I love being part of a mixed family. I do! Especially when kids are involved. You never know from day to day what will come up. For a couple of years T's ex-wife had the nasty habit of saying whatever was on her in mind in front of the children. Good or bad. Since we believe she is bi-polar and has definite anger issues, the bad outweighed the good. Their oldest child is a bright, inquisitive, talented girl. Unfortunately she has some of her mother's more emotional traits.
We have been attempting to point out to the ex that it doesn't make sense for us NOT to have the kids during long school breaks. That way the ex can have time to herself to be a woman again and not have to be mom all the time. Since we have a 7 hour drive to visit with the kids, monthly visits have to suffice. Now after all this time, the ex agrees. She would love for us to take the kids (their son is their youngest) for a while during spring break. Unfortunately the daughter is revolting. She is absolutely NOT going to do it! Period!
Our reaction was "okay, maybe next time" and we'll take the son and have fun! The ex is fuming. She wants to make the daughter come so she can have her free time. We say no, don't do that. Then the girl will always associate spending time with us as a punishment. My thoughts are that now the woman is reaping what she sowed. If she hadn't been so negative to begin with and let the children develop feelings on their own, we wouldn't have this issue.
What is your opinion? Should divorced or separated parents talk about the other parent in front of the children? Should they make a child visit when they don't want to?