Sunday, 08 March 2009
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Oh, Terrible Twos
Millie is approaching/has arrived early to the terrible twos and it shows. Livie didn't have terrible twos, she had frightful fours, so this is a bit of new territory for me.
Last night, Millie brought back to mind a piece of a nursery rhyme: "When she's good she's very, very good, but when she's bad she's horrid." For only the second time in her life, she had a complete and total meltdown in which she turns into an angry, screaming, kicking, fighting banshee, and nothing in the world will get her to stop.
The first time was last week when she was sick, so I blew it off as a combo of illness and exhaustion. Last night, she wasn't sick, but I guess she was over-tired. (I should also note that this is the week Jonny is out of town, so he was spared.)
I tried distraction, I tried comfort, I tried discipline, and finally decided bed was the answer, so I somehow managed to bathe her and get her in her PJs (which resembled several different rodeo events in one, only imagine them being performed by a pregnant cowboy who's too large to bend in the middle), and deposited her in her bed at 7:00 without her usual bedtime routine.
She continued to scream for 30 more minutes, at which point she fell asleep and slept all night. It was so bad that while she was in the bath tub, Livie came in and said with concern, "What are you doing to her?" I guess she thought I was torturing her and it made me glad we didn't live in an apartment because I'm pretty sure the cops would have been called. I sure would have called them on my neighbors if I had heard what Millie was doing emanating from their apartment.
Livie would have meltdowns at this age, but they would manifest as uncontrollable crying (like sadness), rather than full-on screaming rages. Ahhh, the joys of motherhood.
Interestingly, though, as Millie has gotten older and is starting to have more emotional moments, it is changing the way Livie is acting. Livie is naturally highly emotional which can sometimes turn into whining and moodiness, but several times in the last week, Millie's emotions have stopped Livie in her emotional tracks.
Last night, Livie was whining about dinner, but when Millie started ramping up her screaming fit, suddenly Livie stopped complaining, decided she liked the dinner and proceeded to eat the whole thing (after asking for ketchup to dip everything in, which is always fine with me). She also acted much more grown up and was pleasant the rest of the evening, while normally her whining about dinner precedes an entire difficult evening. (She kept saying, in reference to me dressing Millie for bed, "That was like wrestlin' a hog!" That's my Texas girl.)
So, I guess the moral of the story is that God clearly sees that I can handle only one emotionally charged child at a time and is merciful in allowing Livie to grow up some by seeing her sister act out. Or, the alternative moral is, there's always a silver lining if you look hard enough.
And I'm also glad that as an experienced mother, I know this is a stage that will pass, if we can survive it.
How did you handle your children's terrible twos?
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- From: utlawgirl@xanga
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Comments (9)
My daughter entered this stage early as well. She's now 26 months and I'm happy (and a bit cautious as well) to say that it's over. She's always demanded attention so I can tell when she needs attention and when she's completely melting down and now that she can communicate with me better, she's like a completely different child. So, there is hope. Hang in there.. Maybe buy some ear plugs....
My daughter who is 25 months tomorrow, didn't really go through this. The terrible twos is actually the 2nd year of life, which is between 1-2, so if she is turning two soon, it should end soon...hopefully. That's why for a lot of people, it seems like the terrible twos come early. I know this is around when they start saying no a lot....for no particular reason sometimes.
http://pediatrics.about.com/od/toddlers/a/05_terrble_twos.htm
http://www.babycenter.com/0_your-20-month-olds-social-and-emotional-development-terrible_1273321.bc
Good luck with everything! Parenting is definitely a challenging job. Worth it in the end though, right?
My mom always said that terrible two's is a misnomer - that from 3 to 4 is worse by far! I have to agree, so far. My son is 3 and a half and is definitely much more difficult than he was when he was 2! It's the independence thing. And the fact that he's extremely stubborn.
My daughter is about to turn 2. So far, she's quite stubborn herself, but is very communicative so we are able to reason with her pretty well.....we'll see how things progress with her!
I think the 3's are way worse than the 2's with my oldest so far. He's nearing 4 and has been so much sweeter. But as a 3 year old, he did have those horrible meltdowns that you mentioned, screaming uncontrollably, and I would say it was like, "wrestling a hog" to get him to do just about anything.
I've worked in childcare for the past 4 years and I've come to the conclusion that 3's are worse than 2's. Of course, every child is different, but that's what I've experienced so far.
2, 3, and 4. Those are the worst. My little sister entered the terrible two late. And it is horrible. She's whiney, tempermental and throws a fit of often she managed to rack up 35 minutes ot time out. (5 min times outs every time she throws a tantrum) When my mom's not home, I feel like ripping my hair out since I don't know what to do. I don't take the pill, but this will keep me from having children till I'm well and ready, lol.
When my brother was little (I don't remember how old, but I'm sure he was younger than 2), he would throw unbelievably loud fits. All my mom did was put him into one of those folding baby beds, and shut him in the living room. He would proceed to scream for an hour, if not more. It was horrible, but I don't even know if it helped in the long run.
My daughter is 18 months old now and i dont know she enjoys teaasing me.I give her food but she dont take it and instead tease me may be its due to the reason that i give her less time but i am working as a guide at girona airport and i have to travel a lot and its difficult to take her along.