Wednesday, 01 October 2008
by Mama FoxThis is for the SAHM's.
I have been a stay at home mom for 4 1/2 years. Sure it's rough at times. There's times I wish I could drop the kids off at a day care and just play hooky from life. But this is what I want, what I choose to do. I enjoy spending time with my boys. I don't know if I could handle being away from them for so many hours every day 5 days a week.
Early in my pregnancy with my oldest, I told Papa Fox how important staying at home was to me. I wanted at least a year but hoped for longer. He agreed, he wanted me home with our son too. We talked about when our kid(s) were in school full time I would work. Of course I would have rather stay home but having the extra money would be great.
It was rough on Papa Fox but also in the end, any job I could have gotten would have just paid for day care costs so what was the point? He joined the Army when Fox1 was 9 months old. Part of the reason was so I could continue to stay at home without worrying about money. I did apply for a part time job here and there but nothing worked out for them or for me. Day care costs are extreme with multiple kids.
Then when Fox1 was about 2 1/2 I was teaching him the alphabet. It gave me great joy to watch him learn, to be the one to help him do it. I started thinking about homeschooling. I gathered up all my reasons (yes there are a lot of them) and talked to Papa Fox. First thing he said was "I thought you were going to get a job." We were in a tight money spot at the time so that didn't surprise me. We talked for a few months about it and he agreed to try it out. There went my plans for getting a job, at least for as long as I'm homeschooling. I hope to homeschool all my boys completely through school. For the next fifteen, sixteen, seventeen years (It's not uncommon for homeschoolers to graduate high school a year or two early.) I will be helping my children along the path of education.
But what happens after that? When all three kids are (hopefully) out of the house I will be 40 years old. I have no actual job experience, only small "for cash" jobs I had in high school. Honestly, I would be an extremely happy person if I never had to work. If I have to for financial reasons I will. But I would love to do volunteer work, especially with pregnant and parenting teens like what I did in Oklahoma. I think it would be great to do something I really want to do and get paid in enjoyment.
So I guess I plan to stay at home forever if financially possible. Papa Fox works for money, I work for our home. Besides caring for the kids, I run errands, clean, cook, handle finances, I even get handy and fix things from time to time. By being at home, I can devote some time to finding ways to save money. I help our Papa Fox when I can, like this morning fixing his lunch. I may not get paid but I am still working for my family. Even with the kids gone I would have "work" to do, just less. I feel a little guilty about choosing to SAH while my husband is working so hard to support us even though he has no problem doing that. But then I remember that Papa Fox is following his childhood dream of being a police officer. Once he hits the streets, he's going to enjoy his work so much. This is like his volunteer work, only they are paying him for it too.
But of course I haven't seen any of that almost $117,000 SAHM's supposively earn.
How long do you plan to stay at home? Do you have a set time line or are you just going with the flow?