead friends, whom they will never meet because of drug abuse. I'll tell them that I would really rather they didn't do those things and that as a parent I can't allow them, but I'll also tell them that they have to make their own mistakes and although I'd be disappointed if they followed my same mistakes, I will always love them.

I think parents are in a tough spot, you can't give them permission because you know it is dangerous, but you know they will do what they want.  Whether they do drugs or not will ultimately be their choice, and you don't want them to go behind your back, but you can't let them do it in front of you.  I think it's just important for parents to realize they can't force their children to do or not to do anything.  You have to guide them and make rules, establish punishments, but you also have to teach them how to handle their mistakes and then deal with the consequences.  I think a good analogy is a child taking a cookie from a jar.  They know they will get in trouble, but sometimes it's worth it anyway.  When I have kids I plan to put a bigger emphasis on avoiding mistakes and dealing with that consequences when they do make them, rather than shielding them from all danger.

It is, because if you lie then you're adding dishonesty to the hypocrisy. :p But, honestly, its not really hypocritical if you honestly see what you did as a mistake and you don't want your children to repeat it. Deciding what to say to kids and teens when it comes to talking about drugs is tricky, and it usually ends up being something that you have to tailor to yourself and your kid personally, rather than finding some cookie-cutter thing to say. The fear is definitely there that if you say the wrong thing or don't get your point across in the right way, that no matter what you say it will encourage your kids to go out and try it. A lot like the ideas on talking to your kids about sex. That, and its just awkward. Especially if you did do the things you're telling your kids not to do. But, its important to do it, regardless of awkwardness.