Thursday, 07 May 2009
-
No, You May NOT Hold My Baby!
Why is it that complete strangers think they can just come up and grab your baby out of your arms?
At church this weekend, my husband was holding our daughter in the lobby and a lady came up exclaiming "what a cute baby!" and proceded to pull her out of my husband's arms! She didn't even ask. It freaked my daughter out, who is 8 1/2 months old and has stranger anxiety. After a few seconds of crying and my daughter pushing this lady away, she finally said "OK, you can go back to mama."
I thought it was kind of strange, but tried to be friendly and smile. After all, we were at church. Then a few minutes later, it happened AGAIN! An older lady did the exact same thing, then passed her off to a friend. I stepped in and took the baby back because she was terrified and made sure to keep a very tight grip the rest of the time there.
Is it just me, or is this rude? I think it's disrespecting the baby as well to just go up and grab her away from her parents just because "she's so cute and I just want to hold her!" I don't just go up and snatch someone's shirt or someone's purse or shoes because I like them. So why would it be OK for an infant?
Even in a place like a church, people, it's NOT OK to just grab somebody's child away from them without asking. My daughter may look friendly and smiley and outgoing, but that's because she's safe in my arms. You can admire her from a short distance or even shake her hand or foot, but please don't grab!
How do you handle baby-grabbers?
-
recommend
- recs 12
-
share
-
email
- sent 1
Related Posts
Post a Comment
- Back to momaroo's Momaroo Site!
- Note: your comment will appear in momaroo's local time zone: GMT -05:00 (Eastern Standard - US, Canada)
About the Author
-
- From: IamKelleyK@xanga
Stats: This Week All Time Posts: 0 17 Views: 0 23564 Comments: 0 683 View all posts by IamKelleyK@xanga
Comments (223)
Haha I was just looking at home videos of me as a baby and people did that to me to. My mom looked really mad and I just went stiff in their arms.
I really really hate people who do this. Almost as much as those who like to rub pregnant woman's bellys.
Could we have some personal boundaries please?? Really?
The 1st time we took our little man to church this older man came up and tired to take S out of my arms. the poor kid was traumatized and held on to me for dear life. I politely told the man that S did not like being held by strangers. The man then told me "we're all family here, he will get used to it".
I almost had a fit.
The 2nd time it happened we were having a conference at a small church and S was supposed to be sleeping. I had a baby monitor with me, and I was listening. He fussed for maybe 2 seconds and I herd someone go in the room. By the time I got there this woman I had never met had taken him out of the crib, changed him and was playing with him. She looked up at me and said "oh he didn''t want to sleep so we are playing"
I was livid. but held my tongue and left the room with him..
Then we brought a newborn fosterbabe (he was not yet a week old) in church about a month ago and some woman came up, took him out of his car seat, and started walking around with him. Rather then even saying he was my foster son, she said he was the grandson of my parents. This woman has known me for a long time too.
I don't mind when people ask if they can hold the babies, and I do say no quite a bit.If someone tries to pick them up or take them without asking, I always always step in and say no.
I'm already concerned about this and we aren't even to my due date yet. I wouldn't respond well at all. I already have two or three bottles of hand sanitizer for the people I AM willing to let touch the baby, there's now way I'd want a stranger to come up and just whisk him away. No, no thank you.
Wow - that IS rude! I can't imagine! No one has ever done that to me. Nor have I ever seen anyone do that before! If I'm aching to hold a baby in my arms, I always ask permission. The audacity of some people! Wow ............next time that happens to you and you see someone coming in for a swoop - cling real tight!! and when they grab baby, just hold on tighter! They'll get the message, won't they?
I was just thinking - with my last baby, I had him in a sling much of the time - no one thinks to grab a baby out of a sling ......do they????
The least these people could do is ask o__O
Then you could at least tell them she has stranger anxiety!
even if you knew the person it would still be rude....not like the baby is a toy or an object...he/she is a person. I'm being induced tomorrow and that would really piss me off if someone just grabbed my baby without asking.
I think that's horrible. I don't have kids yet, but I swear, when I do, I'm not going to even let someone have the chance to do that. That's even worse than random people coming up to pregnant ladies to rub their belly or talk to it out of nowhere.
Yuck! I refuse to touch a child under the age of two. I don't trust myself; I don't know what I'm carrying, like a cold or something, you know? Don't these people think about that stuff? I would refuse with an evil eye.
