Friday, 27 June 2008
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Mommy Guilt
by Mama FoxWith 3 kids there's no way to get around the guilt of doing something for myself. Recently on a quick shopping trip I bought myself a pair of shorts. It's actually only the 2nd pair of shorts I own. This Texas heat doesn't allow for anything longer. (I'm a capri wearer because of not so in shape thighs.) So I needed shorts, I wanted shorts and damnit I bought shorts. Then I got home and thought about the fact that Fox1 is outgrowing a lot of his tshirts. I could have bought him 3 cheapy shirts for the price of my new shorts. So the joy of new shorts are overshadowed by mama guilt, I put myself above my children. Damnit.
Do you experience mommy guilt too? What was the last thing you felt guilty about?
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Comments (7)
Sometimes, but not as bad. I think it's because I've been at this for a while, and I've gone huge stretches of time not doing much for myself, which doesn't yield good results! I actually went through something similar this year when I started stocking up for the new baby and buying maternity clothes (I had given everything away, I've been starting from scratch) and then oh no - my oldest had a growth spurt out of no where and hardly had anything decent for school clothes. D'oh! We got by until I found some great things at a thrift store and then it was his birthday and grandma took the oppt to get him a few things to wear.
Can we not do a number on ourselves?!
As a momma of 4 (23, 17,13 &11) I have found that despite what we may think or guilt ourselves with regard to our children and their needs is that they do survive!
Enjoy your new shorts. They will give you the much needed lift a momma needs and deserves to have every once in awhile. Our children really do not need as many clothes as we think. Mine usually wear the same few pairs no matter how many choices they have had. We buy only a certain amount to last the season and it works great and saves us money too.
Now...when they get older and become a bit more clothes contious...well that is a different story!
xoo Cat
for me, the most guilt i feel usually comes from having to work at home. there are days when the sun is out and i know she would love to go outside and play... but i need to catch up on work and by the time i'm done the sun is going down and we need to eat dinner. it'd be great to have a fenced off yard!
Oh boy...the most recent? Breaking down and just getting my babe to sleep in the swing. I couldn't hold him anymore! But you know what, he's happy. I think he likes it! So I got over the guilt pretty fast. I'm sure they'll be something new next week though...
ALL THE TIME!!!! I have 4.5 right now and for me to actually buy myself something or go out with my girlfreinds when I could have taken everyone out to a less expensive place for a fun night is horrible, I want to be able to get excited about doing things for myself but then I look around and am like--oh well those ne wjeans can get returned so I can get C the new football pads he needs or the "cool new shirt" M has been checking out and asking "is it on sale yet mom?"
Mostly the guilt works like this: Mommy feels guilty for neglecting friends. So Mommy makes plans to go out with friends. Mommy realizes that going out will mean not being there to bathe Baby Monkey, feed Baby Monkey, and put Baby Monkey to sleep. Mommy feels guilty. Mommy flakes out on friends. Mommy feels guilty for neglecting friends. A vicious cycle, I tell you!
I can't say I really feel too much mommy guilt for buying things for myself since Baby gets more than everything she needs right now thanks to her three sets of loving grandparents. Usually it's about something that she wants to do that is bad for her like eat paper or chew on electrical plugs. I feel bad that I have to take something away from her and she doesn't understand why yet. When I want to buy things for me though, then it's the wife guilt because I think of the things Hubby wants to buy but doesn't because we can't afford it right now. Although it does soothe me to remember his hobbies are much more expensive than mine.
On another note, I also recently bought my second pair of shorts, at Hubby's request, after I had to walk around the zoo in rolled up long jeans because my sole pair of shorts were dirty.