Wednesday, 25 February 2009
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Do You NIP? - Breastfeeding in Public
by Mama Fox 
Before I jump into this topic I want to say something. It is extremely irritating that breastfeeding is flagged as misspelt by my browser.
Anyway, I am a NIPer. I Nurse In Public. I thank my brother-in-law for helping me learn to nurse discreetly in my own home, as he stayed with us for a couple of weeks when my son was a few weeks old. I'm sure he saw more than he probably wishes to see of his brother's wife, but he was a gentleman about it and generally ignored that for a good portion of the day, I did have a baby on my boob.
After that, being in public was no big deal. My first ever in public nursing session came at the WIC office. I was there to return the breastpump they gave me and, of course, my barely a month old baby was hungry. I had him in my ring sling and after a bit of maneuvering, he latched on and everyone was happy. I was thrilled that it worked so easy.
That was the start of many public feedings of his life, at restaurants, at department stores, at the park. With the help of my sling, I even fed him while walking around Walmart. I am on the larger size of breast sizes so I did have a few issues that other "less lucky" women wouldn't, but overall, I kept things discrete without the help of a blanket.
I had never once felt uncomfortable nor did I ever have someone tell me that I needed to stop, leave, or feed my baby in the bathroom. I am extremely grateful to have a supportive husband, with a thorough knowledge of the laws. Although he's not extremely comfortable with it, I know that if we are approached, my husband would be there to back my and our child's rights up 100%.
One thing I do want to state is that breastfeeding in public is legal in the United States. You can whip your boob out and feed your bundle of joy in any place you are allowed to be. It is your right to provide nourishment to your baby and your baby's right to receive it when and where they want it.
Now it does get a bit sticky when you are told to leave a place, specifically a restaurant. They can refuse service to anyone and if you are told to leave, you can be charged with trespassing. You can inform the manager for your legal rights and hope they say "okay my bad," but if not, it's your best bet to leave, stating that they lost your business and you will be spreading the news about their callous ways of treating mothers. News stations are particularly fond of stories like these.
By breastfeeding in public we are increasing awareness that this is a normal and healthy way of feeding our baby. In previous years, it has seemed that feeding your baby in the way humans were designed to feed our babies, should be done locked away in the back room where no one can see. Mothers have been excluded from family meals, going to sit on the toilet in restaurants, sitting in the car at parks all for the sake of making other people comfortable while she feeds her baby.
It's nothing to be ashamed of. Of course you don't want to be all in your face about it, but at the same time, you should be able to nurse when and where you need to. Nursing tops make it even easier to nurse discretely without going through the hassle of blankets or covers. I always found that having the blanket always draws more attention then just breastfeeding quietly.
Here are a few quick come backs if you have just encountered an anti-NIPer... all should be delivered with a sweet smile.
Why don't you feed him in the bathroom?
Would you like to take your meal and eat in there?
Do you have a blanket to cover up?
I don't eat with a blanket over my head, why should she?
Isn't he a little old to still be nursing? (regardless if your baby is 6 months old or 2 years or older)
Obviously not.
If you don't feel comfortable breastfeeding in public, that is okay too. You do whatever you need to do, but always remember that if you choose to do so, that it is legal and just may inspire others to feed their babies in public as well.
Are you a NIPer? Have you ever been approached and told to cover up or leave?
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About the Author
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- From: mamafox
- Name: Mama Fox
- About Me: Hi y'all, I'm Mama Fox! I'm a young, optimistic homeschooling mama of three boys. This is all about our adventures and at times misadventures of raising little men in today's world and pretty much whatever else is on my mind. :)
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Comments (39)
I NIP. I don't like to, though, because being away from my chair at home is never as comfortable. I agree that the blanket makes it more obvious. I've never had anyone ask me to leave, but I have had people ask me to cover up. They generally ask before i latch the baby on, and are then surprised that I don't need to cover up... they can't see anything.
I really don't see why so many people are so squimish or are prudes about breast feeding. It is a breast. You see more nudity on soap operas, network prime time, and the beach. If you have ever walked the halls of a middle school or high school, you see plenty of flesh there as well. All of that is sexual flesh and nobody bats an eyelash (even on a 12 year old dressed like a Bratz doll)...but whip a source of food out and watch people turn pale.
