Thursday, 10 July 2008
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Chores and Allowance
by Mama FoxPapa Fox and I have decided that it's time for Fox1 to start getting an allowance. We agreed that 50 cents a week is a good place to start. Fox1 has been playing around with money (aka treasure) since his 4th birthday. He got a pirate ship, complete with a small treasure chest. I gave him some loose change we had around the house and he's been collecting money ever since. We've been talking about the coins, how much they are worth and what we can buy with them. He recently found a ziplock of pennies that I was planning on taking to the bank. This weekend, we'll make that trip together.
My views on allowance are different than some. Fox1 won't get money for helping around the house. He does chores because he is part of this family the same way Papa Fox and I do. Heck, I would love to get paid for all the stuff I do around here. Haha! His allowance is mainly a teaching tool, to show him the value of money and how to spend it wisely.Tonight we will be going to the store (we FINALLY got paid) and he'll make his first purchase, a box of strawberry Whoppers. He wanted some last time we were at the store and I promised him that next time we went, I would help him count out enough money and he can buy it himself. He is very excited about it but I'm prepared for the meltdown when he realizes that he doesn't get the money back. I don't think he quite understands that part.
Doing chores is a part of life. I'm not about to let my boys slide through childhood without some basic skills. I hope their future wives thank me. Haha! Fox1's chores are pretty simple right now, seeing as he is only 4. Fox2 helps him a little bit but his only chore is helping pick up toys.- Feed our cat and dog every morning and before bed.
- When finished eating, dishes go into the sink. They even help by taking mine and Papa Fox's dishes and putting them on the counter. (Plastic in the sink, glass on the counter. I've only had them break one bowl by forgetting that.)
- Clean up toys before bed. They clean up Fox3's room also if they helped mess it up.
- Dirty laundry into the hamper when you take it off.
They help out with other things when asked or when they want to. They both take a turn pushing the vacuum, they love spraying vinegar water so I can wipe off the mirrors and counters, Fox2 likes "sweeping" the kitchen and Fox1 makes sure lights are turned off when there's no one in the room.
As they get older, they will be helping me with washing dishes and laundry, dusting and vacuuming and the complete cleaning of their bathroom. Since I use only natural cleaners, I don't have to worry about them handling chemicals. Makes it a lot easier on me. Right now I'm pull 80% of the cleaning load, it's about time I start using child labor.
Do your kids get an allowance?
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Comments (20)
When me and my sister were children we did get an allowance, we did not buy much junk with it
Most of mine each week when I was younger was to get my ZX Spectrum fixed. I then started to save the rest.
We let the kids collect change they find around the house and put it in a piggy bank, but we don't really do allowances. We do show them how to count it, give them ideas of how much $1 or $5 actually buys (not much these days lol) A few days ago Dh actually suggested we start doing allowances for chores and I said no way, I expect the kids to do the chores because they are members of the household (that make the most mess lol), not just because they'll get money out of it. When I was a kid I started making money when I was old enough to babysit, and then more when I was old enough to work an over the table job. For not having had an allowance before I was 12 I think I did just fine managing money as a teen.
I think we will end up doing something along the lines of X-things are your responsibility, without cash payment and if you want to earn money, X-things can be done for spending money...there are some things that as female-head-of-household I deem "my duties", however I'm not above out-sourcing them to teach my child how to earn money for work. Things that fall into that catagory for me are, washing and vacuuming my vehicle, taking curtains down/washing them, washing windows, painting outside of their own room, etc.. I also plan on participating in our neighborhood's annual yardsale and teaching my child that they can sell things they no longer use for spending money and that whatever doesn't sell is given to kids less fortunate through charities; duel purpose!
