For those of you who may not know who Katy Perry is, the song "I Kissed a Girl and I Liked It" may ring a bell. The reason why I bring her and that song up is because it was overplayed on the radio throughout the summer, and probably still now. (The video clip is at the bottom, if you've never heard or seen it before).
Anyway, it's not that I have anything against the gay and lesbian community, because I don't at all. However, when videos like this are played on TV shows for young kids, such as TRL and So You Think You Can Dance, and I hear little ten-year-olds skipping down the street, belting out the lyrics, I get pissed off to the max. When I was ten years old, my parents restricted a lot of the music I'd listened to. I couldn't listen to music with curse words and especially music about same-sex sexual experiences. I couldn't even watch movies that had anything to do with kissing, sex, etc...
Some people don't think it's bad because yeah, I guess the song could be worse, but children listen to this stuff. Sure, they may not fully understand the situation, but still... my friends' parents were completely shocked when they heard this song on the radio. I guess this is how the music industry is evolving. No wonder why some kids are sexually active at such an early age...
Do you monitor what your children are listening to and/or watching (music videos on TRL, for example)? Is there any music you won't let them listen to? How do you decide what music to allow or restrict?
Well, my children are 3 and 1 so right now it's alot of ABCs and Twinkle Twinkle, but I listen to country music and have already learned that I have to be careful which songs I allow to be on when my son is in the car because he now sings Taylor Swift's Our Song. Not that I have a problem with that one - just the idea of him singing some other songs that I listen to - I Love This Bar, for example - bothers me quite alot.
When my children are older I will definitely be listening to and restricting music - I do not want them listening to songs about sex, drugs, etc. It's just not necessary when there is so much other music that would be perfectly acceptable for them to listen to (and that I wouldn't be embarrassed if they began singing aloud around other people).
Right now my daughter is 3, so I really don't listen to the radio at all around her. We've bought a bunch of pop cd's to listen to in the car. We all like a good bit of the Disney pop stars. I turn off or avoid any music I come across that has foul language or is too sexual in nature (no matter the orientation). As she gets older I'm going to try to keep track of what she's watching and listening to and attempting to censor things from her myself. And I'll give her more leniency when I feel she's ready to handle it. I can't set an age right now, because it will all be dependent on her and her maturity level.
Currently I'm dealing with a 2 year old who loves to watch Barney, Callou and Curious George. Whenever I plug the TV off she's really rebellious and wants it her way. I know at this stage I can enforce what she will be watching and listening but as she goes through the adolescent years I'm not so sure how to tolerate that yet but her dad and myself will have strict guidelines and rules by then. Thanks for the post though, it's a very helpful insight to think about.
I'm a first-time father-to-be, so things like this interest me.
I'd like to ask you, babyfever25: if Katy Perry had instead sung, "I Kissed A Boy (And I Think I Liked It)," would you have had the same concerns? P.S. I don't listen to the radio much, but I've heard about the song, and looked up the lyrics. Wow, is this song stupid! I mean, I worry that if I listened to it too many times, I'd leak I.Q. points.
all music has an age that is appropriate listening to. And I still limit my 16yo.
When my son (15 now) became enamoured of heavy metal music, I was a little concerned. I am no prude, but really, this stuff can be scaaarryy. My husband and I listened to a lot of the music (btw, my hub is a musician - always music in our house) and screened what we could. I was concerned about some of the messages that this type of music can convey. And, I SHOULD be concerned and try and screen what he downloads onto his I-POD or what he is watching on You-Tube. We have talked about my concerns, and I have asked him what attracts him to the music. I realized that it wasn't any demonistic message or dark and scary place he was going - he loved the music and even laughed about a lot of the lyrics, bands, costumes, etc. I'm not saying that some kids aren't drawn into messages or whatnot, but you do have to pay attention and know what is going on, and make a judgement from what you see and hear.
My 5 year old is like a recorder. We have to pay attention to what is on the radio and tv for fear she might repeat it in front of family or at school. We have let her know that there are cartoons that she is not allowed to watch and that if they come on to let us know so we can change it. Surprisingly she does just that. Some of the cartoons are not really that bad, its just that we don't want her going around with potty humor on the brain.
I try to be very careful when it comes to listening to the radio. I think messages about sex (and relationships), violence, drugs, etc. are unnecessary for my almost-two-year-old to be listening to. There are plenty of other things that are good she could be listening to.
