Tuesday, 23 June 2009

  • I May Be Having a Miscarriage


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    So here I am about 7 almost 8 weeks into my second pregnancy. This second one is not any like my first. When I had Evan he was no trouble at all. No morning sickness, no stretch marks, nothing. But this one is giving me a whole lot of heartaches.

    It started off with a bit of morning sickness. And now... some bleeding. I went into the doctor's office yesterday and first thing she said was that bleeding is not uncommon. And she was reasurring me, telling me not to worry too much. Then we did an ultrasound "just in case".

    The next thing I know, the midwife is telling me she can't find the fetus on the ultrasound. She gave me two explanations... either our calculations are wrong and the fetus is still too early on in developing that the ultrasound can't pick it up... or its a miscarriage.

    I'm hoping for the best.. but I'm still bleeding and now I'm feeling cramps along with the bleeding. I want to be hopeful but its just so hard.

    It's funny. This second one wasn't planned at all. In fact, we were very nervous about having a second baby on top of us financially struggling at the moment. I was planning on going to work now that I've graduated and Evan's old enough to go to daycare. We were going to save up some money so that we can move out of this crappy apartment and give more space for Evan and our future babies. But once the news had settled in and we got used to the idea of a second baby we were excited. We made plans of buying Evan a "big brother" shirt, made plans of what names we should pick out, and what other baby stuff we would have to get if the baby turned out to be a girl.

    But now we hear this news and everything just seems wrong. I cannot believe this is really happening.

    What can a person do when they hear this news?

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Comments (30)

  • RoAngie467

    I think the best thing to do would be to remain hopeful. Take care of yourself. You'll be in my prayers.
  • arenfro@xanga

    I am so sorry you're dealing with such heart-wrenching issues right now, and I hope everything works out for the best.  Lean on your friends and family, and know that they love you and will help you through whatever comes next.  *hugs*
  • fadingfllowers

    I'll be praying for you and that hope you'll heal in God's hands.  I had a miscarriage when I was 6 week pregnant and I totally understand every aspect of the remorse that I went through.  Till this day sometimes my miscarriage still lingers around but be hopeful and move on to do more happier things with your son and your husband.  
  • filtered_sunlight

    Hope for the best! That's honestly about all one can do in such situations. I do hope it's just a miscalculation.
  • sunshinekl@xanga

    I am so sorry to hear you are going through this.  Hopefully you have a good support system around you that you can lean on.  I had a miscarriage with my very first pregnancy and the support of my friends and family made a huge difference.   I will be praying for you.  If you need someone to talk to who can relate, feel free to contact me.  
  • Nina1981@xanga

    I'm very sorry to hear this news.  Be strong.  I had a similar experience last year- I was pregnant with baby #5 with my now husband.  At first we were kind of freaked- cause well.. 5 kids is a lot lol, but we got used to the idea and were really excited!  At 14 weeks I miscarried.  We were devestated!  I then started thinking "Maybe we're just not meant to have a baby."  Well the next month I got my period, and all that was good.  Then I told myself Ok, I'll go one more cycle, if I just happen to get pregnant, it's meant to be, if not, then I'll go on birth control until we feel the time is right, if ever.  Well, I got pregnant!  Our baby is now 6 months.  I know it's silly to play the "if it's meant to be..." games with ourselves, but it helped me to get through it.  I take comfort in what is meant to be, will be. 
    So if this pregnancy fails, after you grieve over the devestation- you can try again OR hold off.  I just hope you can find some peace and strength through this tough time.  Take care. 

  • Kait82521@xanga

    I've had three miscarriages and the only advice I have for you is that if it is indeed a miscarriage, give yourself permission to grieve. Even though you may logically know that it's not the right time for another baby, allow yourself to be sad over it. It IS a sad thing.

