by Mama Fox
I have been talking online with a few vegetarian/vegan (aka veg*n) mothers and lately, I've been hearing the same rant over and over. Omnivore parents accusing the veg*n parents of forcing their kids to not eat meat. Okay, what about forcing kids
to eat meat? Why the double standard?
Many veg*n mothers, even with omnivore husbands, don't cook meat. That's understandable of course. So the family eats meatless together. I'm sure there's even a bit of "Eat your vegetables, please" going on, just like "normal" families. Just because meat isn't an option at home doesn't mean that their parents are so horribly against meat that they are forbidden to ever eating it. Of course there will be extreme cases, but a majority of the veg*n families I know of, the kids decided on their own to either eat meat or not. I don't see any forcing going on.Â
I do cook meat. Papa Fox has no problem cooking it for himself but I don't have (much of) a problem with it, and it's easy enough to do it in the afternoon and throw it in the fridge so he can put in on his dinner that night. Because it's in the house, the boys have the choice. 99% of the time, they don't want meat. While it does make me happy that they are choosing to eat vegetarian, I'm not going to freak out if they don't. That was Papa Fox and I's agreement: no forcing either way. We will let the kids decide.
I do have a slight problem with feeding my kids something that I wouldn't eat myself, but I also realize that they have their own opinions based on the information they have, and they should have the right to choose. (They also like things like cottage cheese, which I would not touch, veg*n or not.) It was the same before I went vegetarian. If they didn't want what I made for dinner, that's fine. Their other choices were cold cereal or PB&J sandwich. I will not cook a completely separate meal for them, but I also don't cook much that they won't eat. I am not going to force them to eat anything they don't want to. I wouldn't want anyone else telling me what to eat or not eat so I give them the same respect. All parents should.
I also find it slightly funny that a few weeks ago we were walking through Walmart and my 4 year old was talking about chicken taquitos. He loves taquitos so he was just babbling along, but then he said fairly loudly, "It's not nice to eat chickens." I laughed very hard. Of course, that wouldn't stop him from eating them if we bought them, but I think it's funny that he said it. I'm not forcing my children into my views. They understand that I don't eat meat because I feel that eating animals is wrong. I have given them age appropriate information when it comes up, but that's about it. I hope that one day they will decide on their own to be veg*n with me, but if not, they are still my children and I love them... even if they eat meat. Haha!
What's the meal policy in your family? How much say do your kids have in deciding what they want/don't want to eat?
Comments (42)
I'm one of those kids who was raised with all kinds of foods being served. My parents love all sorts of foods, many international, and we're lucky enough to be able to afford good ingredients and also be very good cooks. I wasn't raised on white bread, presliced cheese, miracle whip, fast food, etc. and to this day I despise almost everything of that type. However I love all kinds of indian/latin/italian/etc foods and especially vegetables and fruits. In 7th grade I decided that I couldn't live with myself if I supported the meat industry and became vegetarian. My parents must have been quietly skeptical at first of a 13-year-old swearing never to eat meat or gelatin, but they went along with it and have never given me a hard time.
My opinion is that if circumstances permit kids should be raised on healthy homecooked meals. If they want things that don't fit that category then they need to ask for it, not be offered it. Kids will eat healthily if healthy food tastes good and is readily availabe.
Besides, apples are the best school lunches ever. They're easy, healthy, and fill you up without having to eat much.I'm a vegetarian.. If I had kids, I would probably make vegetarian meals. If they want to eat meat, I'm not going to force them to be vegetarian.
i think it's ridiculous to not give your kids meat growing up, unless they refuse it and accept an alternative. But then again, i think it's ridiculous to think that eating meat is bad or wrong. people are so spoiled. there are people in other countries who would love to get our (U.S.) quality meat, processed or not.
@Seargent_Peppers@xanga - it's not. veg*n is referring to the wide range of people who follow any form of vegetarianism. this includes veganism, but it's not JUST that.
I plan on raising my son to eat vegitarian, since that's what I choose to do, but I'm not going to stop him if he wants to eat otherwise. It's unfair to force someone to eat what they don't want to, or to refuse them something that they want to try.
I am not entirely certain about what kids should eat, but one thing I am sure of... Kids should not eat other kids... That is just wrong... except maybe in some canabilistic cultures, then I guess it's ok, but not in my house!
My daughter just turned a year old, and up until about 2 weeks ago ate whatever I put in front of her. Now, she's asserting her newfound 'toddlerhood'... and will only eat a select menu of foods. This is fine right now as I am still breastfeeding.
That being said .... we eat meat. God gave us the fruits, vegetables, and beasts of the field to nurish our bodies ... so I eat them. But, I have vegetarian friends and I see nothing fundamentally wrong with choosing to not eat meat.
I try to offer a balanced diet to my family. Lots of colors, lots of vitamins. I try to buy organic whenever I can so that my DD isn't ingesting crap. My daughter has enough energy on her own, so she doesn't get junk food or sugary stuff. The one exception was on her birthday I made a carrot cake, made with applesauce (homemade) instead of oil.