Same with TV. I don't watch my shows unless she is napping or in bed. Some things just aren't appropriate for children. Why force them to grow up so fast by exposing them to things they're not ready to understand? Every child is different...so I can't really project what age I'll be letting my daughter watch/listen more mature messages. But I definitely think it's important to care about limiting your child's access to those things.
We are careful about everything that enters our home, and music won't be an exception. Too many people wonder what is wrong with the kids in our society - just look to the media!! I was brought up in a similar home and until I was old enough to have those messages in my life, I realized I didn't really want them to be, anyway. I hope the same is true for my kids.
Yes, I do monitor why my children watch and listen to.
We only allow Christian music in our house.
I also monitor closely what they watch and there are many many things on even "Childrens" networks that they are not allowed to watch.
We don't have cable or even rabbit ears at the moment. So we watch dvds, and restrict our own viewing time for certain shows when our kids are asleep (The Office, for example--we childproof each season and know what they can or cannot see). I'm glad that I don't have to monitor the t.v. As for music, I listen to the radio and I'm very aware of what I'm listening to. I despise most of the popular music today because it's not original. If I want to listen to a band that sounds like The Cure, then I'll just listen to The Cure...so my kids don't hear any hip hop or rap or even alternative rock. I listen to the 80s station mostly and find myself changing the station because I don't want my girls repeating things out of context.
Probably the one band that I don't censor is U2. My 3 year old can pretty much identify them on the radio and sings along.
When my family did have cable, we found the commercials a bigger problem than the shows we watched. One night we were watching "Whose Line is it Anyway?" on ABC Family channel. Commercial break. Beautiful classical music starts playing. Angie stops what she's doing to look...it was the commercial for the movie "Hostel." We scrambled for the remote. I was very irritated because it was supposed to be family programming.
I have 5 children ages 11 to 3. We do NOT listen to secular music at all. Not even mom and dad. We listen to Christian music only. We do listen to Classical (my kids hated it, but are starting to ask for it). They listen to air1.com at home. I dont care if secular music is talking a bout kissing boys, girls, or whatever else. Too many lyrics are about sex, drugs, and a whole bunch of nasty stuff. Its disgusting. What is even more disgusting to me, is that some people don't care if their kids listen to it or not. They have no idea what is being said. I love the positive aspects of Christian music. It just makes you feel good, and doesn't put all that dirty trash in your minds. With having a 3 year old we listen to A LOT of veggie tales (even my 11 year old loves them)
My mom didn't let us watch MTV growing up, it was all VH-1 because back then they played adult easy listening. That was also all we could listen to on the radio. I once got in trouble for singing a line from Joan Jett's "I Love Rock and Roll." I only knew it because my daa listened to whatever he wanted regardless of us being around or not. That was 25+ years ago when music wasn't nearly as bad as it is today. I will definitely restrict my daughter's music when the time comes. I ask my husband not to play certain music when I'm in the car because I just don't want to hear it or I don't want our baby to hear it. While I think there is no substitute for involved parenting, music can definitely be influencing on children (and adults).
I find this kind of offensive. My mom did put restrictions on what I listened to as a kid, but if you get too sensitive about it then you will end up sticking your child in a padded room with ear plugs. There is something in every song worth censoring. Every song has some reference to sex or drugs or fatalities. I think It is ok for a kid to have free license to listen to any music (within reason) as long as they understand that music is just that, music. That it is not the correct way to talk to people or the way life functions. Its almost like you are afraid to let your children know that homosexuals exist. And unless you want future generations to start with descrimination against homosexual people, I suggest you expose them to the real world so there are no life-alterring surprises.
because a lot of songs do have references to sex or drugs or fatalities or profanity, parents should censor some extremely horrible songs, and allow some "not so bad" songs to filter thru with A LOT of parental guidance. this way, the kids know there's bad stuff in the songs and should not be followed, at the same time having enough free will to choose what they want to listen. but i would not allow my future kids to listen to rap, period!
I don't have kids of my own but my parents never censored anything I watched or listen to, they just taught me what was morally right and what was not, what behaviors were acceptable and what was not, and as I grew up I understood why some songs were wrong and didn't listen to them, the same with tv shows. I'm sure it depends on the kid, but for me, teaching me what was right and wrong -- rather than trying to push me away from certain songs because mommy said so made a much bigger impact. I'm now an adult and those ideals have stuck with me, so even when they're not around, the tv is on shows that I know they would approve of and because they taught the morals to me and not just a simple "because I said so", the reasons behind not watching such shows went far beyond a fear of my parents watching over my shoulder. Since I'm not a parent, I don't know that my advice is very useful, but I think if morals and self-control are taught to children at an early age, rather than just "mom says no" they'll grow up to follow such rules even when mom is not around.