yeah i don't think kids should get paid to help around the house. i think they should get paid if they go above and beyond thier normal daily chores. i have four kids, ranging from 16 to 7. my oldest is being paid right now to babysit. that's a call above and beyond in my house. my 13 will clean out the car, and get paid. my 10 year old will re organize the tupperware cupboard, and my 7 year old will clean off the back porch, sweeping and organizing the bikes, dusting off the spider webs. my kids get daily chores, like dishes, taking out the trash, picking up the living room and diningroom and closet, as well as maintaining thier bathroom and bedroom. (i'm not saying that i make them do all the grunt work, i get down and dirty and scub the toilets, laundry, mop the floors, dust the furniture, run the vacuum, you know things like that). anyway that's stuff they SHOULD be doing already, and like i said, i don't feel they should be paid for doing stuff they should already do. it's like paying them to brush thier teeth! I guess that being a single mum, i believe that everyone has a part to do, and everyone has to help. paid or not. it's not fair to ask them to do all the work, and it's certainly not fair to have me do everything too. so, we work out a system. we have family meetings 2-3 times a month and discuss things, what we want to change, what we should be doing, what's expected from everyone, including myself. it really does make the household work much more smoothly. oh, we always start our meetings by saying we are a what? a TEAM! and that means? WE WORK TOGETHER! it helps them remember that they aren't doing things all by themselves, it's helping each other out. and that's the most important thing....IMHO. :) the other thing too, is that maybe there is the thing about the age. if you have younger children, sure you can't push all sorts of chores on them, but one or two things to start and work your way up. then they can get the hang of it, so it's not such a big deal when they do get older and are really putting forth the effort. i always praise my kids for a job well done, and they get rewarded also in other ways, going to the drive in, eating fast food, renting thier fav movies, going on picnics or just giving them thier own space with firends and stuff. i think that all privleges and monies given should definitely be earned and not expected, which goes back to what i was saying about why i dont feel that kids should be given money to do the stuff they should already be doing. sorry for the ramble...this has always been something i feel strongly about....have a great day!
I don't pay my children to do chores around the house. I look at it this way... I'm teaching them that when they are out on their own no one is going to pay them to clean their own apartment or house. And if they don't clean their apartment or house they will live in filth. I've taught my children to clean from a very early age. Now that they are teenagers we all clean the house together as a family once or twice a week in about an hour and a half. I do not pick up after them. They make the mess, they clean it. And they get no money for it. However, if they volunteer to do something extra around the house, they are rewarded for it, whether it be monetary or special privledges.
I completely agree with you. I also don't think allowance should be tied to chores or housework... who's gonna be paying them an allowance when they're living on their own?? They need to start learning from the beginning that taking care of their home and environment is something that you do b/c it's necessary, not b/c you're gonna get some reward for it.
Hubby and I have talked some about allowances, when to start them and how to work it, not sure what we'll end up doing yet but I do like the idea of starting maybe in the teens at least, and giving them an amount along with the added responsibility of them being in charge of certain personal purchases, so that they have to start budgeting and figuring out how to deal with money.
Our children earn half their age. So if they are 6 they get $3. They are forced to save $1.50 of this in a bank account and they get the rest, they are encouraged to think about tithing and charities- but this is not forced because it needs to come from within.
We did start off making it chore based but changed our minds. They have daily chores they MUST get done, but the consequences are things like missing out on something rather than not earn money.
We wanted the children to understand that chores were a part of being a family. Having 5 children the work load can be steep. They all learned early on to help out, because that is what families do.
One thing I do, do sometimes, is if I want extra jobs done, then I will often put a list up on the fridge with the amount I am willing to pay for it and they put their names next to it if they want to do that.
I tend to do this around birthdays and Christmas to encourage gift giving/making.
Sometimes they just have to do the same 'list' jobs on top of their chores, because we just need to get the job done.
In my household, we use ChoreWars.com. With a 9 year old and a 11 year old in the house with just me, (add in that we're all geeks!) this systems seemed the most ideal. They earn experience points, get to fight 'monsters', watch their avatars get higher levels, and when they've collected enough gold (from their adventures), they get $5. This means they have non-monetary incentive to get things done daily with a reward that calculates over a longer period of time.
At what age, do you think, kids should start getting chores and how much should they get paid for it? When my little one gets big, I'm going to give her $1 a day, if she does all her chores and extra $2 a week, if she does them without being told.
