My friend, David, once told his mother, "I wish I were stupid, that way I could be happy and you wouldn't set unrealistic expectations for me."
David's mother wants the best for her son, which in this case means he has to be a doctor. In my family, my mom literally said, "I'm not ashamed of you anymore
," when I told her about the unpaid internship I'd be doing to boost my writing portfolio.
I know parents want the best for their kids, but the "best" in my family is usually defined as "I want you to have a really secure, conventional job and marry as soon as you can."
That can be a bit stifling.
I do not have a full-time job, and am nowhere close to married. Does that mean I'm failing them until I find these things? I know that's not the case, but I don't know how to relate to them sometimes.
What would you like your kids to accomplish? What happens when you start disagreeing with the choices they make?