I didn't breast feed my first child, but I fully intend to give it a go with the one due in May. I would rather not have to deal with fedding in public simply because I am not sure Junior can be so patient in having his shopping or activity disrupted by my need to stop what I am doing. However, if I need to...I need to. If anyone has a problem with it then they will find out what they can kiss.
I am too old and too independent to give a rat's behind what other's think or what makes THEM comfortable. I don't see them going out of their way to make my day any easier, better, more comfy, etc.
@mamaelephant - i agree completely!
@mamaelephant - I so agree!!
And to the OP, thank you, thank you, thank you for posting this!
Women please please please feed your babies anywhere and anytime they are hungry. I would much rather see a breast than hear a hungry baby cry............ ~Echo
We are attached at the NIP....I nurse where ever my baby needs to without being a flasher....love Ring slings for this and button down shirts.....
I have only NIP'ed at the WIC office and at the doctor's office. But then I got a breastpump so it wasn't an issue.
i definately NIP. i usually do use a blanket, though, because i don't trust myself and my innate clumsiness NOT to flash my breast at the world, haha. but then i think- would it really be that big of a deal if someone happened to catch a glimpse of my breast while i was feeding my daughter? as mentioned above, you see more skin walking down a high school hallway than you do on a breastfeeding mother.
i figure my child and her well-being are FAR more important than some prude being offended by such a natural and healthy sight. and besides, i would feel terrible to be sitting in a restaurant enjoying my dinner while my daughter was waiting to be fed.
i don't know why this is such a big deal....
:)
I will, but only with a ring sling or nursing cover. I'm a little too self conscious about anyone seeing my boob on accident is all.
I don't think its wrong for people to NIP. I would probably just be uncomfortable to breast feed without a blanket cause im kinda modest. idk. it might be different when i get an actual baby of my own and get older lol.
I think that if a mother wants to cover because she feels more comfortable, then that's great. It's another issue entirely when a mother is made to feel that she *has* to use a blanket, hide in another room, or pump a bottle ahead of time.
The reason breasts exist is to nurse children. Sure, most men love boobs, and they can be viewed as a sexual object but first and foremost, they were created to give babies the nutrients they need to survive.
People who get upset about breastfeeding in public are setting breasts primarily as a sexual body part instead of a means of getting food, which is the REAL primary purposes of breasts.
I think it only gets awkward when the kid is too old to need to breastfeed; if they can eat solid foods, or can ask to nurse, etc. it's probably best to either wean or do it in private.
Nice post. :) I'm not a mom and won't be one for a looong time, but when I am I do plan on breastfeeding and it will happen wherever it needs to happen.
my baby will be here in three months and I will definitely be breastfeeding in public.
I will be modest about it as much as I can but oh my word...when my baby is hungry my baby will eat, no matter where we are. I think the only place I will probably excuse myself to another room is at church. Unless my baby is a quiet nurser and I can do that discreetly I will just go to the nursery to not disrupt services.
That's what breasts are there for, right?
I used to NIP all the time when John was younger. I try not to do it anymore now that he is older. It is mostly because he has the tendency to open things and whip things out that I would prefer that other people not see. Usually if he wants to nurse in public now, it means he is tired and I should take him home. If he is hungry, giving him a snack usually kills the urge.
The only person that ever asked me to cover was my mom. I of course never did.
I NIP. If I formula fed I wouldn't hesitate to bottle feed my hungry kiddo so I don't hesitate to feed my breastfed kiddo. Boobs are baby food, end of story.
I'm definately a NIP'er. I've never been able to use a blanket because my my baby has always refused to latch with anything over her head. I live in an area where NIP is generally accepted and have had very little trouble. Here's a great story that happened to my friend.
Mommy NIP on a bench in Walmart by the checkout.
Random Lady: Don't you have a blanket? I don't want to see that.
Mommy digs in her diaperbag and pulls out a blanket.
Random Lady looks smug
Mommy offers blanket to random lady
Random lady looks confused
Mommy: So you can cover your head until she's done eating
Random Lady storms off
Mommy resumes nursing unmolested
Bystanders giggle.