Young children should definitely be limited in what they're allowed to hear/watch. PS I absolutely LOVE that Katy Perry song!!! It's so catchy! It's not the worst of songs by any means, though. Are people offended by it because it promotes bisexual curiosity & drunkenness? What if the same words were sung by a male? I sometimes wonder if people are homophobic or just prude (for lack of a better word).
If I did have kids, I would let them listen to anything except rap music. Because it glorifies sexism, drug abuse, violence, same-sex relations, and being black.
I think it's kinda disgusting that music videos where girls wear very little clothing get put on music channels so much before watershed... the result is 12-year-olds thinking it's perfectly acceptable to wear skirts that hardly cover their asses and skimpy tops.
I didn't grow up with music channels... I grew up listening to whatever my mum had playing in her car.
@AdviceHunter@xanga - I think your comment was right on. So much of why it's good to be careful what your kids hear and see is because of their love to repeat things. They don't understand what much of the adult language in music means and so when a 6 yr old sings something like "hey baby baby sexy" while rotating his hips, it comes across very wrong, when he's just repeating what he heard/saw. Kids don't need to be punished for such behavior, but rather taught what is ok and what isn't. And if you monitor it from the start (including how parents speak to each other and others) then there's less backtracking later!
My son is only 9 months old and already I censor what goes on our TV and car radio. I wait until he is in bed to watch my shows that are innapropriate (pretty much the only shows of "mine" I watch in front of him are 7th Heaven, Food Network, and TLC shows like Jon and Kate). In the car I also only listen to country (unless it's not a good song), Christian or easy listening. I purchased some childrens' nursery rhyme CDs as well as the Baby Mozart, Beethoven, etc. cds and Jeremiah LOVES those.
Sheltering your kids will lead to rebellion of the worst kind, and a TOTAL shock when they get out into the real "secular" world.
The world isn't all "Jesus loves me, this I know."
But of course, proper caution should be taken. There's a difference between raising your kids right and sheltering.
Hmm... I did make sure my little brother and sister were never listening to bad music or watching inappropriate tv shows.
I'm not a mother, so I might not make any sense right now, since I don't have any children.
I think that there's a difference between not allowing your 8-year old to listen to Katy Perry and raising your children the right way.
That being said, I think that you can't shelter your children from everything. Eventually, they're going to see/listen to some things that may not be the best. But, that's okay. They need to know that there are things and people in the world who aren't good.
That might not make any sense, but it's just what I think. You can't shelter your children from everything.
by babyfever25
For those of you who may not know who Katy Perry is, the song "I Kissed a Girl and I Liked It" may ring a bell. The reason why I bring her and that song up is because it was overplayed on the radio throughout the summer, and probably still now. (The video clip is at the bottom, if you've never heard or seen it before). 
Comments (81)
Well, my children are 3 and 1 so right now it's alot of ABCs and Twinkle Twinkle, but I listen to country music and have already learned that I have to be careful which songs I allow to be on when my son is in the car because he now sings Taylor Swift's Our Song. Not that I have a problem with that one - just the idea of him singing some other songs that I listen to - I Love This Bar, for example - bothers me quite alot.
When my children are older I will definitely be listening to and restricting music - I do not want them listening to songs about sex, drugs, etc. It's just not necessary when there is so much other music that would be perfectly acceptable for them to listen to (and that I wouldn't be embarrassed if they began singing aloud around other people).
Right now my daughter is 3, so I really don't listen to the radio at all around her. We've bought a bunch of pop cd's to listen to in the car. We all like a good bit of the Disney pop stars. I turn off or avoid any music I come across that has foul language or is too sexual in nature (no matter the orientation). As she gets older I'm going to try to keep track of what she's watching and listening to and attempting to censor things from her myself. And I'll give her more leniency when I feel she's ready to handle it. I can't set an age right now, because it will all be dependent on her and her maturity level.
Currently I'm dealing with a 2 year old who loves to watch Barney, Callou and Curious George. Whenever I plug the TV off she's really rebellious and wants it her way. I know at this stage I can enforce what she will be watching and listening but as she goes through the adolescent years I'm not so sure how to tolerate that yet but her dad and myself will have strict guidelines and rules by then. Thanks for the post though, it's a very helpful insight to think about.
I'm a first-time father-to-be, so things like this interest me.
I'd like to ask you, babyfever25: if Katy Perry had instead sung, "I Kissed A Boy (And I Think I Liked It)," would you have had the same concerns?
