Tuesday, 18 November 2008
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QOTD: Too Old to Have a Baby?
by Momaroo Team 
How old do you think is too old for a woman to have a baby?
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Comments (59)
I feel that if a woman chooses to have a baby later, that's a valid life decision. Still, I think that having a baby 50 and over (whether through a surrogate, adoption, or biologically) is a bit too much since you have to consider the child in 20-30 years.
When she is no longer physically able!
...after menopause!
Women are having babies older and older all the time. I think as long as you feel you have the energy to keep up with and give a child all they need, then whenever you are ready. I am a very young mother (18 when I had my first, 24 when I had my 4th) and I am glad in certain aspects.I am young enough to keep up with them(for the most part), and when they do get older and *sob* leave me, I will still be young enough to do all the things I want to later on.
The younger the better, for their health and the babies. The chances of difficulties including Downs Syndrome ( the risk rises from 2 per 1,000 births at ages 35-39 years, to 4 per 1,000 at age 40-44 years up to 14 per 1,000 at age 45 years or over) and other genetic problems.If you want to have a baby at an older age, definitely consider getting genetic testing. However, the biggest problem for the 35+ers will probably be getting pregnant in the first place.
I think it is a personal choice - so my personal choice is to have children while I am still *considered* young. By the time baby #2 gets here I will be 24 and we want to have one more in the next couple of years. I like the idea that I am able to keep up with the kiddos now and will be still be young enough to enjoy my life after the kids go away to college - plus, I will *hopefully* still be around to enjoy grandkids.
@XfantomcatX@xanga - While it is certainly true that the risk of having a child born with Down syndrome is higher for older women, statistically more children with Down syndrome are born to younger mothers. The reason that is has been explained because more younger women give birth.
My feeling is that it is up to each woman. While I do agree that 50 seems a bit old to me, if the woman is up to the task, more power to her.
I perhaps have a very biased opinion. My last two children were born after I was 35.
@tedder6@xanga - My first was at 19 and my 4th at 28. I thought I was done and it was all according to my plan to have all my babies young so like you I would still have time to enjoy doing things and going places, etc. after they were grown and on their own. But....sometimes God has other plans and I had my 5th at the age of 40.
@XfantomcatX@xanga - I had my 5th at the age of 40 and had not trouble getting pregnant, as a matter of fact, it was unplanned!
Health risk aside, I think it would unfair to the child to have elderly parents. Isn't there a mother in her 70s with a 2 or 3 year old girl? It is a shame that the mother will most likely die while her daughter in still very young (even if the daughter is 20 that is very young to me). The mother probably doesn't have the energy to get down and play with her child, let alone all the physical things that come with being a mother. While there is a lot more to being a mother then that, that is a part of it that it seems she would not be able to provide. That's my 2 cents.
35 to 40 should be the upper limit. Think about it, your child will have parents the same age as some of their friends' grandparents. I know this really bothered one of my youngest cousins when she was growing up.
Another friend had her first and only as she was approaching 40. The demands of motherhood were tougher for her to keep up with than they were for friends and relatives who made that adjustment at a younger age.
@sugartomyhoney@xanga - WOW! I got pregnant with my last two kids on b.c. It just shows you, when God knows you need another, no man made contraceptive can hold back His plans. I bet you would rather be raising your child then anyhing else right?
@tedder6@xanga - I wouldn't trade this time with my little one for anything! He is amazing and has changed the life of all of us!
@sugartomyhoney@xanga - I am really dreading when my kids leave me. It breaks my heart to even think about it. I just love having all these kids around me. It will be so lonly when they grow up. My husband would have a heart attack if he read this, but I would just keep having them if it was up to me.
I "thought" I was too old to have a baby. I had my children young. I was 19 when my first was born. She is 20 now and has a son. My"baby" is 16... for now. In May I will give birth to my fourth child. Six years ago I was told due to poly cyctic ovarian syndrome my chances of ever having a nothing child were right about zero. *(at the time hubby and I wanted one together --this is my second marriage). I jokingly had said well that's that.. at least I won't be 40 and pregnant! HA! I will turn 40 on month before this baby is born.
After the initial shock and worry about can I give this child all he or she will need...we are happy. This is truly a blessing. The reactions of our kids was great!
any age after 43
If women are able to conceive until they hit menopause, there is no reason compelling enough for me to tell anyone they cannot have children until after they hit menopause.
Even then, I know many older couples who have adopted (mostly older children and teenagers) after their own children are grown and have made wonderful parents to these children in need.
I think it is a personal choice.
I would think older 20's to mid 30's id the ideal time..... but really its all up to the woman. Anyone can be a good mother/father at any age.
As long as you are physically capable of getting pregnant, I don't think anyone is too old to be a mother. That being said, having kids before 35 is ideal.
I personally want all mine out before 25 so i can be young and take care of them then they'll be grown by the time i'm 40. That's still young enough to go do the things i wanna do.
After 45 seems a bit too old for a new baby.
Agh, my mother is 44 and I cannot imagine her having another baby.
Funny that is this is the question of the day....today is my birthday and I was just thinking about writing a post about this as I ponder that I am getting older. I think there is a delicate balance finding the ideal age biolgy has for childbearing and the other things life has to offer outside of motherhood that are often also best achieved during the childbearing years. It is tricky if you have a lot of goals. Just because you are physically able to have a baby does not mean you are emotionally and financially prepared. Likewise, age starts to work against you in your mid to late 30's. If you are lucky, (or plan well) the stars align and you get to do it all. It is all about finding that sweet spot.
@tedder6@xanga - I think God gave me my last one because he knew I couldn't handle all of the others growing up and moving out. Worse still is the fact that they don't all live in the area! It is sad at times and I miss them terribly, but my 6 year old does keep me busy :)
I think 40 is a good age to stop having Children. You want to be around to see your children's children as well and have a child at 45 is just too old.
@juejee@xanga - Your situation is so close to mine it is funny! I was married and had 4 children by the time I was 28. Then my husband walked out and a bit later I ended up remarried. I had NO thoughts of having another child even though my husband had no children of his own. He secretly at the time really did want a child. Well, I did end up pregnant! Definitely NOT planned and I had a little boy when I was 40! My youngest at the time was 12. And just like you he has been a true blessing. With all the older sibs he is one very loved little boy!
Blessings to you and your family!