I always went to really tiny churches growing up, so this wasn't terribly uncommon. Everyone looked out for each others' kids, though, so there was minimal stranger anxiety. Everyone was family.
However, I can totally relate to how rude this is. My youngest brother is 17 years younger than me, and I can't tell you how many times complete strangers in the grocery store would try to take him from my arms. I had to resort to a very firm grip and switching him to my other hip so he would be out of reach. Sometimes, a very firm "no" was in order. They didn't like it... but I didn't like them snatching at my kid brother.
I totally know what you mean. It happened to me a lot at my other church.
As soon as they reached for my baby, I would tell them NO. There will be no grabbing of my baby.
My son isn't here yet (three weeks to go!!) but my friends have told me one of the best ways to handle this is to wear your baby in a sling or wrap. I plan on wearing my baby for other reasons too but....ahhhh, I'd likely punch someone! Even at church (and I LOVE where I go and everyone there, I just don't want to share my child right away!!!)
Oh my gosh! That's crazy! THankfully, that's never happened to me, but I would be soo irate if it ever happened! That is very rude, and I'd never do that to anyone else. I even feel bad asking friends to hold their babies!!
@nicolevw@xanga - Good point! I've already made it a point to wear baby #2 more often than I did with my daughter so people won't be touchy and trying to hold my baby!
People are just ignorant sometimes and do things without even thinking. These people just need to be told firmly what your wishes are regarding this. One excuse I always used was, "He hasn't been feeling well lately and I'd rather not have other people handling him right now." Or "If you'd like to hold him I would appreciate it if you would ask first. Sometimes I'd rather not have other people handling him, he can be very fussy with people he doesn't know well."
That totally freaks me out and scares me. I will NOT let people just snatch my child out of my arms. That is very rude. I don't care if I'm at church or out and about, it's just common decency to ask. I also hate people who rub the belly... Get your hands off me!
Babby snatchers!
When they come up and snatch your baby just say, "Tag, your it!" and run away.
Oy. I'm pregnant right now and this post reminded me that I've got to figure out what the heck to do. This is totally rude (same issue with the belly rub - which thankfully I have not encountered yet).
If you come up with a Top 10 List of Reasons Why You Can't Hold the Baby - you should post it.
My problem is the young girls at church. Every sunday, when church is over, these young girls (11,12ish) come up and ask to hold my baby. They're respectful enough to ask, and I feel bad saying "no"! I however, don't totally trust them carting her around! Lately Lana is getting "stranger anxiety" and I'm kinda glad! They don't wanna take her if she starts crying right away!
I cant stand when people do this. It really irritates me. When people ask, I still tell them No. Especially strangers that come up to me in some store, they have no right to touch my child ( maily because I have no idea what germs and diseases there carrying, Like SWINE FLU ). But, I dont even like it when they touch her without asking, and im not even a germ freak.
But, Its not right. My SISTERS Mother In Law, is like this. For one of my other sisters bridal showers, she asked if she could hold my daughter, and I told her yes ( because I didnt want to be rude), but she ended up taking her the whole time ( about an hour and a half ) and every time I asked for her back, she was like ' oh shes fine' and I didnt know how to approach the siuation correctly.
I dont understand why people do it either, not many people mind it, and all these people that do it, were most likley mothers at some point, and went thru the same thing, i dont get it.
That's not just rude, it's completely unacceptable.
It's not just you, it's one of the rudest things someone can do. In a day and age when kidnappings happen alot nobody should ever just grab a baby, even if it is innocent Mom and Dad don't know that.
I don't have children of my own but my sisters are 10 and 12 years younger than me. I remember my mother's reaction to anyone who tried to take them. She would say "NO" and if they tried again, she would swat their hands away and say "if you would like to hold my child, ask me first." My mother is extremely protective of us and once someone disrespects her or her children, she isn't afraid to step on toes, church or not.
Truth be told, I think I'll be taking a page out of Mom's book. Even if it means smacking some strangers.
dude i wouldn't even do that to someone's pet, let alone baby. you never know how the cat, or the rat, or the snake, or the baby would react
Wow, I've never had anyone be that rude! Also, my son usually hides his face in my shirt when it's all a bit much, so I guess that's why people don't feel the need to jank him out of my arms...
That's crazy though - and you're right, it's disrespectful toward the child. I've been teaching my son to say "hello sir/m'am" (he is two now) but I think it's ok for him to have a healthy fear of strangers... You never know, right?