P.S. I don't listen to the radio much, but I've heard about the song, and looked up the lyrics. Wow, is this song stupid! I mean, I worry that if I listened to it too many times, I'd leak I.Q. points.
all music has an age that is appropriate listening to. And I still limit my 16yo.
When my son (15 now) became enamoured of heavy metal music, I was a little concerned. I am no prude, but really, this stuff can be scaaarryy. My husband and I listened to a lot of the music (btw, my hub is a musician - always music in our house) and screened what we could. I was concerned about some of the messages that this type of music can convey. And, I SHOULD be concerned and try and screen what he downloads onto his I-POD or what he is watching on You-Tube. We have talked about my concerns, and I have asked him what attracts him to the music. I realized that it wasn't any demonistic message or dark and scary place he was going - he loved the music and even laughed about a lot of the lyrics, bands, costumes, etc. I'm not saying that some kids aren't drawn into messages or whatnot, but you do have to pay attention and know what is going on, and make a judgement from what you see and hear.
My 5 year old is like a recorder. We have to pay attention to what is on the radio and tv for fear she might repeat it in front of family or at school. We have let her know that there are cartoons that she is not allowed to watch and that if they come on to let us know so we can change it. Surprisingly she does just that. Some of the cartoons are not really that bad, its just that we don't want her going around with potty humor on the brain.
I try to be very careful when it comes to listening to the radio. I think messages about sex (and relationships), violence, drugs, etc. are unnecessary for my almost-two-year-old to be listening to. There are plenty of other things that are good she could be listening to.
Same with TV. I don't watch my shows unless she is napping or in bed. Some things just aren't appropriate for children. Why force them to grow up so fast by exposing them to things they're not ready to understand? Every child is different...so I can't really project what age I'll be letting my daughter watch/listen more mature messages. But I definitely think it's important to care about limiting your child's access to those things.
We are careful about everything that enters our home, and music won't be an exception. Too many people wonder what is wrong with the kids in our society - just look to the media!! I was brought up in a similar home and until I was old enough to have those messages in my life, I realized I didn't really want them to be, anyway. I hope the same is true for my kids.
Yes, I do monitor why my children watch and listen to.
We only allow Christian music in our house.
I also monitor closely what they watch and there are many many things on even "Childrens" networks that they are not allowed to watch.
We don't have cable or even rabbit ears at the moment. So we watch dvds, and restrict our own viewing time for certain shows when our kids are asleep (The Office, for example--we childproof each season and know what they can or cannot see). I'm glad that I don't have to monitor the t.v. As for music, I listen to the radio and I'm very aware of what I'm listening to. I despise most of the popular music today because it's not original. If I want to listen to a band that sounds like The Cure, then I'll just listen to The Cure...so my kids don't hear any hip hop or rap or even alternative rock. I listen to the 80s station mostly and find myself changing the station because I don't want my girls repeating things out of context.
Probably the one band that I don't censor is U2. My 3 year old can pretty much identify them on the radio and sings along.
When my family did have cable, we found the commercials a bigger problem than the shows we watched. One night we were watching "Whose Line is it Anyway?" on ABC Family channel. Commercial break. Beautiful classical music starts playing. Angie stops what she's doing to look...it was the commercial for the movie "Hostel." We scrambled for the remote. I was very irritated because it was supposed to be family programming.
I have 5 children ages 11 to 3. We do NOT listen to secular music at all. Not even mom and dad. We listen to Christian music only. We do listen to Classical (my kids hated it, but are starting to ask for it). They listen to air1.com at home. I dont care if secular music is talking a bout kissing boys, girls, or whatever else. Too many lyrics are about sex, drugs, and a whole bunch of nasty stuff. Its disgusting. What is even more disgusting to me, is that some people don't care if their kids listen to it or not. They have no idea what is being said. I love the positive aspects of Christian music. It just makes you feel good, and doesn't put all that dirty trash in your minds. With having a 3 year old we listen to A LOT of veggie tales (even my 11 year old loves them)
My mom didn't let us watch MTV growing up, it was all VH-1 because back then they played adult easy listening. That was also all we could listen to on the radio. I once got in trouble for singing a line from Joan Jett's "I Love Rock and Roll." I only knew it because my daa listened to whatever he wanted regardless of us being around or not. That was 25+ years ago when music wasn't nearly as bad as it is today. I will definitely restrict my daughter's music when the time comes. I ask my husband not to play certain music when I'm in the car because I just don't want to hear it or I don't want our baby to hear it. While I think there is no substitute for involved parenting, music can definitely be influencing on children (and adults).