    I hope you're just too early to detect the baby. I'm sending you all the good wishes in the world!
  • Lil_Firefly_25@xanga

    My mom had a miscarriage in between me and my brother. It's unpredictable and can happen to anyone especially in the earlier stages of pregnancy. But for right now, be strong, and if it is a miscarriage know that is perfectly acceptable to mourn for your baby's loss. Hopefully it is just a fumble with the calculations; hope and pray for the best!
  • MommyGEM_RN@xanga

    I'm going through the same exact thing right now but I'm only about 5 weeks along. I'm grieving with you though. *hugs* I really hope everything will be ok for you and your family.
  • muslimmom

    There's nothing you can do for a miscarriage. If it happens it happens.  Maybe this is God's way of protecting you from becoming homeless by terminating the pregnancy early.  Miscarriages are common during the first three months.  Then again there are those women who bleed during their entire pregnancy and go on to have healthy babies (like my mom who bled the entire time she was pregnant with me back in '87 when I was born 24 weeks premature and with my 7 year old brother back in '02 when she didn't find out she was pregnant with him until she was 6 months along).   

  • Hot_fo_Teacher@xanga

    My second pregnancy was a miscarriage. I went on to have two more beautiful children. They all know about Angel Baby Bella. If you have a miscarriage do not try to handle it alone. Grieve and share that grief then if you are ready try again. I believe it is God's way of protecting us.

  • sassafras007@xanga

    I just had a miscarriage about 2 weeks ago and it has been very hard. I found out at out 10 week appointment. I ended up having a d and c which was the best decision for me. I am doing better now but it has been really difficult! Keep praying for the best but know it might happen...
  • enyas_mom@xanga

    I am so sorry! We just lost a baby a few months ago.  I went for a checkup and they sent me to an ultrasound and they couldnt find the baby... after 2 weeks of more and more tests we found out it was an ectopic pregnancy.  Possibly the worst experince of my life so I know how you must be feeling.  I pray everything turns out ok and it is just a miscalculation.
  • SecretAngelWings18@xanga

    i had a miscarriage at around one month you need to stay hopeful even though it is hard and when i miscarried i knew because i was cramping horribly and bleeding just as bad i hop everything is ok! 
  • princess_deidre

    I'm so sorry you are having this scare! I will pray for you. I hope that whatever happens, you will be okay. My mother had 3 miscarraiges and I was so terrified of having one myself. So far we are doing ok. My friend has had to go to the ER more than once for bleeding but everything is ok now and she is 19 weeks. She had had some blood behind the placenta in the beginning so I don't know if it was related to that or not. Try to keep in mind that EVERY pregnancy is different and try not to stress too much b/c it won't help anything and isn't good for you or your baby. I know that sounds impossible, but try to find some peace. I will pray that you do!
  • mrsmarkwith@xanga

    i will pray for you and your baby
  • BoStOnIaNMoMmY@xanga

    Sorry to hear what ur going thru, Hopefully everything will turn out good. just be strong. Goodluck!!!!
  • lovelyingenue@xanga

    I'm very sorry for what you're going through. Take it easy, find support, and don't blame yourself.
  • SimplyNita@xanga

    I'm so sorry. I hope everything works out for you. Stay strong!
  • Lulabell_88@xanga

    I'm so sorry for you and your family! 
  • mnijeehoe@xanga

    everything happens for a reason.  the pain will fade, but your destiny is secure.


    best wishes. 

  • ManoAngeliukai9902@xanga

    I'm so sorry that you're going through this scare, this uncertainty.  My heart goes out to you.
    During my first pregnancy I began to spot.  The ob wasn't able to pick up a heartbeat, I was 10 weeks along.  Went in for an ultrasound the next day.  Was told that it could be impending miscarriage or that the date was wrong.  I knew very well when I had conceived. 
    It was a blighted ovum -- the egg was fertilized, but the fetus never formed.


    Again, I'm so very sorry about what you're going through. 

  • Gosalyn223@xanga

    I really do hope for the best. Whatever the situation, remain strong, because both are altering changes, just that one is bad and the other one is good. I hope for the good one. You willl be at my prayers, girly. You deserve to be happy.
  • the_life_of_pie@xanga

    Take care of yourself the best you can. It will be the best thing for the baby, if he or she is ok. I hope and pray for the best.
  • xPsYc0x8yTcHx@xanga

    best wishes to you.

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