by Mama Koala
Coca-Cola, that is
. I was drinking some Diet Coke to wash down my greasy dinner, when I had a flashback into my childhood. Once every couple of weeks, my parents used to bring home a bucket of KFC, and we'd have chicken night so that my mom could get a break from cooking a full meal. My dad loved having a glass of Coke during chicken night, and of course, I would ask for some as well. When I was in 4th grade (or 5th?), my parents told me something that scared me and put an end to my Coke-drinking days (I only recently started drinking Coke products again because that's what my husband enjoys).
So here's the big fat lie I was told: "
If you drink a lot of Coke, you'll get more dots on your face." Okay, I know that sounds pretty silly, but I had several birthmarks, and a bunch of little dots on my cheeks (you couldn't really see them unless you were looking, but I knew they were there). My dad has his share of dots on his face too, and that was proof enough at the time that Coke = dots!
From that day on, I drank Sprite whenever I did have soda. I was naive enough to think that dark soda meant that I would get dark spots on my skin, and that clear soda was OBVIOUSLY the better choice. I never asked my parents why they wanted me to stay away from Coke, but my best guess is that they didn't think a little kid should have that much caffeine. My first semester of college, I drank Sprite with every meal because of that darn fountain drink machine in the dining hall. I had to go to the dentist every week for a month to fill 4 cavities and get a crown done... and after that month, you better believe I cut down on ALL types of soda.
I have to give credit to my parents for one of the best lies ever told. It was a moment of sheer genius, and I never put up a fight about drinking Coke after that. But is a lie ever worth it? What do you think? And do you ever make up "truth" to convince your kids that mommy knows best?
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Comments (15)
That's a good one! I do make sure soda is a "treat" in the house and not a regular thing. I do love Pepsi and have a sweet tooth so it's good to not have the temptation there.
A few things I remember my mom telling me when I was little was that if I ate the crust on my bread it would make my hair curly. So I started eating the crust on the bread. I know it's not related but it is funny that as an adult some of my wavy hair got really curly. I was also told all parents had eyes in the back of their head (I guess so we would behave when their backs where turned). I questioned all adults incessantly and was skeptical about that one, LOL!
funny...the advertising agency for Coca-Cola for many years was McCann Erickson whose motto was "truth well told"...when I worked there we were cynical and changed it in the halls to "lies well sold"...ha did your parents work at the agency?
Hmmm...this is a good question. My daughter is only 9.5 months, so we're not there yet. However, I am a big fan of being factual with children... age appropriate of course.
I can remember my mother always reverting to the 'because I said so' reason. Now, I know there are people out there who will advocate that saying that to a 2 year old is perfectly reasonable because they can not truly comprehend the REAL reasons you do not want them to do something. I beg to differ. I think if you tell a child in their language ... meaning don't try to epxlain rocket science in specific terms to a 2 year old.... then they will accept it.
Beyond that, if gets you in the habit of giving a valid reason for what you are trying to have them do or not do. If you start the habit of telling a fib or saying 'because I said so' ... it will be more difficult to break later.
I can remember my mother STILL saying 'because I said so' when I was 12, 13, even 16 years old! If I want my daughter to grow up understanding the world around her, I need to tell her specifically why I don't want her doing something or why I want her doing something. I can remember being so frustrated because my mother never seemed to have a valid answer for anything! Consequently I felt as if she knew nothing and didn't really pay much attention to what she said.
Now, of course finding a clever fib instead of just saying 'I said so' is much more creative. But.. I pose this question.... if your parents had been more up front with you about the risks associated with drinking soda... would you have drunk that much soda during college and consequently needed so much dental work?
My mother was a genius with that sort of thing. I don't remember any little lies that had a lasting effect, but she could easily convince me to take a nap as a child by telling me that Santa Claus or the Easter Bunny would drop by and leave me a piece of candy if I did. I'm not sure if her reasoning was that I needed a nap, she needed a break, or both. Whichever the case was, it worked! That said, I'd never do it to my own children.
hahhaa, that is a good lie.
my daughter always put her fingers in her mouth so i say "if u put fingers or hands in yoru mouth, snake's gonna come out and eat u" puahahahhahaa and she listens...