I think it's great how you're raising your kids (: I have to say, I've never really gotten an allowance. If I ask for money, my parents would give it to me only if it's for a good cause like money for lunch or money for the movies. I don't ask very often though. I'd really like to have an allowance to have a little extra money in case of an emergency, but living a life without money is also great (: Money isn't really all that important.
M is too little for allowance, but we'll have to talk about it more. I agree about chores as something you need to do because you're part of the family who lives in the home. Mom and Dad doesn't get paid for chores, so kids shouldn't either. If they get jobs later on in life, and don't get the allowance anymore, they may not do the chores because there's no incentive for it then. I was just talking to a friend about how it used to be the thing that people didn't teach their kids that they can use the credit card for everything, but it seems to be the norm now to use your card. What should we do about that? Just thinking aloud, but if anyone has any tips or thoughts, please share.
I didn't know they make strawberry Whoppers. We'll have to keep an eye out.
I start off at age 7 I believe went I got my first pay day. It was $2.50 a week. Not too shabby, a candy bar a day or soda and chips and a candy bar all at once. I never learned the saving thing too well, I still dont 22 years later...LOL... j/k
I'm glad to see a lot of parents on here aren't giving their kids exorbitant allowances. When I was growing up, we started out getting $5 a MONTH, of which $1 went into our savings account and $1 went into the collection plate at church. It steadily increased to $20 a month in high school, and ended when we got our first jobs.
As many other people have said, we weren't paid per chore, but we did have chores that we were expected to do: dishes twice a week, clean rooms, vacuum, take out trash, etc. We weren't allowed to do anything fun until our chores and homework were done.
My parents were pretty firm about not giving us more than our allowances (would have been hard with three kids and a mortgage, anyway), but there were a few exceptions: good grades earned a bit of extra pocket money, and mom was usually good for a paperback or two when the book fair came to school.
I never really had an allowance per say and I learned how to manage money just fine. From seeing some of my older friends now that had allowances attached to chores, they tend to think money just appears because they're responsible adults now. Which, definitely, isn't the case.
I think it's good to teach money skills by giving a small amount every week, but attaching it to things they should be doing anyway definitely sends the wrong message!
K - I don't think that kids should get paid per chore they do, but I also don't like it when kids get an allowance for no apparent reason. (Which it doesn't sound like any of you are talking about that, but I know people who have done it.)
I do believe that kids should be a part of the household chores and understand that it really is just part of life. But I also don't see anything wrong with them believing it is because they do their chores that they get an allowance, cuz' they should also understand that money doesn't come free.
My kids do their chores...feeding the dog, helping seperate laundry (darks and lights and such), cleaning their rooms....even my 22 month old picks up his toys. Right now, they don't get an allowance. The issue has been raised in the last month or so by my oldest who is 8 and my hubby and I have not made a decision yet. I didn't grow up with an allowance...he did.
There seem to be so many kids today that have a sense of 'entightlment' - they just deserve to have everything and anything they want because they do and they shouldn't have to work an ounce for it. Unfortunately, there also seem to be a good number of parents who support this belief by doing exactly that - giving them everything and expecting nothing. (Once again, not saying anybody who commented sounds like that is what they are doing, just writing what I am thinking.)
So, I guess the moral of this obsenely long post is that I am undecided on the whole allowance bit yet...but enjoy reading other people's views on it.
I can say that i think a lot of people are wrong here.
My mother made me do things around the house that had nothing to do with me. I cleaned my room, my bathroom...the livingroom, the kitchen, my sisters room (cause she was "to young to do it right") I made my mothers bed, picked up after the dog, cleaned the dog, washed everyones cloths...and helped my brothers and sisters with their homework.
And while I was doing all of this? My mother was sitting at the computer desk playing some card game...
LadyValkyrie37 is the person that sparked my comment.
Your kids dont learn that someone will pay them to clean their own apartment someday. Your kids learn that in this world...you should get paid for what you do.
It took a lot, but I learned to not be such a doormat, and to say no to people.
But my other brothers and sisters were not so...smart?
My brother now works at a college where he is not being treated fairly, and not getting paid the amount he deserves...he has always been like that.
