Wednesday, 09 December 2009
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Delivery Room: Who's In and Who's Out
(I wonder if my husband will be that excited when he sees our little one on the way out?
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When I deliver in the next few months I definitely would like just my husband to be by my side (along with our OB and the nurses), assisting and witnessing the birth of our first child.
However, my sister had her husband, both moms, our dad and even her best friend in the delivery room with her.
It was definitely a full house! My sister said she really liked having the support and it wasn't distracting or annoying for her.
However, I'm the kind of person that really needs to focus when nervous or stressed and dislike a lot of people to be around.
What about other moms and moms-to-be? Who did you have in the delivery room with you or who you'd like to have when you deliver?
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About the Author
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- From: babydreams@xanga
- Name: Elizabeth
- About Me: I have babies on the brain. =)
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Comments (59)
I think Im the same as you. I dont like the distractions people give me and I think having them around would just make me nervous.
I might have just my husband in the room. If he can watch me poo and not leave me then I know we'll make it. lolDefinitely do what you feel comfortable with. Some people want a bunch of family and friends around but others want to keep it more personal/private. There is no right or wrong, do what is best for you!
I was just thinking about that after going with my mom to a dr. appointment yesterday and wanting to slap duct tape across her mouth after just 5 minutes. I have family flying in from out of state, my parents (my mom & MIL especially) want to be with baby from the second he's born, but I really don't think I'm going to want anyone there but my husband. Not so much because I'll need the focus, but I'm 99% sure I'm going to be more irritable than usual, and family--as wonderful and supportive as they may be--definitely have a penchant for irritating. ;P
i will only have the doctors/nurses (possibly a midwife or something) and my husband. i just don't think it's necessary to have that many other people in the room with me, and i feel like it would be awkward having everyone staring at you down there...
I had my mom, my sister, my sister-in-law, my husband, my ob, my nurse, and at the last minute a smattering of other nurses because I had last-minute complications. But at that point, there was no one else in the world, let alone the room, but me and my sweet little angel. After the relief of that last push, there could have been 600 people in the room and I wouldn't have noticed.
I was in a unique situation - my husband was deployed when I was pregnant and so my mom and sister are who attended child birth classes with me. My husband got home just in time (days!!!) before the delivery, but there was no way I could exclude my birth coaches! On the day, when the hour came for pushing, I felt really strongly my SIL should be there too, so I invited her to stay. It was AMAZING having so many people there! We had our time to bond as just we three very soon after the delivery, but during the process I had the perfect number. This is how it went:
My husband stood by my head and wiped my brow while whispering encouragement and that he loved me. My sister and SIL had a leg each to hold back while I pushed. My mom reminded me what we talked about in childbirth class about focusing and breathing and all. It was absolutely perfect. For me, having other women there was such an incredible bonding experience and they offered me so much help that my husband did not intuitively possess. He did an awesome job, but he had no idea how to help me with some parts of it (and that may well be because he was absent during the childbirth classes, I guess we'll never know!) :0) That's what worked for me. I can't imagine doing it without women helpers for the next babies. Not to discount my husband's role, because he was incredible, but the women helped so much!
Anyway, that's what worked for me. You definitely have to find what you are comfortable with! And if things change on the day, don't be afraid to say you changed your mind! It's your birth experience!!!
I swore I didn't want anyone in there, but after my husband went to sleep at three o'clock in the morning, I was bored out of my mind. A few relatives started showing up around eight which was a nice distraction since I got a backrubs out of them! Delivery only allowed two people which was nice considering traditional birthing positions are slightly undignified.
I wish they would have stayed longer afterward. I kicked them out because I was tired but I got no rest because I had to take care of the baby and the nurses won't take the babies into the nursery until night time.
I only wanted my husband there, period (besides medical staff of course). In my mind, it was just the two of us there making the baby, so it can be just the two of us there when the baby is born!
I wouldn't have it any other way. :)
It's just going to me me, my husband, my whatever medical professionals need to be there.