I find this kind of offensive. My mom did put restrictions on what I listened to as a kid, but if you get too sensitive about it then you will end up sticking your child in a padded room with ear plugs. There is something in every song worth censoring. Every song has some reference to sex or drugs or fatalities. I think It is ok for a kid to have free license to listen to any music (within reason) as long as they understand that music is just that, music. That it is not the correct way to talk to people or the way life functions. Its almost like you are afraid to let your children know that homosexuals exist. And unless you want future generations to start with descrimination against homosexual people, I suggest you expose them to the real world so there are no life-alterring surprises.
because a lot of songs do have references to sex or drugs or fatalities or profanity, parents should censor some extremely horrible songs, and allow some "not so bad" songs to filter thru with A LOT of parental guidance. this way, the kids know there's bad stuff in the songs and should not be followed, at the same time having enough free will to choose what they want to listen. but i would not allow my future kids to listen to rap, period!
I don't have kids of my own but my parents never censored anything I watched or listen to, they just taught me what was morally right and what was not, what behaviors were acceptable and what was not, and as I grew up I understood why some songs were wrong and didn't listen to them, the same with tv shows. I'm sure it depends on the kid, but for me, teaching me what was right and wrong -- rather than trying to push me away from certain songs because mommy said so made a much bigger impact. I'm now an adult and those ideals have stuck with me, so even when they're not around, the tv is on shows that I know they would approve of and because they taught the morals to me and not just a simple "because I said so", the reasons behind not watching such shows went far beyond a fear of my parents watching over my shoulder. Since I'm not a parent, I don't know that my advice is very useful, but I think if morals and self-control are taught to children at an early age, rather than just "mom says no" they'll grow up to follow such rules even when mom is not around.
Young children should definitely be limited in what they're allowed to hear/watch.
PS I absolutely LOVE that Katy Perry song!!! It's so catchy! It's not the worst of songs by any means, though. Are people offended by it because it promotes bisexual curiosity & drunkenness? What if the same words were sung by a male? I sometimes wonder if people are homophobic or just prude (for lack of a better word).
If I did have kids, I would let them listen to anything except rap music. Because it glorifies sexism, drug abuse, violence, same-sex relations, and being black.
I think it's kinda disgusting that music videos where girls wear very little clothing get put on music channels so much before watershed... the result is 12-year-olds thinking it's perfectly acceptable to wear skirts that hardly cover their asses and skimpy tops.
I didn't grow up with music channels... I grew up listening to whatever my mum had playing in her car.
@AdviceHunter@xanga - I think your comment was right on. So much of why it's good to be careful what your kids hear and see is because of their love to repeat things. They don't understand what much of the adult language in music means and so when a 6 yr old sings something like "hey baby baby sexy" while rotating his hips, it comes across very wrong, when he's just repeating what he heard/saw. Kids don't need to be punished for such behavior, but rather taught what is ok and what isn't. And if you monitor it from the start (including how parents speak to each other and others) then there's less backtracking later!
My son is only 9 months old and already I censor what goes on our TV and car radio. I wait until he is in bed to watch my shows that are innapropriate (pretty much the only shows of "mine" I watch in front of him are 7th Heaven, Food Network, and TLC shows like Jon and Kate). In the car I also only listen to country (unless it's not a good song), Christian or easy listening. I purchased some childrens' nursery rhyme CDs as well as the Baby Mozart, Beethoven, etc. cds and Jeremiah LOVES those.
My only vice in front of Jeremiah is Dr. Laura!!!
@diamondICE@xanga - I feel the exact same way about that song!
God, guys, that song is so tongue-in-cheek.
Sheltering your kids will lead to rebellion of the worst kind, and a TOTAL shock when they get out into the real "secular" world.
The world isn't all "Jesus loves me, this I know."
But of course, proper caution should be taken. There's a difference between raising your kids right and sheltering.
Hmm... I did make sure my little brother and sister were never listening to bad music or watching inappropriate tv shows.
I'm not a mother, so I might not make any sense right now, since I don't have any children.
I think that there's a difference between not allowing your 8-year old to listen to Katy Perry and raising your children the right way.
That being said, I think that you can't shelter your children from everything. Eventually, they're going to see/listen to some things that may not be the best. But, that's okay. They need to know that there are things and people in the world who aren't good.
That might not make any sense, but it's just what I think. You can't shelter your children from everything.