Because when he was growing up, and I moved out, everything fell on him. He had to do everything. He missed seeing his friends from time to time, and my mother never paid him or even said thank you!
So...personally, I dont think i'm stating a opinion...
Not paying your children, at least a LITTLE bit for chores around the house...could result in not so good personality traits someday.
Most of you parents that say you refuse to give your child a bit of money for chores...dont come crying to me when your kids dont have the guts to ask for a raise at work, or be able to say no to a coworker...cause it wont be my fault, it will be yours.
I agree with you that chores are just a part of living in a home, and that kids don't need to get paid for it. And I also agree that they should learn the value of money early on. My mom didn't really teach me about money (there usually was enough), and I'm really bad with money - when I have it, I spend it, and when I don't, well... sometimes I still spend it! I'm happy to say that I am currently out of debt, and that as soon as I get my MA-degree and find a job, we will be looking for a home to buy (we have a small downpayment saved up). Still, it's been a long road toward solvency...
@sidewayslife@xanga - I do also agree with your comment on "entitlement" - if I were to give my son anything he wanted, how is he going to learn that in the grown-up world, you can't always get what you want, and that you have to work in order to buy the stuff you want?
I'm a bit on the fence about allowances - I think when the time comes that UeberKid wants an allowance, we'll maybe do a bonus system: the things he messes up, he needs to clean - just a normal contribution to our household - but maybe he could earn cash by doing extra chores, like washing the car, things like that? Well, I have a bit of time to think about it - he's only 14 months old!
We have started to teach him to put away his toys every night before bed, and he's starting to get it. He loves throwing his things into the toy box (really, a large see-through drawer in our book case) and "parking" his cars in the cubby hole next to it. He also likes to help me unload the dishwasher - he hasn't broken anything yet! (Fingers crossed...)
I think it's very important to teach him HOW to pick up and clean things - for example, showing him that cars go with cars, and stuffed animals with stuffed animals, that sort of thing. It's a life skill I'm still developing, because when I was little, my mom used to organize and clean my bedroom while I was away! I'm sure it was must faster that way, but I never learnt to declutter, pick up, organize or clean because of that. So I'm wary of making that mistake with my son.
I don't see anything wrong with making children do chores without compensation. I also don't see anything wrong with paying them for it.
One prson said, "I'm teaching them that when they are out on their own no one is going to pay them to clean their own apartment or house." Wow, if my child is so stupid as to think that when he's an adult, than he is beyond any help I can give him outside of sending him to a therapist. Seriously, any adult I've ever met who was paid for chores as a child (such as my husband) was just as good at getting things done around the house as anyone who wasn't paid. (Actually, my husband is always bugging me to pick up after myself!)
I can totally respect the fact that parents don't want to pay their children to do the things in life that they themselves don't get paid for. But that doesn't mean that it's wrong to pay them. I personally will be teaching my son how to "work" around the house, and then how to spend his earnings wisely. (After all, I like a good balance of carrot and stick.)
My parents never tought me money management. I simply asked them for money, and if it was a worthy cause, they gave it to me. I never was shown how to budget or balance a checkbook or any of that stuff. When I got my first job, I was so afraid to misspend money, I just put it all in a savings account for 6 months trying to work up the nerve to do anything with it. It wasn't until I married my husband that someone showed me how to let it go. I'm glad to see that parents are giving children a personal income to manage, no matter how they "earn" it. It will help them in the long run.
I'm so glad you're teaching your boys to help out around the house! ...Besides Saturdays, we didn't ever help with stuff until we were much older and it was harder to get into the habit. And I do think they're future wives will be very happy thanks to you! Awesome job!
My children are older. They also have their own regular chores to do because they are part of the household, take out garbage, make their beds, clean their rooms, put their laundry away. I don't give them an allowance for it. They have the option of signing up to do extra chores to help out if they want to earn some money. Some parents I know give their children an allowance with no strings attached, they are not expected to do any chores at all, and some parents I know give their children an allowance for doing their chores, but only if they get done. I guess it is a matter of choice.