If you go to mercola.com, you can find a lot of scientific reasons that will probably make you rethink the whole drinking soda question...I think I heard that coca cola can be used to clean car batteries and toilets and such, but I don't think that was the point of the post. My husband will tell the boys that a dog will get them if they do xyz. I'm more likely to use language that they can understand when they ask me if they can do something.
My nephew is going through a huge "why?" phase right now..and I'm sure his parents have given him a few little white lies to get him to understand..but I'm pretty sure that for the most part, they are very honest with him. I haven't had many opportunities to tell those, but I've gotten to the point when I say "because I said so!" I can't wait until we get all the funny questions that come along with children!
I have a friend who really wanted a dog as a kid, and his mom didn't want to get one, so she told him that he was allergic to dogs (he got poison ivy once and she blamed that on being close to a dog). He believed this until he was 21 years old.
Seems to be there's plenty of true stuff you could tell kids to get them to stay away from coke, like your own story of needing 4 cavities filled within 6 months!
That reminds me of what my mother used to tell me in order to get me to eat her tuna loaf with onions. She said the onions were not onions but actually saltine crackers (which I liked) that became soft and transparent when cooked in tuna loaf. It worked...for a little while.
I used to be judgmental of some of her tactics but now that I'm a mom with two of my own, I'm a bit more understanding of why she told us some of the things she told us. There were four of us -- 3 boys and me -- and I think after awhile she just got plain weary of explaining things to us and trying to be "reasonable" when that sort of approach provided little to no results.
As for me, I don't recall any white lies I may have told my kids in order to make them do something or stop certain behavior. If there's disobedience, we dole out the appropiate consequence for that situation and reward appropiately the good behavior.
I am going to try my hardest not to make up lies like that to my children. Mostly because of your story. Sometimes children believe things, and it never occurs to them that it could be wrong. That being said, I was told many of these things and I think I turned out just fine. That's why I said I'll try my hardest not to say things like this, but things might slip out once in a while....
@babybooties33@xanga - haha you know, i never thought about it that way, but you might be right - if i had seen pictures of root canals being done, i think i would've been too scared to drink so much soda in college. perhaps i'll try that approach with my kids ;)
My mom told us if we rolled our eyes back in our head they'd get stuck that way. She added to it a story about a girl she knew growing up with eyes that did get stuck. My daughter is too young to tell helpful lies to but I am generally against lies of any kind, especially to children because they almost always will find out eventually and then they'll hold it against you forever. A teacher in college once warned us about this by sharing that he once asked a teacher how high the clouds were and the teacher replied something like 500 miles. When he grew up and learned how high clouds really were, he felt upset at the teacher for either not caring enough to find out the real answer and just making something up to get him off his back. Don't want to harbor feelings of mistrust.
yea that was a pretty good lie. Cola products can be used for a lot of things besides drinking.. Its really not the best stuff to drink
I don't think there's anything wrong with telling kids little fibs for harmless stuff....like the fingers in the mouth or something harmless like that. It's the bigger things that I think do actually deserve an explination that a child can understand. It's not time for that yet for my 6 month old, but it will aproach fast and we'll see what happens.
funny, that is a good one. I wasn't allowed to have coke because of the sugar & caffeine. I'm a little bit on the ADHD side, and any small amount of sugar or caffeine still makes me get insanely hyper. When I was little, the hyperness would turn to violence really fast, so I wasn't allowed to have orange juice or coke because of that. Sprite was ok, and so was anything else caffeine free. I was good with all juices except orange juice for some reason. All I was ever told for why I couldn't have it is because I was "different" and it "makes you too hyperactive," so I always made sure to tell my teachers in school that, it was funny to see this 5 year old the size of the average 2 year old telling the teacher "I can't have orange juice because it makes me hyperactive" lol. I wasn't able to handle orange juice until I was about 15, really, and coke still makes me so hyper that I stay up for over a full 24 hours after one 20 oz coke.