I don't care what people do, but I do care if they are being discreet about it and respectful of others. I once saw a woman pull her breast out in the middle of a busy mall, THEN get her baby out of the stroller and get him ready to feed. The whole time one breast is just hang out for everyone to see. So in a way I do have a double standard about it, if a woman can be discreet and respectful, keep herself completely covered up and not expose anything, plus keep in mind that although natural and normal, children and some men (the perverted ones) don't need to be around it, (I say children because some were not taught very well that certain things are private and comments and undue attention don't need to be drawn to what is happening and in some cases kids ask FAR TOO MANY and inappropriate questions) then sure, fine do as you please.
But on the other hand if you can't be respectful and discreet then I honestly think you have two choices use a bottle (breast pumped milk or formula, whichever you need to do), feed your baby at home or in a private location such as a restroom, and work out shopping and errands around that. Because while you have the right to do it, you shouldn't make others uncomfortable when you do.
Thank you for this post! I have NIP before. The first time was at my daughter's 1 week check up at the doctor's office, so I was still fumbling and awkward with nursing anyway. But, it was fine. Another time, we were in WalMart when she got hungry. My options were: Nurse in Subway inside the Walmart where a group of teenage boys sat, in my car in December, or in a bathroom at the far end of the store where there was a bench. Because I still hadn't mastered nursing and walking at the same time, I chose the bathroom. I have found that my baby doesn't really like to be covered (who would want to eat with their head covered!) I use a blanket to get her latched then I remove it from her head. And besides, I like to be able to look at her. There is incredible bonding with breastfeeding through that eye contact.
Mine are all older now, but I did and I did use a blanket because I didn't want to accidentally flash anyone. I don't see a problem as long as you aren't flashing your breast to the world. Being discreet is good.
yep I certainly do I have a "hooter hider" though lol that has a strap around the neck. I have nursed in a bunch of places, even in the grocery store when she was 3 days old and I NEEDED to get groceries. I just walked around with her in one arm nursing. I've been glared at before but I glare right back. If I ever heard someone get angry at a woman for NIP I would defend her, no matter who she is. If you don't want to see, don't look....simple...
When my little brother was born in 99 they had just made it legal to NIP in GA.
My mother took FULL advantage of it. I plan on NIP'ing all of my children. What is the point of pumping bottles when your breast it right there... the milk is ready and at the perfect temp.
If people have a problem with it that's on them... unless the woman is just rude with her boobs. I hate that!!! I don't mind seeing boobs it's nothing wrong with them but people DO stare and make ugly comments.
I really want to be better at feeding in public. This last year (1st birthday today for my son!) I've almost always covered up when in public places with a nursing cover. I feel more comfortable that way. But eventually I really hope to be able to bf in public WITHOUT a cover. One of the ladies at church as 6 babies and I noticed one day at a church picnic that she was feeding her youngest (about a month younger than mine) but also realized I would NOT have noticed if I hadn't ever been there before myself. In other words - most people probably didn't know she was breastfeeding. That's how I want to be. But how do you learn? I think it would help to be able to practice around the house with friends over. I didn't use a cover when at one friend's house if i needed to feed there and more practice probably would have made me more confident.
Now I only breastfeed twice a day - in the morning and at night so I don't have a need to breastfeed my son in public right now. But I hope to have more chances for practice soon (with a new baby)!
I am a NIPer and have been with all 3 of my kids. My 2nd wasn't able to eat food till she was 15 months old so thank heavens for nursing or it would have cost gobs to keep her in formula! With my 1st I had to learn how to nurse without a blanket so I didn't even bother with the other two. I have only flashed 1 person and it was a kind older woman who let me know my baby was looking around and not eating...lol...but as far as other children seeing a woman nurse whats wrong with that? It should bring up questions if they haven't seen a baby nurse before, theres nothing wrong with a child asking questions.
I NIP'd at will again. Babies gotta eat just like the rest of us. I have no idea why people have an issue with this in this country. I did use a nursing cover for my own comfort and because at times my son pulled my shirt halfway off... but I never nursed in a bathroom- yuck!