I don't even want to see anybody until, at least, an hour or so, after delivery. And since my baby's will be with me the whole there's really no point in anyone even showing up at the hospital.I agree with Chrissygraves, my husband and I were the only ones there making the baby and I don't see the need in having others around.For our oldest and our youngest it was only my husband. For our middle son my mom was there with me because my husband was deployed. Everyone else was out in the waiting room.
you can have that many people in the delivery room?! I thought 3 was the max. shiiiit. My husband was the only person in the delivery room with me although, I did put my mom and my dad OR my MIL. I called my mom right when I was about to start pushing, note; my mom lives 5 minutes away from the hospital and she ended up coming RIGHT after I had my daughter cause I had to push her out within 5 minutes since her heartrate kept dropping.
I just had my husband. I enjoyed the quiet so I could focus. I wouldn't mind having my sister with me, as well, the next time.
we are planning home births when its our time.
I hate hospitals, and they are full of nasty germs and diseases. I fail to see why I should bring a brand new life into that environment. Plus, I just want to be home.
And the only ones who will be in the room with me are my midwife/dula and husband.
My mother in law can stay down in Florida until babe is 6 weeks old.
And my mom is just blocks away so they will be looking after our toddler.
With my first daughter, I was 17 and *sperm donor* wasn't involved at all. I had 4 people in the room- my mom, my dad, my grandmother, and my cousin (to videotape). I definitely needed that support at that time in my life. It was an emotional journey just getting to the point of delivery, and since I had no support from the sperm donor, I really needed my family by my side.
My SECOND daughter, I had just my husband and my mother in the room. My mom has the amazing ability to keep me super calm, and there is something amazing about having my mom be there with me for big events. We have a super close relationship and I wanted her there more than anything. My older daughter came in seconds after she was born (and wiped off a little bit) to see her.. even though there was still gore everywhere. ;)When the time comes, you will know what to do. When I had my first daughter so many people were in the room while I was in labor, and then when it came time to push I was like, "Who cares? I'm about to have a baby!!!!". lol. But with my next deliveries, I still plan on just having my husband and my mom. (Maybe one of the later deliveries, my oldest daughter, too, if she wants to be).I'm 23 weeks along, today actually, and I was talking to my hubby about this just a couple of weeks ago. I hadn't really thought about it much and mentioned to him how I really only wanted my mom in the delivery room with me...as long as she was in town in time at least (she lives in Canada, I'm in the States...). I was really surprised when he got all offended because he wanted to be in there with me. Of course, he's the daddy so I'm not gonna tell him that he can't be there when his baby girl is born, but...I really don't want him to see me like that. I can and will get over myself, lol...but I still feel weird about it.
Right now, our hospital only allows the partner to be with the mother and even after the delivery, only the siblings of the baby and grandparents may visit. No siblings of the parents or friends/other relatives due to the H1N1 outbreak.
I just had my husband in the delivery room. I let everyone come in when I was in labor (but when I checked to see how far along I was, they were out) but when pushing ONLY my husband was allowed. I am very modest, and it's just a special time between husband and wife. =)
I had my husband, my mom, his mom and my SIL. It was great. I loved that my son was welcomed to the world by a bunch of people who love him and my mom even cut his cord. (My husband was completely grossed out by it.)
I wont even call anyone until the baby is actually born! So it will just be my husband with me. No one else needs to witness it!
I like having a bunch of people, but they have to be just the right ones. One wrong person in the room throws me all off. I'm delivering at home this time because one of the nurses who attended my last birth was a wrong person.
I just had my husband in the delivery room and when I had to get an emergency c-section he was the only one. We had to keep kicking his mom out and everyone else that showed up. Next time I'm just telling my mom and we'll call everyone later when the next baby is born that way things are under control :)
I like my space!
My husband and mother in law for the first one. It was her first grand child, I had to let her. =) I'm sure my father in law would have liked to have been in there..but they shooed every one out to do a check and when he came back in there was a baby. lol.
With this one..probably just my husband. Maybe one other person, I don't know.
I want just my fiance during delivery. I dont want my mother mothering me while I'm trying to give birth.
@LauraG0929@xanga - I'm 23 weeks too. =) When's your due date?
@Fairywife@xanga - March 26th! When is yours?