Wednesday, 30 July 2008
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My Mother-In-Law Is Coming to Town!
by Mama Koala
And that's great news! (No sarcasm here.) I recently blogged about deciding to move, and that day is approaching fast. Friday is our lightweight day. We'll be getting the keys to the new apartment, and moving in our clothes, blankets, baby toys, etc. Saturday is the big move. We've hired professional movers to handle all the heavy stuff, including furniture, books, and boxes upon boxes of miscellaneous stuff. Papa Koala and I have been so busy with work and Baby Koala that we honestly haven't had much free time to sit and pack. So far, we've got about 25 boxes stacked, but the place barely looks packed. My mother-in-law knows how busy we are, and changed her schedule around so that she and my teenage niece could come to help us with the sudden move.When I tell people that my mother-in-law is going to come and help us move, some people say "Oh good!" while others throw me a look of compassion and say "Oh man. Why?" From the different reactions that I get, it's easy to tell what kind of relationships they have with their in-laws. I've heard some really horrible stories about in-law conflicts. The stereotypical in-law relationship is not a positive one. The stereotype exists for a reason, I know, but it doesn't always have to be true. When Papa Koala and I got married, I quickly realized how different his family was from the family I grew up in. My mother-in-law and I had our differences, and we've had a few misunderstandings over the years. There was even a time when I thought she hated me, but thankfully, that passed after a few months. Through the ups and downs of trying to understand each other, we've actually gotten closer, and have developed an appreciation for the good qualities in each other. Sure we still have our differences, but I think we just choose not to focus on them.
I'm thankful that I can honestly say that I enjoy my mother-in-law's company and wish that she lived closer to us. While she is not an affectionate or expressive person (this took some getting used to, since my mom is very different), I have learned the ways that she shows her love, and have been amazed by the sacrifices she will make for her children. Having her stay with us these next few days will make it so much easier for us to pack, unpack, and settle down in our new apartment. It's also very exciting that Baby Koala will get to spend so much time with her grandmother in our home. Baby Koala bonds quickly with people that way, and I've been waiting for an opportunity like this for them.
How is your relationship with your in-laws? How has it changed over time?
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Comments (9)
It's been three years and so far, the relationships have stayed the same. I like his mother a lot and enjoy spending time at her house, but as for his father, I put up with him. I hate the way he raised his sons, I hate his racist attitude, I hate how he is not generous when my parents have done so much for us. The worst of it is that my husband can't understand the reasons why I dislike his father. He doesn't understand that the way he was raised was less than ideal and I so wish that I could somehow make him see from my point of view.
mine is not bad just weird, my family is very into being a close family and going on vacation togeather and calling eachother just to see how the week has been and things liek that where his family calls when something happens or they need something never just to talk, there really are never "come on over for dinner" times or anything we have been married for 7 years and I am still trying to get used to it.
My relationship with my in-laws is good. Then again I don't get to see them all that often as they are out of the country currently learning another language and culture. I do love them...they showed me what a family is supposed to look like, and how they are supposed to treat each other. They are by no means perfect, but they are absolutely amazing...and incredibly supportive!
I have yet to meet my in-laws! They live in Chile and I live in the USA. I have talked to my mother-in-law and sister-in-law on the phone. It's difficult, because I only know a little bit of Spanish and they only know a little bit of English.They seem nice on the phone! So when I do get the chance to actually meet my in-laws, I'm confident we'll get along just fine.
Haha, I love my in-laws, if only for their entertainment value.
I get along pretty well with my mother-in-law, other than the fact that it really bugs me how much she seems to let her family walk all over her. I was astounded the first time I ate over there and they all just got up from the table, leaving everything for her to clean up. That has changed now, but she still seems to let people take advantage of her I think. I try not to. As for my father-in-law, neither my husband nor I like him very much. I could go on forever about why, but we'll just say that I put up with him and we try not to tell him off cuz' that wouldn't be good. We have just walked out a couple of times though.
I think my husand gets along OK with my parents. I know he finds my mother very entertaining sometimes, and can be quite annoyed by the yelling factor in their house sometimes (as am I), but I think he get along OK with them in general.
BEST OF LUCK WITH THE MOVE!!
I LOVE Tim's Mom and Grandma. It helps greatly that we all like each other as people...if we'd met without Tim's "help", we would have still become friends.
Previous in-laws and I have had fallings out, so I know exactly how lucky I am!
well, the boy and I arent married yet, but my future inlaws are an interesting bunch. My fiance grew up in a pretty bad situation and only just reconciled with his dad and stepmother, both of whom I get along okay with (its just really awkward) but his mom is really crazy. She's got a very low iq and her whole family babies her for it and how she had cancer, and lets her rule over everyone. She had a brain tumor that messed her up, but they really shouldnt have let her get so out of control. Either way, he no longer speaks with her after receiving multiple horrid phone calls from her threatening and cursing at him for no reason, saying he's a horrible son and how she wished she just went ahead and got the abortion she wanted or whatnot (i doubt she ever wanted it, she just wanted to hurt him) so needless to say, his side of the family is more distant.
We basically live at my parents house though! He gets along with my parents great and besides the few little typical parent fights, all is dandy. :)I have a decent relationship with my inlaws. It was hard at first because we had to get to know each other and learn how to accept each other's differences but we eventually did and when I had my son, he was her first priority and eventhough she never said that she loved us, she says it to my son all day long.
Like my aunt says, treat his parents the way you would want him to treat your parents.