Monday, 29 December 2008
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Santa Doesn't Care About You, Human Beings Do...
Guest post submitted by Alex_Horschack
I certainly believe in the spirit of giving. In fact, I'm characteristically preoccupied by it. I want more than anything to encourage empathetic humanism by setting an example and providing to those in need.
You'd think that I get all giddy every year once holiday toy drives roll around and donation stations are set up outside of every major grocery and retail outlet so that the underprivileged children of the world can wake up to presents under their trees left by Santa just like everybody else. But I don't.
I think that if you don't or you can't or you won't care about or think about or provide to the unfortunate and the destitute at any time of the year (and not just when corporate consumerism tells you to) then you shouldn't be in charge of telling the recipients of human kindness where their donations came from!
I don't at all like the idea of propagating a culture of expectation from the mysterious beyond. I think it's destructive to teach children that gifts will appear because a magical figure living in frigid isolation is capable of providing for all the world's children regardless of the fact that their parents are in the worst financial crunches of their lifetimes.
By recycling these myths for the sake of cuteness and tradition and offering a 'normal' childhood to their offspring, parents all over the country are eating their own words now that they can't back their sh*t up.
It's a terrible idea to let misguided but well-meaning donors continue to mislead these children into thinking there's always going to be a holiday safety net when there won't always be. It teaches dependence.
Whenever there is a holiday safety net providing for you though, I can tell you who's not responsible for it...Human beings care about human beings, Santa Claus does not.
I understand that children will grow up and eventually understand that Santa and the Easter Bunny and the Great Pumpkin are just fairy tales, but they'll have fond emotional memories of these cancerous fairy tales, and they'll pass them on to all of the children in their lives.
Teach children where their livelihood comes from... from other human beings who are concerned about them and care about them enough to reach out to them with provisions (be they parents or church organizers or complete strangers). Let's stop treating children like it will take them a lifetime to understand the ways of the world. If we treat them like they're capable of understanding, then they'll understand much more rapidly and much more fully. And they'll feel grateful for it. They'll feel respected and provided for and loved. I think that's a hell of a lot better way for our children to feel versus expectant and entitled.
I don't have a problem with holiday decorations and music and food and parties and togetherness and the things that originally made the winter holidays of any given culture so great. I'm not against the holiday spirit at all! But let's please take the fairy tales out of it and build stronger communities by giving credit where it's due: to each other.
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About the Author
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- From: Alex_Horschack@xanga
- Name: Alexander
- About Me: Psychology student, activist, musician, innovator, entrepreneur, adventurer, amateur chef, exercise and nutrition enthusiast, Japanese language student... It could keep going forever!
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Comments (9)
I agree with everything you said.
Oh and don't forget about the fact that Santa only brings presents to good little boys and girls.
I agree with you, very well written.
I totally agree with you. Our parents spoiled us every Christmas, I have fond memories of that, and quite a few (though nowhere near the majority) of the presents were from Santa. My husband and I decided this year, for our four-year-old now that he's old enough to REALLY understand Christmas, we're still going to do Santa, but Santa is going to bring one present, and not something major. We like the tradition and memories our families had for us surrounding Santa so we want to keep that. However, we also want our children to understand that their presents come from us and all our hard work and caring.
I have avoided responding to this subject the entire season this year but since this forum has been presented yet again, here is my take on this. No, I don't agree with the originator of this post or any that have responded to it. I am a grandmother now, I was a mother to my two sons and I worked hard at being Santa when they were small. Santa brought things that Mom could not afford, things from all over the world, unusual, never before seen things that led to conversations about other countries and cultures. I also took them with me to visit children that had very little and part of our Christmas money always went to buy presents and food for these families. We were very active in our church and my sons grew up totally knowing that Christmas was more about the birth of Jesus than about presents from any source.
My boys believed until they were at least age 9, and when they were
ready we had the conversation about where the gifts really came from.
It did not result in emotional trauma but rather a slow realization of
just how much time and care I took to provide the experience for them.
Once they were old enough to figure out Santa they accepted that the magic had been supplied by Mom but they also recognized the anonymous aspect of giving with no expectation of recognition for the gift. This has stayed with them and they are both extremely generous, kind, and compassionate men in their own right. I know people that had a hard time learning the "truth" about Santa but it is my personal opinion that their parents did not handle the whole situation correctly. Santa is about imagination, tradition, giving unselfishly, and surprises. I taught my boys about the real St. Nicholas and his tradition of giving selflessly without expectation of acknowledgment, and this has carried over into caring about others and providing for those in need all year round.
Everyone has to do what they feel is right but I know Santa was a wonderful part of our family traditions and there has never been a problem with distinguishing between believing in Santa and true belief in Christ as our Savior, no problem transitioning between receiving from an unselfish giver into being a unselfish giver and the "magic" still lives in all our hearts making Christmas Eve a bit more special even at the ripe old age of 57.
Such insidious tales! Poison! Lies!
Toy drives! Capitalism! OH, THE HUMANITY!!!
My children are just past the age of beleiving in the santa that we allowed and helped them to beleive in. I am not sorry that we did that because in our case it was harmless. I truly believe in a moderation of all things- reality, magic, tradtition, values. We never heaped lavish and exorbitant gifts onto the kids in the name of Christmas. We continue to teach them that giving is what it's all about. 365 days of the year most americans are inundated with commercialism and materialism and THATs what harms the psyches of children- not tradition.
I agree kids should not be judged on good or bad. What about the kids that don't get gift's for whatever reason are they to believe they were naughty all year. I think this also carries over into adulthood that if you don't get a present from someone then nobody loves you and then everybody question's why the suicide rate jumps over the holidays.
Are you saying Santa is make-believe? Noooo.....
I'm 24, and I do realise that Santa is not real. But I don't see what's wrong with keeping the magic alive during Christmas, or even all year round. I get excited with my friends' kids about Santa, we discuss about how Santa is going to arrive, how the reindeer survive the Australian summer, and if Santa will come if we can't sleep on Christmas Eve. I get asked if I've seen Santa, and I say no, and tell them it's because Santa has to keep his mystery, otherwise it's hard for him to do his job. It's about joy, giving, imagination and magic. All positive things for children. And no, I don't tell them that they will not get pressies if they've been naughty. I simply wrote a card encouraging them to be even better next year.
When they grow older and realise that Santa is actually their parents (and me), they will learn the value of giving without expectation. Of generous giving without even signing your real name on the gift/card. That giving is about making the receiver happy, not getting credit and not about being known.
This year, I left my housemates gifts on Christmas morning, and signed off as Santa. They knew it was me (since I'm the only nutcase who goes on and on about Christmas), but it still gave some Christmas magic. I also did it so that they would know that they don't have to give me anything back in return.
When I was a kid, I was convinced fairies were real. It spurred my imagination, and kept my childhood exciting. What's wrong with a little magic in life?
There is nothing wrong with children believing in Santa AND the goodness of humanity. Sheesh, I see so much of this in today's young parents. You'd think that with all the hurt, sadness, and violence in the world, that carrying on the tradition of St. Nicholas or Father Christmas or whatever you call him, would be a welcome diversion for a child.
You can either paint a picture of an elusive, scary old man who brings lavish gifts or you can choose to play up his good attributes.
You can even still teach your kids about Jesus' birthday and include Santa in your traditions.