When she gets older, I will encourage her to eat a variety of healthy foods... just like her father and I do. I will not use the 'because I said so' monologue...but rather try to explain 'because it is healthy and will help you grow'. We will try foods several times before we decide they are 'yucky'. I will also 'hide' foods in other foods she likes if she is not getting enough of a particular food group. Balance. Life is about balance and so is nutrition.
I will do my best to teach my daughter to have a healthy relationship with food. Food is for nutrition. Food can and does taste good ... but it is not to comfort us, it is not to make us feel better, it is not to take away some heartache... it is to provide nutrients to our bodies.
I will allow 'treats' ... but not as rewards. A treat will just be that .... a treat.
I will not force my daughter to 'finish her plate'... because frankly, the children in Africa will not get her dinner whether she finishes it or not. I also understand that children go through times of great growth and they consume everything in sight ... and times of slowed growth where it seems as if they eat nothing at all. Who am I to tell my daugther what is going on in her stomach. I will however, not keep a 24 hour kitchen. I will ensure there are healthy snacks available to her that she can get herself when she is hungry. But I will not make seperate meals at all hours of the day and night.
I believe it is our responsibility as parents to provide our children with the resources and information to make good decisions. If I was a vegetarian then my child would be a vegetarian until an age where he/she could make the decision for themselves.
@dianadelosmuertos@xanga - But......why is it censored?
Parents I think are going to feed their kids what they eat themselves. Most kids seem to make their own choices about what they want to eat, meat or not. But force feeding kids is really messed up, and can cause obesity and a difficult relationship with food in general.
My mom's thing when I was growing up was that if there was something on my plate that I didn't think I'd like, she'd make sure I'd at least sample it so I gained an ability to try all sorts of foods through this method. If there was something to eat that I knew I wouldn't like, I just learned to eat around it. What my mom cooked was what was for dinner, and there was no way she was going to cook extra food and encourage picky behaviour.
@Seargent_Peppers@xanga - did you not read my post? IT'S NOT CENSORED. IT IS A SHORTENING OF ALL TYPES OF VEGETARIANISM.
vegans suck lol.
<3
i think kids should be informed as to what theyre eating, but their decisions should be thought out. i was a vegetarian, but i don't like being rude to people serving me food or not eating something someone made. so i became a flexitarian instead. it essentially means that i eat vegetarian, unless absolutely necessary to eat something else. so if i'm visiting or it's a dinner at my grandparent's i eat a little of the meat to be polite and then eat what i want aftewards. i don't see a problem allowing children to make their own choices, it just bothers me when the choices aren't respected. my parents would not make me vegetarian meals and i was not allowed to search cabinets for food after dinner. so i just stopped eating it. i would sit at the table until they said i wouldn't have to eat it and stopped serving it to me. i think there has to be compromizing and nothing is ever easy.
I'm not a mom, hopefully not for a while, and my family doesn't have a huge problem with me being a vegetarian. I cook my own meals and they cook theirs. Separate times. We aren't really that connected. My dad is always working and we don't really have a dinner table set up so we just lost that tradition a long time ago.
I have been a veg. for almost two years and I don't have any reason or wanting to stop. I will stop when and if I do get pregnant, because I will not force my kid into it, [and I probably will be wanting some chicken fingers and honey mustard if I am pregnant. ha!]
After that, I will become one again and if my child chooses to be one too, then so be it.
I really think this is the one thing that shouldn't be forced on anybody. To me, being a vegetarian is me being healthier to my body and cleaner. I lost thirty pounds just by doing it and drinking more water.
But kudo's for you! I know how tough it is to live in a house full of meat eaters. my boyfriend is a HUGE lover of bacon...he's even wrapped it around a steak and ate chocolate with it.
Disgusting!
It's fine to have your children be vegetarian with you, as long as you are educated about nutritional requirements of children and make sure that they are getting everything they need from other sources. You do sound like a wise parent - but unfortunately, there are many out there who don't see the importance of information. Wasn't it just last year, that a couple was charged with starving their infant, because they didn't want their child to drink milk? I think that is why people tend to be judgmental - there are a lot of idiots out there getting a lot of publicity for doing stupid things with their kids.
@flowerchild80@xanga - I believe that was a few years ago. Very sad and obviously they are extreme looneys of the vegan world.
You are right though, all parents (veg*n or not) should have a basic understanding of nutrition. I took a health and wellness class in high school and have researched a bit on my own. I feel confident that my children have everything that they need to grow happy and healthy. I just wish more parents would take the initiative and learn about that their body and their children's bodies need.
@sheikhbell@xanga - If you are going to bring God's design into the discussion...then you should realize that we were actually created as vegetarians. It was only after the Flood that God told Noah that meat was a food option. So ridiculing someone for being vegetarian as against God's design is silly!!
I do eat meat myself, though I consider myself more of a flexitarian than an omnivore...as the meat is not the main focus of a meal. Ideally, I'd be a vegetarian...but we don't live in an ideal world. I can't hardly even get my husband to eat fruits and veggies...so following a vegetarian menu would not be feasible. I do try to keep it from being the main focus in meals though.
@AnnaMayBeGrimmjow@xanga - But we are not those people. I don't believe it is selfish at all to refuse meat, when we have such an abundance of food here in America. Send the people that you are speaking of my meat. It doesn't bother me.