Monday, 14 July 2008
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Cleaning-Up a Relationship
by Nurse Jenna
Today I am taking a break from being “NurseJenna.” Today I am “Just-Jenna” because I have a day off work. Or so I thought. I spend my days at work taking care of other people (and teaching nursing students), so a day off just for me is cherished time, as I know many of you feel the same. So what did I do on my day of leisure? I cleaned the kitchen, the bathroom, took out the trash and recycling, and did laundry. Sad, isn’t it? I am not going to complain about my life in general because it is fantastic—I travel a lot, eat at amazing restaurants, spend time with friends, see Broadway productions, train for my marathon, etc. But in general, I also work… a lot.So… what is your point, Non-Nurse Jenna? My point is this: I spend a lot of my “free-time” cleaning. I know, I know—join the club.
This is a big issue in my household. How messy is tolerable? My boyfriend and I disagree. I would by no means say I am a neat-freak; I am tidy. He, on the other hand, is what I would call a slob, or as my friends say—a typical guy. What is so frustrating to me is that he is not bothered by the mess, but I am. So who do you suppose winds up cleaning? Me! Why? Because I’m the only one who cares. I’ve tried the nagging approach, the nice approach, and even resorted to begging. Nothing seems to work. I can say that this is easily the biggest point of contention in our relationship. I’m frustrated by the mess; he’s frustrated by my frustration.
Is who-does-what with regard to cleaning a big relationship challenge for other people? Does anyone else find that your level of concern for the mess is not equal?
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Comments (106)
@NurseJenna - Hire a made, Problem solved...
You know us guys we got some pretty hefty solutions eh?
After reading this, I realize how lucky my husband and I are. Our threshold if cleanliness is about the same, and we share chores pretty evenly, without much nagging. I think the most helpful part is that we thank each other for cooking and cleaning and compliment each other on how good the food is, or how nice the place looks.
Of course, we've been married just under a year and don't have any kids yet. I'll check back in with ya in a couple of years.
Guys are guys, I say let it get so bad he gets so sick of it he has to clean it up even though you totally feel like vomiting. It will happen.
easy! use sex as leverage.=)
My wife and I are the opposite of you and your boyfriend. I am the clean one and spend more time cleaning and doing housework. I guess each set up is different.
hehe, I find a similar situation between me and my parents concerning mowing the lawn.
We rarely have people over, partially because the inside of our house is a mess. So why do I need to keep the lawn mowed? Nobody ever even SEES our lawn...
(don't mind me, I'm just really behind on featured blogs)