Wednesday, 05 November 2008
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What Not To Say To A Pregnant Woman
Guest post submitted by thesecretlifeofkat
Here is an excerpt from a conversation I had with my sweet husband today as I was leaving the house to meet a friend for coffee:
Me: “Well, I should be back before dinner. I love you.”
(hug)
Him: (Steps back and looks at me.) “I think you’re bigger this pregnancy than you were the other two. Wouldn't you say?”
Me: blank stare
Him: “I mean at this point in your pregnancy I think you’re stomach is bigger. “
Me: blank stare
Him: “Um...I mean it’s bigger in a pregnant way....not in a fat way.”
Me: blank stare
Him: “But...but...you don’t look pregnant at ALL from behind.”
Me: blank stare
Him: “I mean you’re a really fit pregnant woman....you look great....”
Me: blank stare
Him: “I suppose that’s one of those things you shouldn't say to your pregnant wife....?”
Me: “I suppose so.”
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Comments (153)
The problem is not pregnant women. The problem is woman that look pregnant but are not.
My husband said one time "From the back you still have your shape, you can't even tell your pregnant" And i'm like "awww thanks" then.."But from the front you're HUGE"..haha.
Oh well, that's men for ya! And i was even actually considered a "small" pregnant woman. If that even exists.
@Curse_of_Greyface@xanga - You're too right about that!
My father got kicked out of a lamaze class for saying to my mother, "Look at all the beached whales!"
Needless to say, the ladies in charge were not amused.
He then got kicked out of the labor room while my mother was having my brother for saying, "So, wanna do this again?"
My father is my hero.
@Wait_by_Moonlight@xanga - Hahaha! Your Father is my hero too.
I think it's stupid to let a comment like that be annoying or offensive. Seriously, women need to get over themselves about being "fat" while pregnant. Uh..HELLO! You have a freakin' human being in your stomach! Of course you are going to look fat! It's supposed to look that way! Sheesh!
"Didn't you have that baby yet?" When it is quite obvious that she did NOT have the baby yet. Don't ask stupid questions.
I'm fat. I'm aware of this. But the most painful and insensitive comments I received when pregnant with my son were, "You don't even LOOK pregnant!" "You're 35 weeks? Oh, you're not even showing!" And of course these comments were always meant to sound like compliments.
The thing I got tired of hearing was, "Awww, you're waddling!"
"You're HUGE!" or anything even slightly similar!
That is frigging hilarious!!
The REAL problem is looking pregnant from behind.
I had someone tell me I was looking "plump". i wasn't sure how to take that... :)
I also HATE the question "so, haven't had that baby yet".
ugh, that's wonderful. something to look forward to when i'm pregnant. hehe.
I don't think there's a problem with saying that, it wasn't meant to be insulting. I think some pregnant women are just too sensitive and need to learn to laugh at themselves a little.
A guy should never tell his pregnant wife "I ate the last double stuff oreo!"
I think it would be a compliment to say you don't look pregnant from behind!!!
@TashaDW_18@xanga - That was the most annoying one.
"You're really big! Are you having twins?"
hearing
I think the most offensive things said to me while I was pregnant were:
1) "So, Larry really likes to keep them barefoot and pregnant, doesn't he?" (This was from my uncle, who was a bit of a pig. During my third pregnancy, which only followed my second by a few months. I was so shocked all I could think of to say was, "But...I have shoes!")
2) "You haven't dropped that thing yet?" (From my neighbor, who is a nice guy but didn't put that particular question together with the utmost sensitivity.)
Much like others, I heard the "you haven't had that baby yet"?
I usually didn't mind, but with my daughter I actually went in to be induced and still didn't have her until a week later. That was a tough one.
That seriously made me laugh out loud.
I once asked my husband for help getting up off the couch. He turned to me and said I can't believe I'm about to help you when you're only 4 months pregnant.
I was eight months pregnant.
hehe
"So, when are you going to pop?"
"Are you sure it's not twins?"
"You don't mind me touching your belly, do you?" (while rubbing your belly)
"You're still here?" (I refuse to go to church anymore after I'm about 36 weeks pregnant.)
"Did you swalow a basketball?"
I don't mind any reference to the belly region...what I mind is when people are stupid enough to say things like, "you're starting to put on a little in your hips...but don't worry you'll lose it". GRRR!
My sister had her baby last week and was up the next day walking the halls when a nurse saw her and said, "you tryin' to walk yourself into labor!?"